Why are so many gays so unhappy?

Question

There was a study out and they came to a conclusion that gays are not happy. I thought they would be happy with their descion.

Answer 1

be cause being gay is wrong a sin against nature

Answer 2

Let's start with the fact that it isn't a decision. It's a reality -- the only decision is whether to be as self-hating and unhappy as Reverend Haggard evidently has been -- and as others like him are (see the University of Georgia study on homophobia and homosexuality), or whether you accept yourself and try to live a decent life.

Even if you do accept yourself however, even today, with all the gains we have made -- for many gay people, it is very hard. At least some close family members reject more than 50% of gay people -- homosexuals are the last minority in the US where prejudice is permitted, and fundamentalist religions continue to hammer away on old stereotypes and cultish beliefs as a way to attack gay people, particularly gay young people (I knew I was gay when I was 8, although I didn't figure out the name until I was 13).

These pressures from society lead a lot of gay teens to the brink of, or the act of suicide.

Some of us however are happy regardless. I've always been happy -- have helped many other people, raised two (straight) boys from their early teens to adulthood, and now in my late 30s have a lover with whom I've been for 15 years.

We are very happy.

Nor are we the sole exception, I know many happy gay people. That does not mean that overall, some gay people, particularly those who hate themselves for what they are, are not very happy at all -- and until we have a truly equal world where people do not use others' differences to fuel their own ego-driven attacks -- those sad little ones will drag the happiness quotient for all gays down -- I am quite sure.

Not to mention the false studies by people like the defrocked psychologist Dr. Paul Cameron, studies which sometimes distort what actual gays think in order to attack them more effectively. Those we can never forget.

If I can help further, contact me.

Kind thoughts,

Reynolds
http://www.rebuff.org
[e-mail]

Answer 3

Point 1) "Gay people", not "gays".
Point 2) Not a "descion" (sic): born that way.
Point 3) Everyone's different.

I personally am unhappy sometimes, usually about stupid mistakes I've made, but I'm pretty sure I'd have been just as stupid if I'd been born straight (if not more so), and thus just as unhappy. Other times I'm fine, and I reckon most people are. It depends on circumstances, not sexuality.

Don't believe all the rubbish you read - try to learn a bit of judgment.

Answer 4

I've heard of this study before, it was done in the 1980s or 1970s and another was done in the 90s I believe. Let's think about what the gay community was like then shall we?? Oh that's right, the world was blaming gay men for the HIV/AIDS virus. Would you be happy about that??

Those studies were poorly conducted and I don't know any unhappy GLBTQIs. Anyone is susceptible to depression, gay or straight. Some studies done in America, especially those related to GLBTQIs are usually flawed and uninformative because of bias and lack of honesty.

Answer 5

Gay men and women do have more problems with depression and suicide. Gay young people are three times more likely to commit suicide. It's a reaction to bigots, and the hassles we face in every day life. If people made a stronger effort to be fair-minded and less bigoted, it would be much less of a problem. (Take note: I would say you probably fall under this category, judging by the way you've stated your question.) In my opinion, people who are bigoted and voice bigoted views have blood on their hands when it comes to gay teenagers. The majority of them have it hard enough as it is, and the condemnation and harassment only makes it worse.
Examine your conscience.

And why would you say it's a choice? Is being heterosexual a choice? I honestly don't care one way or the other, but you're making a huge assumption.

Answer 6

yet gay, additionally potential stupid now too!(as in an insulting time era) i may be unhappy if i replaced into squished between 2 polar-opposite meanings, happy or stupid,reason i comprehend that i'm no longer that stupid, yet i'm happy.you notice the place this is going? human beings use gay in an offensive way too, now a days, you comprehend and it somewhat is variety of impolite/offensive/depressing,especially with toddlers of immediately, gay does not recommend happy or gay to them, it only considered as an insult, that's the comparable word as gay besides as happy.

Answer 7

Gay or not, we're all emotional human beings and can be unhappy at times, just as well as happy at times. Gays can be unhappy and that's okay! It's healthy to express a wide range of emotions--but not stay in one forever.

Answer 8

Perhaps they're unhappy because they're afraid of getting beaten when in public, or of being rejected by their families, or told by complete strangers that they are disgusting and are going to burn in hell. I'd think that kind of stress would make anyone feel unhappy at least some of the time.

Answer 9

dear, gays are no more unhappy than straights. the universal question is why is humanity unhappy. and being gay is not a decision, coming out is a decision being gay is NOT a choice. it's very freeing to live your life openly, but there are risks and prices you pay. should i have to worry about being attacked for having a rainbow on my car, or shot for holding hands with my boyfriend? or afraid that if my employer finds out I'll lose my job? y'all don't even realize how easy you have it.

Answer 10

I am happy! I have everything I could ever want. I own my own wildly successful business. Have my own house. Have a brand new luxury vehicle sitting outside. I am seeing some guys who are totally hot and treat me like a king. I have great friends! and I am only 23! What is lacking from my life....nothing. And you know if I lost it all I would still be happy because I know I am strong enough to do it all over again. So your study is bogus.....

Answer 11

Living in a society that rejects them for who they are is one obvious reason for anyone to be subject to depression. But the gays I know are very upbeat, well adjusted and happy, loving people.