Do gay men and women who embody gay stereotypes reflect badly on the rest of the gay community?

Question

Stereotypes like the effeminate man or butch lesbian? Does it embarass you on some level? Do you feel you need to explain to your straight friends they aren't typical or what?

Hope this doesn't sound like a loaded question or expressing a point of view, i am not, just curious.

Answer 1

No, perhaps the media plays it up for their own purposes. People who stand out or fit a stereotype become targets for those that wish us ill. Is it embarrassing? Hell no.

If anything these people need our support, not disdain, they are the ones that suffer abuse to a greater degree than those who "pass".

I am embarrassed by any gay person that uses "straight acting" to describe them self. Usually they aren't so much. I find it amusing those that try to distance themselves from the very thing they are. It doesn't matter what you call yourself, you are what you are.

We should tend to our own gardens before we dare tell anyone else how to act or how to appear. To do otherwise is a waste of time.

So, no, they reflect on them self, they nor I have any reason at all to be embarrassed. Only apologist and self loathing gays have something to be embarrassed about.

Answer 2

It doesn't bother or embarass me that some gay men are effeminate or some lesbians are butch. It bothers me when others assume that ALL gay men are effeminate and ALL lesbians are butch.

I do think shows like "Will and Grace" and "Queer Eye" do harm because they (maybe unknowingly) portray a stereotypical, negative image, which the general public believes to be a true one.

It also bothers me that I feel like an outsider just because I have long hair and wear skirts. I'm not trying to "pass"; I'm not in the closet; I just look terrible with a buzz cut.

Answer 3

The gay stereotypes don't bother me as long as the person is comfortable with it.
What does bother me is when (gay or anyone for that matter) people are unkind and try to push their views to hard on people. It tends to put people off. Many can't imagine a gay family living quietly, working, not clubbing or making a big ordeal over their sexuality.
Don't get me wrong, I don't think we should be in the closet by any means. I just think that when we present our lifestyles we need to put it in a good light.

Answer 4

I think the stereotypes are perpetuated through the media. And that needs to change.

Am I embarrassed of effeminate men or butch women? Hell no. Why would I be embarrassed by people who are just being themselves? It bears no reflection on me. I know who I am, and I'm comfortable with it.

Answer 5

I think that the mainstream media tends to look at a very vocal and very small portion of the homosexual community and then judge us all to be like them.
G0ys abhor the gay stereotype and we do everything in our power to distance ourselves from it.
This bothers some gays and they call us homophobes which is absurd since we are the first ones to point out that we are homosexuals.
The gay stereotype is unfortunately the reason so many in the straight community hate all homosexuals.

My wife is able to accept the fact that I am bisexual only because she understands that I am g0y and she knows what a g0y is.

Answer 6

I think we need to figure out why he hate sissies and bulldykes. Why do they offend us. A man is humanbeing with a penis, testicals, and can produce sperm...not a macho person who can lift heavy objects and desires hunting large animals.

btw, different societies have different ideals on Masculine and Feminine so the US version my be considered obscene in Malta.

Answer 7

i dont know, i mean i know a lot of gay people, and only a few are stereotypical, but on the other hand, i know lots of straight people, and a bunch of them are their stereotypes too, thats how we get those stereotypes, people are them. i dont think it hurts or hinders, people are who they are, they cant help it.

Answer 8

I don't think so. We are who we are. HUMANS.