Is this harrassment? what would you do?

Question

i work in a bar and i ve been there for almost a year now. my uniform is a pink dress (really short) with slits on the sides and nude pantyhose. everyday i have guyz looking up my dress and touching my leg. i get tips and i need to money so i didn't quite the job and just put up with them.

Now i think they have gone a bit too far. one group of guyz about 6 of them, spilled like some beer on me. i wasn't an accident because all of them grabbed hold on me and pretended to wipe. No, they were running their hands through my legs and splitting them. some of them grabbed my dress since its so short, it went all the way up. hella other guys were looking. dang. i had a tray of drinks in my other hand and i cant move. i had to stay there for like a few minutes. and like their hands all went under my dress and touched me in the wrong places. What would you do?

Answer 1

It's quite a difficult job you have there, looking sexy seems to be part of it and that the guys feel provoked is no surprise. That some under the influence of alcohol can't behave...not a surprise either.

My reaction therefore would have been very clear, professional and emotionless. I would have asked every single one of those guys in this moment to take their hands off while looking them directly into their eyes, speaking with a slow and deepest voice I had. Now - I have a different result perhaps because I am tall and athletic and can talk loud, slow and strong and guys kind of show easily respect when I ask them - whatever my outfit is in this moment.

Not sure whether this would work for you. Depends on your general charisma and appearance.

But then there is also the bouncer - just for situations like this.

Well - and then if I really need the money badly - I would have probably said something ironic/funny to get more tips out of them after it happen end and once they had their hands off. Something which also would have made them feel guilty and ashamed.

Difficult really.

Answer 2

Okay girlfriend, here we go...

ONE - Regardless of your job position, your economical status, education, religion, color of your skin, ethnicity, or otherwise... YOU SHOULD NEVER BE SUBJECTED TO THAT TYPE OF TREATMENT BY ANYONE!!!

TWO - Did your manager or boss see this? Did you complain about it to her/him? Did you complain to and/or told the bartender - what happened. (I really hope you did). Most state laws require the bartender to stop distribution to patrons if they harrass an employee. If nothing was done about it, (as in having the patrons removed from the premises), you've got a nice lawsuit!

THREE - It's a basic sexual harassment / quality of life suit. Obviously you felt threatened by these men.

FOUR - Do you have any reliable witnesses that could testify on your behalf? By reliable, I mean non-drug users, non-ex-fellons, etc... but upstanding citizens in the community, good friends and family who have never been convicted of anything, etc...

FIVE - ABOVE ALL - If you do bring a lawsuit against either your attackers or the bar, DO NOT TELL ONE SINGLE LIE. They will find out, maybe not immediately, but definitely eventually.

SIX - I've only dated a few lawyers and from all creeds. From the slimy-snakes you love-to-hate, to the heros you see on the front page, to the behind-the-scenes person who brings it all together.

I am not, nor ever - will be a lawyer, but they've taught me well without knowing they did. I'm just a humble artist/musician/poet, etc... who only wants justice in this world and happen to have an excellent memory as well as exceptional hearing.

Please feel free to contact me if you like.

Answer 3

Girl, NO ONE NEEDS A JOB THAT BAD.

You work with your arms --- serving drinks, pouring drinks, handling money, giving change... etc. You may be required to smile, you may be required to not offend anybody, but you AREN'T required to let every loser cop a cheap feel. I know it may not pay enough, but if you value your dignity and don't want to get jumped in the parking lot at some point when you're trying to go home, QUIT the damn bar and look for another job. If you have to, find two jobs to fill out the day and the amount of money you need to get by ---- but for crying out loud, QUIT.

Answer 4

Well, I would be getting a better job and some education to enable me to make better money.
If this is a joke question then I would of landed the tray of drinks on their pointed little things.

Answer 5

There are a lot more respectable "server" jobs that are available; Applebee's, Red Lobster, etc. They will not require you to serve a bunch of drunk guys wearing little or nothing at all. The tips may vary but the self respect will be there.

Answer 6

You need to tell your boss/manager what happened, and describe the people who did this. You could even press charges. Maybe this would be a good time for you to ask for a change of uniform. NOT that that condones what they did in anyway! You could be walking around naked, and they still don't have the right to grope you.

Answer 7

You should talk with your boss to hire some warden in this bar and to kick those guys out if it looks like it is going to happen again. You don't need to stand this for money nor for the "image" of the bar and no boss has a right to force you to stand it.

Answer 8

Obviously, those jerks made you feel uncomfortable, so it was wrong for them to do. I would say it was definetly harrassment. I would have told them to get their hands off of me, and I would of had my manager kick them out. There is no reason for you to get violated like that at work. The customers pay you to serve them, they don't pay you to so they can put their hands all over you. You should have stood up for yourself.

Answer 9

Empty the drinks over their heads. They sound like real creeps. Doesn't your boss protect you? Touching someone without that person's permission is assault. You could bring charges against them.

Answer 10

it particularly is an previous comedian tale even though it particularly is sexual harassment. The definition is that this..in case you're having or getting undesirable comments or movements approximately areas of the physique or habit that makes you sense uncomfortable the regulation says it particularly is harassment. i think of your supervisor is likewise interior the incorrect, the two report a complaint or bypass to the supervisors boss. the only different subject is to permit it bypass. you ought to have your brother, father or guy pal are available and p.c.. you up from artwork and supply the guy mad dogs seems or talk to him quietly with reference to the movements.