i get my son every other weekend a situation his mother and i came up with the court order was for different days but the judge said we could change as needed. my question is should my son be made to come over or atleast given the choice, he is 5 yaers old and my thiking is at five he knows what he does and does not want to do on the other hand his mother does not think so what do you think ?
2006-11-07 05:33:25 · 9 answers · asked by OFFICER CAMPBELL 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
keep in mind when he is made to come over without him wanting to is that much more difficult to deal with.
2006-11-07 05:34:26 · update #1
please! didn't the judge tell you to put your child 1st
so please don't put this child in the middle of a fight
be a man and man up
2006-11-07 05:36:35 · answer #1 · answered by samatha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter only gets to see her father everyonce in a while. That is because we live 3 hours apart so she normally wants to go. She is 5 years old. Now when we first got seprated she didn't want to go at all unless I would go with her. She would cry and beg not to go. I made her go anyway. It is hard thing to do but she needs to see her father. Now when it is time for her to go, no problem. I think if I would have given her the choice she would never wanted to see her Dad. I am the one that takes care of her so why would she want to leave that safe enviornment. Some times it is not easy for the child to make the adjustment of living in two different places. Just don't give him the choice at 5 years old of whether he gets to spend time with you or not. Get him on a set schedule. He will get use to it and all will be fine after a while. Everything takes time with a child, they don't catch on as fast as adults.
2006-11-07 05:45:43 · answer #2 · answered by adarmbruster 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your right in giving your son a choice . Sometimes children don't want to do stuff . Even if it something to do that is fun or they do on a regular basses . Remember your son is a human being . Not a toy to be passed back and forth . Sounds like your X wife wants to get rid of the little tyke so she can have the time to do things that she wants to do with out your son . If that is not the reason then ask her why would she force your son to do something he doesn't want to do .
2006-11-07 05:45:01 · answer #3 · answered by Angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do think that a five year old should have the choice to decide if he/she wants to visit a parent. I think parents should try to listen and respect the child's choice if he/she does or does not want to visit a parent.
Instead of forcing the child, maybe the three of you could sit down and try to find out from him why he does not want to visit. You could also let him know why the visitations are important to you. There could be any number of reasons for his decisions but I think its best to let him know you respect him as a person and try to follow his decision.
2006-11-07 05:45:29 · answer #4 · answered by Lucy E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The child is only 5 years old and not able to make good decisions. You deserve to spend time with your son so he knows you and gets to love you. Often times children will cling to one parent or the other when there is a divorce. You deserve a relationship with your son and your wife is right.
2006-11-07 05:39:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter is also 5 and I give her the choice, if she doesn't want to see her father. She doesn't have too, but my situation is a little different and she can only go over with supervised visits. He has a drinking problem. So if it was up to me she would have no contact with him. But I feel she knows what she wants and will not force her to go over. That's cruel.
2006-11-07 05:39:43 · answer #6 · answered by Sabrina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At 5 a child wants to stay at home with mom because she is having ice cream for dessert! He has no real clue what he really wants. It seems like you are just not able or wanting to put up with all his attitudes instead of just the fun ones....Your ex wife is right.
2006-11-07 05:42:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your choice as a parent, but I wouldn't let a 5 year old call the shots
2006-11-07 05:36:20 · answer #8 · answered by grrl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the reason that kids have to wait until they are teens to decide if they want to visit, is because they are to young to make these decisions on their own, 5 is too young to decide.
my ex had unlimited visitation, he could pick them up whenever he wanted, or not. I figure he has always been a part of their lives, I would not deprive them, because of our problems.
2006-11-07 05:40:27 · answer #9 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋