why does everyone tell me not to? ive been going out with him for 3 years, he is 29 and i am 21, he is the MAN OF MY DREAMS (literally)...
i live in a very conservative city where everyone still lives with their parents (i do) and itll probably be a lot funner to live with my man and enjoy ourselves before we decide to have children... am i right'?
2006-11-08 12:43:44 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My advice is to wait until you're at least 25 to make a decision of that magnitude. If he is the right one for you, he will have no problem waiting a few more years. If he isn't willing to wait, then he's not the right one. Good Luck on your decision!
2006-11-08 12:52:11 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Why does everyone tell me not to?"
Character?
A 26 year old that started dating an 18 year old. What happens in 20 years.. does he look for another younger women. There is nothing wrong with the age difference.. its just interesting that he was dating women SO much younger than he is.. when he was 26.
Experience?
There is a reason most people agree its best to wait till your 25 to get married. Because as you get older you get more realistic about what you want out of life. You tastes and styles may change.. that includes you tastes in a mate. If he's the man of your life NOW.. than he'll still be the man of your life in 4 years. NO harm in waiting. IF he's not the man you think he is in 4 years.. then you don't have all the complications of a divorce.
Another thing to consider. He's 30.. and that means that realisticlly you'll be together for about 45 more years. So you've been together for 3 years.. why the rush to get married? You have literly a lifetime. Be sure. Make sure he is the man you think he is. Talk to close friends. ASK them what they really think about him. Listen.. even if they are negative
In the end.. you are going to do what's in your heart and in your head.
2006-11-08 20:58:30 · answer #2 · answered by Vanchaser 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you are 21. It's your call, not anyone else's. I got married when I was 18 and he was 23. We have been married now for 24 years. Although we have been having a very hard time for the past two years, after we thought we were going to split up for good this year due to many reasons, we are now trying to work out of marriage. It looks good so far.
Therefore, if you both feel like you're ready, then go for it. My advice, if you go through with it, don't let too many people in on your issues during marriage. You two work it out and if things go wrong seek counseling.
2006-11-08 20:48:23 · answer #3 · answered by BluePassion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do people tell you that? Well, they are probably a lot older than you and realize that the things that they wanted or thought were a good idea at 21 really weren't a good idea.
I'm older and I would tell you the same thing. If it's true love and he's the man of your dreams, he'll be around when you are in your late 20's and have a clearer picture of what you want out of life.
2006-11-08 20:47:15 · answer #4 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say it is your choice. we all live and learn by our mistakes. Im not saying that it will be a mistake but everyone around you telling you that it is, yeah they may be right, but we all have to live and learn. If we all listened to what other people said and didnt take a chance once in a while we would be like hermit crabs. I say take the chance. And whether you are married for life or divorced in 5 at least you can say you took the chance and have so many memories, instead of wondering for the rest of your life if it would have worked out.
2006-11-08 20:55:30 · answer #5 · answered by honey_sweetest_girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are probably just trying to look out for you, and trying to prevent you from making any mitakes. Maybe experiencing a bit more life before you commit yourself to one person. But then again, you are an adult and have the right to disreguard what other have to say on the matter. And on a similar note, making your own mistakes is the best way to learn.. I know from experience. Do what you feel is right, not what others feel is right.
2006-11-08 20:48:44 · answer #6 · answered by Jennifer M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel that this the man of your dreams, and are ready for the ups and downs of life then go for it. It takes both people to make a relationship work and communication is so important. If you have doubts wait and the relationship might grow stronger or both of you might change your minds. Remember one must be friends first then one can take on the world.
2006-11-08 21:14:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont think that is to young I was 21 and my husband was 26. And if you get married my advice would be to enjoy married life a little while before having kids.
2006-11-08 20:59:52 · answer #8 · answered by 2wild4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should really do it the right way and get married first. The age gap is wide but people hook up with big age gaps all the time. But I'm sure eventually it will matter. Keep doing what you are doing and do it right. You will be proud of yourself and not hurt your family either. Why move in? Just for sex? You can do that anywhere.
2006-11-08 20:56:36 · answer #9 · answered by lazycat 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
They are probably just concerned, I listened to the same thing when my hubby and I got married 13 yrs ago...i was only 19. But two kids later i haven't looked back and never been happier!
2006-11-08 22:12:50 · answer #10 · answered by no one 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋