How common is it for women to have rape fantasies?

Question

I was surfing Wikipedia the other day, and I stumbled onto their article for "Rape Fantasy". According to Wikipedia "36% of women have had a rape fantasy, and 10% of women report this is their favorite type of fantasy". Just go to Wikipedia and type in Rape Fantasy.

That sounds screwed up. How true is this? Is Wikipedia reliable at all? The average man, me included, has no desire to rape a woman at all, and to think that women actually secretly want that level of domination is disturbing. I was even upset by that rape scene in Conan as a kid (before I went through puberty, indicating that a desire to rape is not inherent in men).

Maybe it should be renamed Wackopedia. Or, maybe women are a lot masochistic than I thought. Which one is it ladies?

Answer 1

I guess it depends on how you would define the term "rape fantasy." I mean, if reading a Harlequin romance and imagining the handsome hero ripping your bodice open without your consent is a "rape fantasy" then, yeah, maybe 36% of all women in the USA have had that kind of fantasy. But remember, it's a FANTASY and, more importantly, the sanitized Harlequin romance fantasies are just that, santitized! So sanitized that I wouldn't even call it "rape." It's just a woman saying "no" when her heart (and loings) really means "yes."

Which is a rotten thing because then misguided women might do that and confuse you guys all to pieces. After all, "no" should mean "no" and guys that keep going after being told "no" should be prosecuted.

But they don't want domination. Like one of the other people posted, it's all this fantasy about being irresistible, about the guy being so "smitten" that he can't stop himself. Talk about super- pheromones!

As another person (or persons) posted, it's also about being relieved of the responsibility for their own sexual feelings. About being "a good girl" but allowed to experience sex.

It's not about rape. It's about a considerate lover who does what you want done, how you want it done, to bring you to climax and then being able to say "He made me do it" so you're not labeled a sl*t in your own mind.

So glad to hear that you have no desire to rape a woman but, think of the other way, wouldn't you love it if women found YOU so irresistible that they wouldnt' take "no" for an answer?

Answer 2

Yes, it is likely that part of the reason for the rape fantasies is dealing with the rape. In that way one can take control of the situation in fantasy whereas you were unable to do so when it occurred and have it end in a manner which you enjoy. However, many women that were never raped also have rape fantasies. It is a very common fantasy for a variety of reasons, many of which were listed above by another answerer. It is also true that women often enjoy a little gentle persuasion during actual sex by the male partner because of our biological and psychological predispositons. Sexuality is complex and it involves both physical and psychological components. Fantasy helps express and deal with desires.

Answer 3

It depends what they classify as a rape fantasy.

I've known MANY women (maybe even MOST women I know) who have had rape or pseudo-rape fantasies. They might include being dominated, having aggressive sex, being drugged, hypnotised or sedated before having sex, or "seduction" fantasies, where the woman is just so beautiful that the man just can't help himself but take her without asking. When you think about, romance novels and soap operas often portray these kind of pseudo-rapes as highly erotic and desirable.

I think the important thing to remember is that they are fantasies, and the person having the fantasy is always in complete control of her feelings, physical sensations and the outcome. In other words, even a rape fantasy is NOTHING like being raped.

I suspect that the "average" man who has rape fantasies also imagines it in a way totally unlike real rape eg the woman is secretly really into him but just can't admit it, and enjoys every minute, even if she is saying no.

Answer 4

I dont' think its anywhere near that high. And even then, its not a rape fantasy, its a domination fantasy. Being dominated in a loving and stable relationship is different because ultimately you can say stop. But rape involves no power or control over anything. They really should change the name of the fantasy. Some stupid pervos are going to use that as justification.

Answer 5

Real rape has nothing to do with fantasy. No woman desires to be raped in reality. In a fantasy though you have complete control.

Real rape is not about sex, its about power and control. This is why its used as a weapon of terror in war, and why it is so demeaning and degrading.

Fantasies are all about control. You decide the complete circumstances, so in a fantasy, that lack of control can be sexually enticing. Its also a safe place for women to go because its not likely to happen. Its like a guy fantasying that his two tall blond Swedish neighbors come to his door because they need a man and you will do. Its not happening in real life, but isn't that a hot idea to jerk off to? Now, say your female and the Swedes are guys, why is that not a hot idea? Same circumstances, simply reversal of genders.

In real life, you should be upset about rape. There is a very good chance that sometime in your life, your wife, your mother, your sisters, aunts and nieces, daughter, or just close friend will be assaulted. As a man, you should be outraged that this happens and do what you can to prevent it. However in fantasy, as long as it stays in fantasy, its just simply another taboo idea that gets people off.

Answer 6

Rape is an act of violence not passion. Fantasies are about uncontroled passion. Women desire a man to be so overwhelmed by their beauty that they loose controll. Some times it is the uncontrolled passion between two strangers that is the fantasy. Women seem to think that these encounters will lead to a climax. The Movies Lie.
Wikipedia is asking the wrong questions. They should ask a woman to describe the fantasy. Romance novels don't describe rape. Try watching Young Lady Chatterley(uncut version).

Answer 7

Unfortunately there are some women who have problems with self-esteem, and rape can be imagined as a way to punish themselves. Then there are women who are into unusually aggressive sexual activities; sometimes those women have self-esteem issues and sometimes not. So this "finding" by Wikipedia doesn't surprise me at all, but I might debate how precise their research study really is. I also unfortunately have to say that the average man might not desire rape, but some men do have rape fantasies too and it's probably higher than 36%.

Answer 8

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RE:
How common is it for women to have rape fantasies?
I was surfing Wikipedia the other day, and I stumbled onto their article for "Rape Fantasy". According to Wikipedia "36% of women have had a rape fantasy, and 10% of women report this is their favorite type of fantasy". Just go to Wikipedia and type in Rape Fantasy.

That...

Answer 9

36% is quite substantial isn't it?
I don't have rape fantasies (and I consider myself a fairly average woman). I will admit to fantasizing/dreaming about sex in public though.
I always thought of a fantasy as something desirous.
I cannot imagine any woman with real self esteem would desire to be raped.
To Wikipedia; I use it a lot for research and have found it very informative.
But there again they get the information from somewhere else don't they?
So just how reliable is it? I don't know.
PS. Thanks, I'm relieved the average man does not fantasize about rape.

Answer 10

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Having rape fantasies is not uncommon among women. Studies indicates that between 31% and 57% of women have rape fantasies, and they are frequent in 9% to 17% of women. I think most women really appreciate subtle to moderate domination in the bedroom--a little forceful restraint, a little pain--as long as we feel safe. There are a few theories to why women have rape fantasies: Desirabilty - Many women like to believe that they're so attractive that men cannot resist the urge to overtake them. Reaction to Trauma - Most masturbatory fantasies are attempts to transform early difficult experiences into pleasure. So those who have been sexually abused may try to master their trauma by taming those experiences. Masochism - The idea that women desire suffering. Women who engage in masochistic sex are more likely to have rape fantasies, but the great majority of women with rape fantasies do not want real rape. So, this theory may only apply to a small group of women. Sexual Blame Avoidance - Women are socialized to not seek out sex (unless they want to be considered sluts), but if they're having sex against their will they can avoid guilt. This theory would also only apply to some women. Openness to Sexual Experience - In some ways this is the opposite of the last one, and it doesn't explain rape fantasies but it describes the type of person to have them. If you're sexually open, you entertain a greater variety of fantasies. Male Rape Culture - The idea that women have been conditioned to buy into men's fantasies of domination. Biological Predisposition to Surrender - In many mammalian species, the male must pursue and subdue the female in order to mate. This theory states that women may be programmed to surrender to the successful dominant male. Sympathetic Activation - The sympathetic nervous system becomes engaged in times of stress or danger, activating a fight or flight response marked by increased heart rate, respiration, pupil dilation, and genital arousal. Just like on a roller coaster, fear, pleasure, and excitement go hand in hand.