Sticky situation here. I am in the process of a divorce. I ran into my former ex bf from 5 years ago and we hooked up. Here is where it gets sticky. His house burned down shortly after we fought about nothing. He moved in with his ex wife and it's been purely like roommates. His ex and I are like friends. So, we've been seeing each other for a while now. We made a mistake and went too far, from which I could be pregnant. He called me later on that day and said that he will do whatever I want, including moving in together. I think he's already started that, becuase he phoned me saying that his ex turned out to be jealous and that she had given him three weeks to move out. He wants this to go as smoothly as possible, so he asked me not to call for a couple of weeks to avoid any more trouble. I know for a fact they are not doing anything from knowing his ex so well and having gotten close. The three weeks thing, is he really working no getting out or is he running?
2006-11-06 17:00:22 · 5 answers · asked by Ding Dong 1 in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
I hope in the interim he is calling you.
I hate the fact that he is lying to her about you since he asked you not to call , that 's a crock, he may be trying to keep peace so he won't get thrown out sooner. still stinks.telling lies doesn't change the truth. it all comes out anyway.
He is your ex for a reason, don't forget that part, her ex too.
Are you sure you want to be so close to him if you are pregnant?
Why the heck doesn't he have a cell phone? She is feeling awfully possesive of him if there is trouble because of him seeing you if she is not into him again. He seems to be keeping his doors open just in case..........
Whatever the reasons , I don't care for the secrets, why do things at all if you feel you are not secure enough to stand by what you do. bad character trait and it's a trait that doesn't disappear over night ,if at all. I'd either call or stop by since they are both your friends and level with them both .Get it right out in the open now, or let it(him) go.
2006-11-06 19:02:30 · answer #1 · answered by 2K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not a "sticky situation". Its a mess. Really, people who are in the process of getting divorces or who are living with ex-wives because of burned down houses ought to just "cool it" for a while when it comes to getting too involved with anyone else.
You said "could be pregnant", so there's the chance you aren't. That's good. You called it "made a mistake". This isn't a mistake. This is doing what you felt like doing in spite of its having the possibility of creating more of a mess
You may want to see a "warning flag" about the "ex" getting jealous; because if she had no interest in him at all she wouldn't be jealous - so that's yet more potential for mess.
The fact that you and his ex-wife are friends is yet one more thing that contributes to a mess. It would just be better if you weren't with someone who was linked to your friend. That, by itself, is almost reason you should have just stayed away from this guy.
Having said all that, I don't necessarily think he's running. He probably doesn't want conflict while he's in her house because of "the goodness of her heart".
2006-11-07 01:54:34 · answer #2 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shannon, I would encourage a friend in the process of a divorce to take some time before getting involved in another relationship --at least until the divorce is finalized. Give yourself time to find out who you are on your own, at this time in your life -- to know what YOU want from life before you are concerned about what someone else wants of you. Chances are you have some raw edges that make you vulnerable, easily involved and easily hurt. (The "fight about nothing" might be an indication of that.)
Time will tell you if your ex bf is ready to connect... so give it time. If you are pregnant, get emotional and practical support and don't make a rash decision you will regret later.
2006-11-07 01:27:43 · answer #3 · answered by Coriander 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I hate to put the damper on things but surely he could figure out a way to call you!?! If you are having feelings that something isn't right in Kansas, there is most likely something behind it. Pay attention to it. that's your subconscious warning signals going off. Move forward carefully, You may find you need to take a detour! Good luck!
2006-11-07 01:15:43 · answer #4 · answered by Carolyn T 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this involves male and female broken hearts, most divorcees report that it takes at lest 6 months to heal. I would argue that men hold the pain longer and have a harder time getting over it as we are less emotionally intelligent.
2006-11-07 01:09:06 · answer #5 · answered by johnmba 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋