I have no friends. What should I do?

Question

I'm gay. I'm 18. I'm Asian..have been stay in UK nearly 2 years..I'm in college now..

I have no friends to hang out with cuz my English is crap...I'm not very good at speaking and listening..I can't understand some people accent...and I'm afraid if I haven't got any English boyfriend...what should I do..? Am I not very confident about my english?

Answer 1

If you can write English as well as you have, then you can speak it. Go to English lessons at night school - it will also help you make new friends.

Answer 2

If you want a friend, be a friend. I'm sure there must be someone out there who would value your friendship. Maybe you're overlooking potential friends. Does someone have to look a certain way or dress a certain way to be your friend?

There are over sixty million people in the UK. Try joining an organization that addresses something that you're interested in. I understand your problem, though. I can be incredibly shy and self-conscious, and it's something I have to constantly battle. Some times it's very difficult for me to cope with it. But I don't really have a choice.

Most people won't expect your English to be perfect, by the way, and there are an awful lot of Asian immigrants in the UK. If someone gives you a hard time because of your accent, they're a jerk, and you wouldn't want them for a friend. Would you?

I agree with the other people. You managed to express yourself in English when you posted this message. I admire people who are able to learn other languages. I'm trying to learn a second language, and have been trying forever. I haven't given up yet, though.

Also, I've known people from Taiwan and from Vietnam who attended classes that were specifically designed to help people improve their accent. The guy from Taiwan told me that it was too much work, and that you have to practice every day, so he just decided to accept that he had a foreign accent. One of the Vietnamese guys ended up being an announcer/DJ at ballroom dance competitions. He had a very faint accent still, but accents can be interesting, in my opinion.


Good luck to you!

Answer 3

What you just wrote was not too bad. Well done! Go to an English speaking class in your area. There will be one if there are lots of immigrants there. Once you have brushed up on your English, smile, be friendly and confident, play sports, take part in activities, go to clubs and you will soon get noticed by the right people. Enjoy life. All the best x

Answer 4

There are gay groups you can go to. Stonewall might be able to help. Search on the internet. Maybe if you find interesting people you will find it easier to interact with them, and learn english faster. It is hard to learn english if you are isolated in a homophobic college. Maybe there is a gay group at the college you can join?

Good luck. And have confidence in your speaking. Talk clearly using words you know and you will pick up more phrases with time.

Answer 5

I think that you have realized your majore problem right in your question. Just learn English a little more. Get a Student Tutor or something that is young at school. You and that person might actually start becoming friends while he/she is giving you lessons on English. You probably are a good person and people want to get to know you but they just cant understand you but once you have that done you will have friends in no time.

Answer 6

well bone up on english, if it bothers you. but most people don't mind an accent, it's charming. is there a gay student group on campus? try joining it. if you're looking for a boyfriend there are lots of guys who find asians hot, you shouldn't have a problem at all. just stop being shy and afraid confidence is sexy. good luck!!

Answer 7

I think you just did the right thing,you reached out for someone without beeng pathetic.My heart goes out to you tonight and i truly hope and pray you soon will find that spesial someone.Hang in there,i promise you things will get better,little by little.Im from Norway and straight,living with my girlfriend so im afraid this is all i can do for you,but dont give up,life can be really great if you just hang on a little longer.God bless,my unknown friend.You can write me if you like,but i cant answer you until tomorrow.My email:
[e-mail]

Answer 8

there has to be an English class you could take to help you out with your English. You seem to be able to type English pretty good. Thats a sign that you could speak it with no problem. And as far as the boyfriend thing.......your in Europe, shouldnt be too hard. there are Gay clubs all over.

Answer 9

My family and I live in the states, and my grandparents adopted 6 kids from all over; two were from Korea, two were from the Phillippines, and the other two were from other states. Of those kids, my two uncles from the Phillippines were in their early teens when they were adopted and spoke little to no english whatsoever. But this has not at all been a problem for them to meet people. In fact, Chris, the oldest of the two, has the worst "broken English" of the pair, and anyone who has ever met him comments on his sense of humor and how easy he is to get along with, not about his language mastery. He has made more friends by just laughing, telling jokes, and doing his best to communicate. After all, if someone doesn't exactly understand what you say they will invariably ask you to repeat it, or ask, "What do you mean?", and a conversation is born. Many people are more tolerant than you might give them credit for, and as long as people see that you are genuinely interested in your efforts, that is what really matters. People communicate in many more ways than actual speech. They will be looking at your posture, the sincerity in your eyes and movements when you talk, and less so at your ability to perfectly dictate English. Try your best, listen to their response, and if you don't know what they mean, ask them for clarification because there is always more than one way to say exactly what you want to say, and somewhere in there you will be able to grasp the meaning well enough to guess at a response. If you are just wrong in your response, the most you will do is make them laugh, and believe me, they are not laughing at you, they are laughing because you are entertaining! That's all anyone's really after anyway is entertainment of some nature, and laughter is one of the Universal Languages. Play your strengths, and I say your strengths are in your very limited mastery of the English language. Don't listen to all those people telling you that it's your problem that you can't make friends, and you need to fix yourself somehow and they say you need to take English classes. They are not the people you would be able to count on that list of genuine friends, anyway. Trust me. Do your best, be sincere, and if you get stuck, rephrase the question or ask them how would they say or describe what you are trying to say. Take a chance! My uncle met some of the coolest people by just being himself, and doing the best that he could.

Answer 10

If you are Gay then try and find a gay club or pub in your area, sure there must be one as for the language my wife did not speak a word of English and I did not speak a word of French when we met but we got on a lot better then, once we understood each other we got divorced.

Answer 11

Cheer up, you've always got us online! If you feel you need to improve your english, ask people you meet for advice and ask them to explain anything you don't understand. Speak to your tutors and see if there are any clubs or courses for english as a second language students maybe. Then you could meet other people in the same situation.