I have three encounters with women, but they were all drunken 1 offs. My husband knew about them afterwards and he didn't mind, infact it helped with better sex.
last week out of the blue i decided to go on alesbian chat site and met someone we spoke on the net and we have met up twice. I told my husband after the second meeting and i thought he would be ok with it but he's not. he says he was happy when it was no strings one night only encounters but an on going relationship he can't deal with. he says i'm entering the unknown and i do not know how much i will end up liking it with my gf and it will damage our relationship. niether me or my gf want threesome so he could never join us. i s he right to be worried? what shall i do?
2006-11-07 12:47:14 · 12 answers · asked by Andrea B 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are taking your affections outside of your marriage and that is cheating.
He was trying to be understanding with the first escapade but now it is becoming serious and you need to listen to him or your marriage will fall apart.
If you abslolutely cannot control your need to be with a woman, you will have to stop telling him about it......
2006-11-07 13:03:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he has a right to be worried. First off, you had the current encounter without even telling him...that's not being open and honest about your activities. If you had asked him about it, he may have been ok with it...but now you've lost some trust with him.
Second, you're talking about an ongoing relationship with this other lady. I think if you're serious about your husband, then you need to find out what he is/isn't comfortable with and go from there.
2006-11-08 07:39:17 · answer #2 · answered by The ~Muffin~ Man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he has every right to be worried. You are trying to have a relationship with someone else besides your husband. Just because this other person happens to be female doesn't make it any better. I know from experience that infedelity hurts whether it's with another woman or man, because I had to deal with both. It's a kick in the gut when your spouse wants to have sexual relationships with other people, especially even more so if they don't want you included.
2006-11-07 21:06:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Things get very complicated when you have more than one relationship at a time.
First, remember your commitments to your husband. If you leave your husband over this girl, or if he leaves you over you spending too much time with her or not enough time with him, it's on your head. So, yes, he's right to be worried. Promise him that won't be a problem and that he won't get any less attention from you, then make your promise come true. If he's still against it, break it off. Your husband has to come first.
But if he accepts your promises at face value and you can keep them, then it might be okay. You should have told him before you met her, and let him okay it. You're not free to date without consulting him first. You're married, all your romance and intimacy should belong to him and be his to keep for himself or give away as he sees fit.
2006-11-08 09:54:46 · answer #4 · answered by Sean J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I was your husband I would be a happy camper, as long as I could join ever now and then or watch.
It sounds like your husband is against it, therefore you need to be more discreet about it.
I wish you the best
2006-11-07 20:50:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is right to be worried. How would you feel if your husband went out and dated. I feel that marriage should be between two people. (im not saying just a man and a woman, just two people that love each other, i support gays, etc.) If you dont love your husband enough to just be with him, I suggest doing something about it.
2006-11-07 20:51:46 · answer #6 · answered by musicgurl1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's losing you. just as you would fall for another man, he sees you emotionally falling for someone else. before it was just a sexual encounter with a woman, which he may have felt was harmless, but now he sees you cheating.
i see it eventually ruining your relationship, especially with you already talking about sexual encounters without him. you need to decide which you want more him or her.
2006-11-07 21:12:49 · answer #7 · answered by locowherto 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are cheating and disrespecting your
marriage vows,your gf knows you are
married and she is contributingto the
situation, I would carefully re-think this
whole thing,becuase you are putting
your marriagein danger,of course he feels
threatened,same as if it were another man,
wise up.
2006-11-07 21:05:17 · answer #8 · answered by Jaymagiclady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Check Yahoo answers! I Your husband is on here! If you read his question I think you will know his dilemma. Then I think you will have your answer!!
2006-11-07 22:29:48 · answer #9 · answered by eimmahs 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes he DOES have the right to be worried. He is MARRIED to you. When you are MARRIED you don't have sex with ANYONE else but you're spouse. You have committed ADULTERY, had you been MY spouse you would be my EX-spouse by now.
2006-11-07 21:18:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋