Well basically, About 3 weeks ago I cheated on my boyfriend with this guy. My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship, and hadn't seen each other in 7 months. I started feeling lonely, sad, and so on. Well I ended up kissing this guy. I told my boyfriend the next day, and after a long disussion we were 'ok'. Well, 4 days after that I ended up cheating on him again with the same guy. I was incredibly drunk, but knew what was happening. Afterwords I felt so horrible and left driving home (even though drunk). I haven't told my boyfriend that I cheated the 2nd time. We had a discussion about things that would make us say its over, and one of his was if i ever cheated again. I don't want to lose him because I love him with all of my heart, but I know that he needs to know.. what should I do?
2006-11-07 08:13:22 · 43 answers · asked by eousou 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The thing is, I really do love this guy. He means the world to me. I know I made a big mistake, and own up to that..But It will never happen again. After many days of crying, not sleeping, etc,I realized fully how much I love him and am willing to wait as long as we need to be together.. I am terrified of losing him, and would feel dead all together if I do. I know i need to tell him, he deserves that much... I just dont know if I can
2006-11-07 08:30:12 · update #1
You obviously don't care about loosing him since you continue to cheat on him. If you really cared about him then cheating would be the fartherest thing in your mind. And you should be even more ashamed of driving while drunk. You could kill yourself but even more importantly you could kill someone else.
You obviously don't care about anyone but YOU since you think nothing of cheating and driving home drunk!
2006-11-07 08:22:52 · answer #1 · answered by Premo Mom 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you have learned that the 2nd one is the last there is no reason to ever say anything more. Of course if you went to bed with this guy and being drunk did not use protection....well you have a real problem.
If you feel you will never do that again because you truly love your boyfriend there is no sense saying anything. But do it once more and you better send him a dear john letter and dump him because you don't love him as much as you thought.
Of course there is no reason why he couldn't be doing the same.
Long distance relationships are hard for both of you.
We all need to be able to talk to and hold the one we love and if you can't do that you find yourself where you are now.
Sit down and do some serious soul searching. What is truly important to you right now. Go from there.
2006-11-07 08:28:51 · answer #2 · answered by John B 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is *extremely* difficult for cheaters to change. it takes lots of time devoted to thinking about what a liar you are. About how to be honest instead of hiding things from the other person. About knowing it's better to own up right away and take a little sting than wait and lie and hide it only to devastate the other person. Few people can stay at this task long enough to change - hence the old saying that "cheaters never change."
Say you continue seeing each other - you and your b/f, not your eff buddy.
How many years down the road will you finally admit the affair? And won't it devastate him when you do? Just tell him now. Affairs are about making decisions for the other person without telling them. How do you think he would feel if he came to see you and tasted another guy's vanilla on your breath? Isn't it only fair to tell him so *he* can decide what he wants to do - not have *you* decide for him?
2006-11-07 08:42:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop lying. There is no way you love him with all your heart. If you did, then you wouldn't have shared your body with anyone. You would have known that he was the only one who could have satisfied you. You need to be honest with your boyfriend and take whatever he gives. To be dishonest and continue on the way you are is just wrong. I think you should break it off with him until he comes back. It's not fair to him. You admit you are lonely and obviously can't be without a man. Imagine how you would feel if he did that to you. It would break your heart so bad. That is how he felt the first time you kissed that guy. Good luck and I will say a prayer for you.
2006-11-07 08:38:39 · answer #4 · answered by cookie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is hard being in a long distance relationship. Especially when you can't be physical with anyone. I know, I use to be a navy wife. However, if you are not married to the guy, then don't feel bad you kissed another guy but, you do need to tell him that it did happen you owe him that. If you want this man then I suggest that you do not see the other guy again. If it were me. I would go ahead and get laid. Goodluck!
2006-11-07 12:11:43 · answer #5 · answered by VON 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you loved him you wouldnt have done it. You, as a person, are able to decide what is right and what is wrong. If he told you that the relationship would be over if you did it again.. then guess what honey.. YOU made your own choices that night, you made that bed, now you have to sleep in it!! YOU choose to drink and do things you knew he wouldnt like you doing. Sounds like your not mature enough for a serious relationship. Hopefully you will do the right thing and let this guy go and find an honest woman.
2006-11-07 08:18:15 · answer #6 · answered by kutskova29 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him he needs to know. And when he dumps you use that part of your heart you used to cheat on him with to get over him. You say how much you love him with all your heart. Well if it with all your heart then why did you cheat and better yet why did you put your self in a position to be alone with this guy knowing that you and this guy had kissed before. Your story does not make any sense. Grow up and move on, you made the first step by admitting your failed, now pick yourself up and go on.
2006-11-07 08:46:37 · answer #7 · answered by Joesmoe 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u go girl cheating the best ! c'mon long distance don't work. & getting drunk is not an excuse. just next time don't drive ,stay there u could have had some morning loving too. just tell your boyfriend & breakup with him. do u think he's not cheating on u. a real guy like me would of broke up w/u the first time u told me, that why he didn't.
2006-11-07 08:30:57 · answer #8 · answered by tony s 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do the right thing and put an end to your LDR. Everyone needs and crave physical conection and companionship that phone or email cannot cover. You are not a horrible person, you are just human and a practical person. Cahnces are that he feels the same way and has not tell you.
LDR are hard to endure. Move on and give the other guy a chance.
Good luck
2006-11-07 08:25:51 · answer #9 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I can really relate to that. I cheated before, and this was not with my boyfriend. I cheated on my husband, once and I confused. Your in a long distance relationship and your a women who has needs. Not saying that you couldn't hold out, but things happen. At least you're women enough to admit your wrong. But, whos to say that your boyfriend is being faithful to you. So, I feel that you should keep that to yourself.That's one thing that I've learned his only your boyfriend, men come a go. One thing to remember is that a man will never admit there wrong doing. So my advise to you is see if the relationship something that you want.
2006-11-07 08:23:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Once upon a time there was a woman who made a mistake while driving. She hit a car and destroyed her car as well...... then she stood there and cried "why can't the dents just disappear". You made a mistake so deal with it. What you are asking is how do you get away with something you did knowing it was wrong in the first place. DUH!
Next you'll be asking if all guys are jerks, right?
GROW UP and take responsibility for your own actions.
2006-11-07 09:05:19 · answer #11 · answered by open_phunguy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋