5 years, three and 1/2 yr old daughter, yelling, abuse, I pay for everything even though he has a job? He manipulates....
2006-11-06 18:42:23 · 12 answers · asked by Jenny D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We are in a very same same situation..and its not easy to say leave cos it involved so many things including the kids! Take it as a challenge cos it will make u stronger!
Good luck honey, I have been in this situationfor 24 years and kids grown up still same abused!!!
2006-11-06 19:12:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you forgotten that you are an adult and you have choices?
What part of your history of your life makes it ok to be even spend 5 years with him? He manilupates you because you let him.
Make a plan. Change the locks on the doors. Move. Whatever you need to do to get him out of your life. Document every abuse.
Your daughter needs to have good memories of childhood, not nightmares.
It is better for a child to be from a broken home than to live in one.
If he is dangerous get a restraining order on him.
Otherwise pack up his stuff and leave it on the front poarch and tell him it is over and he needs to find another place to live.
This isn't all that hard. Just make a plan. You can do it.
2006-11-06 19:21:27 · answer #2 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Formulate your plan for independence and when ready, take the child and move out quick. Once away, call him and inform him of your decision and actions. Have the divorce papers served the next day and let the legal process take its course. In a few months it will all be over and chances are you'll get half of everything plus child support from him. You mention abuse...you may wish to inform your lawyer, the cops and the daycare of your situation with him. This way, if he tries anything crazy, everyone will know your story before it becomes your word against his. The key is to be smart and take control instead of letting existing circumstances manipulate your life.
2006-11-06 19:58:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have done the first step (congrats) in detecting the abuse and trying to find sources to get out of this relationship.
Now you have to realize that you need to act fast because you are not alone on this. You also have a child that needs your help and protection, she is depending on you.
There is also one positive in your question/statement and that is the fact that you seem financially stable. Instead of paying him, get yourself and your daughter away from him as possible and start a new life. It will be must cheaper paying for 2 people instead of 2 people and 1handicapped in the brain.
Good luck.
2006-11-06 18:59:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say if you have family in a different city (far, far, far away), go and move with them tell you get back on your feet. Nobody has to live with abuse. When you decide to get out of it, and stay out of it for good, you will find away. It might be hard, it might seem impossible right now, but you have to know you can do it. You just have to remember that no matter how hard it may seem to be on your own, in the end you and your daughter will be happier and healthier in the end without the abuse. I really hope you find the strength to take back your life. You deserve better.
2006-11-06 18:53:09 · answer #5 · answered by Danielle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What are you waiting for? Most men are good at manipulation, so recognize the manipulation and don't fall for it . Look deep into yourself and find whats the real reason you are still with him. If your are scared feel the fer and do it anyway . Only you are responsible for your own happiness. Your children deserve to be happy an know how to demand respect for themselves. Put their mental health first and get on with it
2006-11-06 21:04:42 · answer #6 · answered by dettie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Contact a Social Agency in your area, and ask specifically about shelter for abused women and children. Your whereabouts would be concealed, and you might be able to work through a third party for counselling if you're interested, or you may be able to subsist of your own.
While children are victims too, you'll have to remember he will press for his parental rights. I'd sure document abuse....
2006-11-06 18:53:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get counselling!! You are not only letting yourself get hurt , your kids are paying the price as well. Get familiar with yourself first - read Dr. Phil's relationship rescue - or if it's too far gone then decide what you have to do to move on, and then DO IT!!
2006-11-06 18:52:37 · answer #8 · answered by tamster 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave while he is at work find a friend you can stay with file for divorce it appears he is only taking advantage of you.
2006-11-06 19:23:51 · answer #9 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pack ;your stuff and go......Thats how you get out of it.......
Run for the hills and don't look back......
Is the daughter his? yours?....both of yours?
Either way.......LEAVE
2006-11-06 18:55:55 · answer #10 · answered by Lrn'dTheHardWay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋