my bf thinks we should wait but he also says that he doesnt believe in love and marraige and still says " I love you"? what should i do
2006-11-07 07:55:40 · 27 answers · asked by sexydee_lpn 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
Before you go any further in having a child with this man - make sure that the two of you have a sound relationship with similar future goals.
If he doesn't believe in marriage, do you? I know you may be excited at the idea of having a child and love your bf.....but a child can put a lot of strain on a relationship. Make sure the two of you are stable and can see each other going down the SAME road together.
Talk to him, ge it all out on the table. Make sure you and him see eye to eye. Only after that happens should you move forward and discuss TTC with him further.
Good luck!!!!
2006-11-07 08:00:43 · answer #1 · answered by Just Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a really good question? Have the two of you been together for a really long time, you may want to take that into consideration... The only one that can really ans were that question to it's full extent of honesty is you because you are the only on knows how you feel about the situation... If u have a good job and you are pretty well financially stable, and you would like to have a baby that would be a decision that you and your b/f have to make together. B/c it is not only you that has to be the one that make the baby. Right?? Other than that i would think that it is a great idea b/c I am 18 and my b/f is 21 and I am expecting in about 2 1/2 monthes...
2006-11-07 08:04:17 · answer #2 · answered by Lil' Moma 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you should have a baby with him because if he doesnt believe in love or marriage then he sounds like someone that is not worth having a baby with. But if he says I love you and doesnt believe in love then it sounds like he doesnt love you at all. Do some serious thinking about whether this guy is worth having a child with. A kid is a lot of responsibility and is not something to take lightly. Wait until he is ready for marriage before thinking about having a baby. And wait until you are SURE that you want to stay with him. Hope this helps!
2006-11-07 08:07:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait till you find a real man to help and to commit to the responsibilities of raising a child. You may be ready but the baby needs two parents and sounds like you would be alone. Good job now but wouldn't it be nice to stay home and nurture your baby till he could attend school. If not that amount of time at least the first year of their lives being with their mommy. They are little only once. Find a real man that you love and one that loves you and ready to start a family. Patience , there are a few good men out there ready for the commitment.
2006-11-07 08:06:48 · answer #4 · answered by Chuck C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A baby is an 18 year commitment. A 24/7 18 year commitment. Also, you will be trading your good paying job for one that, even tho it does have it's rewards, for a NON-PAYING job that easily costs $2000 to $5000 the first year, not including the dr's or hospital and add to that your paycheck lost. Your BF is right. Wait. And if he isn't into commitment to you now, it is very possible that you will be doing this non-paying job ALONE. He needs time to get his thoughts about his life together and he deserves this time. I would be both immature and unfair to him and you to do this without more planning, because once a baby arrives it is all about the the baby needs and wants. You, girl, will be second fiddle to that child of yours until she is old enough to be an adult.
2006-11-07 08:07:32 · answer #5 · answered by koko 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my god NO not w/ this man not at this time you might think your ready but your not enjoy your years grow up a little more and than decide but children or a lot of time and MONEY daycare, medical, clothes, formula, food, medications,
Also the trauma to your body wait until 24 or older you need to try to find someone better for your baby and you than someone who says to wait and doesn't believe in love marriage doesn't need to happen for the baby but raising a kid on your own is hard
2006-11-07 07:59:48 · answer #6 · answered by barbie89032 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Money doesn't make you ready for a baby. It allows you to care for the child financially. Maybe you are ready for a baby, but your boyfriend doesn't sound like he is ready to give the love it will take. You don't have to be married to love and care for a child. Maybe your dude hasn't seen the right things from marriage. One might not have anything to do with the other. But you have to look to the future, how will it be for you and the child in 5 years..in 10..
2006-11-07 08:06:19 · answer #7 · answered by sassicake 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't believe in love and marriage then you need to find a new guy! How can he say something he doesn't believe in?
Babies shouldn't even be on your mind with a relationship with a guy like that.
If your BF doesn't want to have kids then there is a good reason for it.
Make sure you are with someone you want to be a daddy to your children. You should atleast date for awhile and get married frist.
2006-11-07 08:01:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
having a good just isnt a good reason to have a baby when you have a baby its because you are ready and you dont have to ask ppl if your ready having a baby is more then being able to provide for it money wise it also takes love and responsibility if you and your b/f arnt in love and are just wanting a baby wait until you have found true love and have both parents to raise the baby i suggest you wait a baby is something that is forever hunny think it out and then you decide much luck 2 ya
2006-11-07 08:00:46 · answer #9 · answered by chunkybooty20 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The decision will ultimately come down to you but it doesn't sound like your bf will commit. It is different for different people. I was 18 and my husband 19 when we had our first, and we've been married 11 years and have 3 kids. However, my sisters weren't so lucky. make sure he is the one for you or you could be left alone with a baby if you do get pregnant. Good luck in whatever you decide.
2006-11-07 07:58:09 · answer #10 · answered by Army Wife 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋