Can you ban your partner from your kitchen?

Question

What if it was hers once, but you moved in and took it over, since all she ever did with it is keep Powerade and Vietnamese leftovers in the fridge?

When I was sick last week, she washed dishes after me, by hand. (Our dishwasher isn't working.) Sweet, right? Except she forgot what really hot water followed by really cold does to glass, and I have one less Pyrex baking dish, which they are not exactly giving away.

I also, just found out tonight, have two fewer glass storage containers, which again are not exactly being given away. Just in time for my holiday baking, too! She claims she told me, but I was hopped up on Nyquil, which is probably true.

*Is* there a good way to ban your partner from your kitchen?!

And can I say anything without sounding like a petty b!tch, or do I just rant to y'all?

She is that dangerous. Shortly after the dishwasher and garbage disposal (which I fought *hard* with the landlord for) got installed, she sliced the top off a whole cucumber and put the whole thing down the disposal. Had to fix it myself. She is many wonderful things, but "domestic" ain't one of them.

But if she gets her own account, she can rant to you about how I don't dust, vacuum, or make a bed.

Answer 1

Invest in some Rubbermaid storage containers for your partner. I guess the best thing to do would be to wash your own dishes after you cook. By kicking her out of the kitchen, you may make her feel unwanted and there may be some resentment there. I feel your pain. I had a roommate that I love to death and he was pretty clumsy. But you have to love the person more than you do the bakeware.

Answer 2

I think in this case it would sound a bit b!tchy, because she was helping out while you were ill, so it might be a bad time, but if she's ALWAYS breaking things that are yours, she should know that you're not happy with it, and that you might prefer her to leave the cooking and washing-up to you.

I'm banned from someone else's kitchen (and from touching most things in his house, actually) because I'm incredibly clumsy. I wasn't offended, because I know it's true, and he's got some really expensive stuff. But then I don't live there, so it's not really a problem. And it gives me less to feel guilty about.

I have all plastic glasses and plates at my place, because I break so much. I know it looks tacky, but they're all bright cheerful colours and I don't have to worry about them. If you're going to spend your life with someone that clumsy, maybe you should try the same!

Answer 3

One of my ex girl friends band me form my own kitchen
and i am a chef
i never really minded as she had her way to do things
and always kept it clean tidy organized well so i tought
she was sick for about a week and
i looked after her and feed her animals cats and dogs and her and what not
after i clean the kitchen top to bottom disinfected the whole thing inside all of the cabinets scrubbed out the fridge walls ceiling
the kitchen looked clean untill you really looked at it
after my girl friend got better i never went back into the itchn to help again as i was never game enought to
it never mattered that i cleaned all of the kitchen
she still thought it was dirty because of me
we all seem to get a space that is ours
any one else in that space can up set us if they stuff it up
in any small way
if you want your space for you
tell your partner to give you that space
do it nicely and make it seem you are giving them some thing
the two of you have to live together possibly for some time and if you wish to live together for a lot longer then you both need your own space and repect each others space
good luck

Answer 4

interesting, the first problem i see is that you both didnt get a place together. this way its not my place or your place. its a common mistake. now i dont know if your partner is naturally clumsy or doing this in revenge to you.
i know that alot of people when sick are not behaving like their normal selves,(which is a huge Freudian thing), so perhaps she broke these things is because you were being so miserable.
its a working relationship. dont let petty crap get in the way of love. if your not feeling love than its a waste of time. good luck with it.

Answer 5

should I tell you the Truth or lie?
hm, truth here: You KNOW you are behaving petty... thats why you asked. SOMETHING more is what is ReaLLy bugging you huh?

Maybe she knows how important YOUR belongings are to YOU? If you give her hell continuously you probably make her a nervous person. Lighten up and be GRATEFUL she "baby's you". jeesh...

just like living with a MAN if THAT'S the problem.

Lie: hmmm, silly girl for breaking things, kick her out.

Answer 6

Well I've been banned from the kitchen but it was hers to begin with. If she's that dangerous then you should just tell her that you want the kitchen, if it was her first try asking her for it to be just yours, if she's not using it anyway then it shouldn't be that big of a deal.

Just be polite, if she says no then make sure you let your exasperation come through.

Answer 7

Just be tactful. Don't say something like "Stay out of my kitchen!" Write it down if you think you're going to screw up. If you word it right she'll have no reason to get pissed and should take the hint that you don't like having your dishes broken and would rather wash them yourself instead of seeing them end up in the trash time and time again.

Answer 8

Well, accidents will happen and she COULD have just bought some paper plates and plastic glasses and let the dishes pile up until you felt better....

Answer 9

Welcome to working through knots in a relationship. You will work it out, just be sweet and patient. You will find there are chores where she will excel and you won't. Try asking her for her involvement in something she is good at... Keep her distracted. LOL!

Enjoy and love each other!

Answer 10

all you have to do is just tell her if you catch her in the kitchen again you will kick her a** out of the house. that may do it for you, but i sure would hate to live with you because you sound like a ****** of the worst kind.