2006-11-08 06:31:56 · 9 answers · asked by lenny b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I think that you are describing a conditions known as Inhibited sexual desire (ISD). The person with ISD fails to initiate or respond to their partner's desire for sexual activity.
ISD is a very common sexual disorder. The most common cause of ISD seems to be relationship problems wherein one partner does not feel emotionally intimate or close to their mate.
Communication problems, health problems such as depression, insomnia, excessive stress.
Treatment is required by the professional therapist and it depends on the eliminating causes listed above.
2006-11-08 06:36:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a question you should be asking her. There are different reasons why a women loses her sex drive. The fact that you have been with her for 21 years, I'm going to assume that she is at least pre-menopausal. The change in hormones that a woman goes through changes her sexually. The drop in testosterone will lower her sex drive. Hormones also make her change physically and sex may actually be painful now.
She could be going through some type of depression..... loss of sex drive is a major symptom/side effect.
Possibility that she feels the romance is gone and can't "get into it".
Or maybe it is you who has changed and this is just her response to it.
There are so many possibilities, all you can do is talk to her, maybe recommend she see her physician to discuss it. If that doesn't work then couples therapy may be in order.
Good luck.
2006-11-08 06:40:47 · answer #2 · answered by MELISSA B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
many things
it could be you two do not talk anymore and you are moving apart.
it could be she is going through the CHANGE and she is confused or in pain.
it could be the worse..another person in her life..
only you know if you have been talking to her and been attentive to her needs...
so what I would do is this....make a dinner date...make her go..and already have the place give you a seat way in the back away from most people..then get some cheese crackers and wine to start off with, pour her some wine, bring the glass to her lips and have her take a tiny drink, then kiss her, and say something corny..you lips taste so much better than this wine..or something like that..then stat serving the cheese and crackers..and slowly calmly, softly start talking about ALL of it..if she gets upset..ask her to please calm down..we are here for a good nice night out.and for some nice talk between two lovely people who are in love...and continue..
is she continues to fight..well...just eat and GO home..
end the night..
and when she asks why..tell her you were trying.but she does not.so ask her whats up..and seeing that you are home..you can let it all out..but let me say this..do NOT say anything in anger..stay calm. and keep your head about you..it will be much better for you ...
and if you can afford it.take her on a cruise first, this way it is YOU two in the small room and on a ship...
good luck
smile
2006-11-08 06:46:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask her- she's the only one that will be able to answer that truthfully for you. Just sit down and talk to her- you've been together for 21 years be... be open about it and have a heart to heart.
2006-11-08 06:34:59 · answer #4 · answered by bree_1384 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I hate to be the one that says it but your girl in cheating. She doesnt want sex with you but make no mistake she IS having sex.
2006-11-08 06:36:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
maybe you need to spice it up alittle bit. You could be getting boring to her honey. Get loose and find some things to show her what your working with. Get Bus...................y!
2006-11-08 06:37:41 · answer #6 · answered by 2sweet4u 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
some one new is now in her life
2006-11-08 06:35:48 · answer #7 · answered by duster 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Maybe getting too old for this. Use your hand buddy.
2006-11-08 06:35:42 · answer #8 · answered by seek_fulfill 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
she could be getting it somewhere else
2006-11-08 06:34:22 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋