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My question is, Is it right? Would it make me feel better? Any experiences out there?

2006-11-07 05:13:26 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

21 answers

you should do her mother. That'll help make up for lost time.

2006-11-07 05:20:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 4

This is really funny.

If you couldn't handle sexual relationships before marriage, what makes you feel more 'qualified' now? You've had sex with one woman...you're hardly an expert.

Your entire motive is revenge..? Against the one woman who you have slept with?

Here's a clue- more than 95 percent of singles are not virgins when they marry. So, she's part of the 95 percent and you are part of the five percent.

We can't know if your virginity at marriage was a choice or not, but being vindictive against the woman you chose to marry cannot be a wise choice. If you wanted to explore life, the time to do so was when you were single. It may have opened your eyes a bit more to the world around you. It may have given you life experience and wisdom that you otherwise will never have.

It's called 'sowing your wild oats' and you had none to sow.

Guess what? You missed the boat.

And now, you're taking out that frustration on the one person you're closest to, because she did not miss the boat.

Consider this Einstein...she knows what it's like to sleep with other people...and she STILL chose you to marry.

I think she's quite an exceptional woman, and it'd be wise for you to drop this stupid excuse for not having fun while you could have. You should embrace this woman for looking past your ineptitude and thank her for giving an inexperienced man her heart.

2006-11-07 13:27:04 · answer #2 · answered by wrdsmth495 4 · 5 0

Are you saying your wife cheated on you before you were married? If that is the case, you need to talk to her about this, and regain the trust. If you are saying you were a virgin when you got married, and she was not, that is your problem. That does not give you the right to cheat on her. There is nothing wrong with having sex with someone if you are not in a relationship. I need more info. Did she betray you, or are you just upset that she has a more exciting past than you do?

2006-11-07 13:43:33 · answer #3 · answered by Bill 3 · 0 0


So, **before** you were married, your wife had experienced sex with others. And now, **after** you're married, you think you could justify your feelings of inadequacy by having an affair or two? Is that right? Did you understand my question here? Before you committed to her exclusively and after you committed to her exclusively.

I think you may have only two choices that will work for you, here.

1) You have the affairs and get a divorce because it's not fair to either of you if you are sexually unsatisfied.

2) You seek counseling for your feelings of inadequacy. If you are dissatisfied, that's one thing, but if you are really upset that she got something you don't have (sounds a bit like a 4th grader, doesn't it?), then you might benefit from outside assistance.

"jozzie" - you have an awesome answer. :-)

2006-11-07 13:23:23 · answer #4 · answered by stevegoryan 3 · 1 0

No its not right. You knew she had lovers before you and you accepted it. Its not right to back peddle now. No, cheating on your wife will not make you feel better nor will it improve your marriage, no matter how much you rationalize it.

My husband was a virgin when we married. He has expressed curiosity about what other women would be like. I will tell you what I told him, "Its different. Not good, not bad, just different."

2006-11-07 13:22:42 · answer #5 · answered by Poppet 7 · 1 0

That's stupid. She was with those guys before she got married and obviously she's been faithful to you since she got married. Why would you want to go out and deliberately hurt her b/c your ego is bruised? its not a big deal. And you'll feel like an idiot and your wife will hate you if you insist on getting even.

2006-11-07 13:18:31 · answer #6 · answered by Ms. G 3 · 4 0

Wait, you want to have sex with other men because your wife did and you didn't?

Okay, assuming this is a typo and you mean other women, why is it even an issue? If you feel cheated it is your issue not hers and you shouldn't make her suffer for it. And that isn't right.

2006-11-07 13:44:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

First of all, don't even go there because two wrongs won't make it right! Your wife was the one who has hurt you deeply and you didn't deserve it! You deserve to be loved, respected, honored, and accepted within the relationship! I think its best that you moved on with your life, because getting even with your wife will be bittersweet in the end! You deserve a lot better than that! Good luck!

2006-11-07 13:17:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1 2

if it was prior to meeting you what do you care she is your wife the one you should want to spend the rest of your life with and be happy not trying to get even in some way past is past move on and love and cherish every moment of it if you truly love her and she truly loves you you should sit down and talk and work things out never take love for granted

2006-11-07 13:25:18 · answer #9 · answered by zeus s 1 · 0 0

Getting even? For what? What an imature brat you sound like. Oh yeah, go and screw around on her and get even. Then she'll get even and divorce you and take half of everything you own. Then, you'll know how vengence feels.

2006-11-07 13:32:02 · answer #10 · answered by javelin 5 · 0 0

Don't be stupid! She had sex with other men before you got married, not while she was married. Just because you didn't get any before you said I DO that's not her fault

2006-11-07 13:46:28 · answer #11 · answered by freeatlastboone 3 · 1 0

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