Recently divorced and was not my choice, I seem to be in a funk. Never really wanting to leave the house and seems the last thing I want to do is see any mutual friends. I'm still hurt and to make things worse he seems to be just fine.
2006-11-06 13:48:58 · 6 answers · asked by Octavia 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm sorry you're blue. Just try to keep busy doing things you like, or focus on a project or hobby. Although you don't want to, try to get out of the house, it really will help you to forget your blues.
2006-11-06 13:52:46 · answer #1 · answered by T Time 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your still hurt,and it takes awhile, sometimes we just have to force ourselves out, it does hurt that he appears to be happy, and enjoying his life when we are so hurt. find a friend someone who has experienced the pain u are now going through, and talk to them. u can't get through this alone. at first it seems as if it's the end of the world, it is the death of our marriage, our safety and security as we once knew it, we fear the unknown, seems like everyone is fine, and to us life is not even real. seems like a bad dream we wish we could wake up from. got to make yourself go places, meet new friends, and stay as far away from him, and anyone u and he use to be friends with. wish i could say the pain will end tomorrow, but it has taken me 3 years to finally realiaze that it was the best thing for me. we try to figure out what went wrong, we go back and forth first blaming ourselves, and than him, but u know there was little we could do about it, even had we been perfect. we will never know the complete truth, or if he also feels hurt, because men hide their feeling's and pretend to be ok with it. when i couldn't get through it, i for the first time in this life, turned to god, and it did help me after awhile. u have to get out, u have to force yourself to do the things you use to enjoy, can't let him have total control. divorce isn't the end of life, although it seems like it for awhile. the pain is like a process we go through, eventually we come to accept it, and think about it less as time goes by. don't let him see your sadness, or hurt, let him think u are just fine with it. we have to stop expecting anything from the ex, ever, not even an apology for hurting us. when we don't get over it, it is usually us wanting him to be sorry he hurt us, and in feeling this way it actually keeps us from getting better, or from moving on.good luck, know that this happens to alot of us, sometimes other peoples choices devistate our lives, and we get a hurt we did not deserve, but it isn't the hurt that is so important , it's how u deal with it, and what u choose to do next. why let a man who broke your heart have so much control over your feeling's.
2006-11-06 22:15:17 · answer #2 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keeping yourself busy or hanging out with someone who understands how you feel is the best solution. Even if it doesn't seem like it now time does heel all wounds. Good Luck
2006-11-06 21:54:50 · answer #3 · answered by Cruella 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't let his comfort with the situation define your happiness. Why don't you volunteer somewhere and meet some new friends? It sure beats watching TV or surfing the net.
2006-11-06 21:51:30 · answer #4 · answered by Senor Pig 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
start a list of all the things you wanted to do and couldn't do with him.
start walking, jogging, writing, listening to music(happy), travel, get out of the house or it will become to familiar.
make new friends.
2006-11-06 21:56:14 · answer #5 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try going to church and prying about it your friends could help good luck.
2006-11-06 21:52:31 · answer #6 · answered by ELIZABETH A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋