Embarrassing sex question?

Question

Since Ive had kids, my husband says that Im to lose and it effects his ablitiy to have an orgasm. He wants me to get Surgery??? Is there a remady?
Not only do I have that problem, but I also have no sex drive what so ever. Dose any one know any options?

Answer 1

I have to agree with everyone on this one. When you have a baby, that is a natural occurance, your vagina bounce back to normal, however it does take a full year to get back. Sex too soon can make you have future health problems. I am only 110lbs, 3 babies natural, and all was over 8 lbs and 22 inches. I worried about my area being blew out, and my OBGYN told me exactly what I just told you. Sex starts w/you, you have to feel sexy and it's hard being a new mom. I am always tired, and busy with the kids. The hubby, is tired from working, so the sex life goes out the window. From experience, just plan ahead, I try to get everybody ready the night before to help release stress the next day and possible relax me for the night to enjoy my husband "sexually". It's a lot of work on both ends. Good luck

Answer 2

I'm sorry to hear that. I'm a mom of a 8.5 and 10.5 year old I'm 32.5 weeks pregnant. I have found in pregnancy i seem less tight i think it's actually a issue of being to wet. Having sex doggy style helps a LOT to make things feel more snug. As for the no sex drive that may be coming from his lack or getting you excited. Having children should not have that much of a noticeable effect on your muscle control. I found SEX better after my 1st child i have never even had a orgasm until after his birth.however It seems to be a issue for you and you do need it addressed sexual problems lead to martial issues. Do not be ashamed to ask your GYN they would be the best at giving advice or treatment. He may just be "too small" it could acually be HIS issue not yours at all. If he is too small i'm sure you have no sex drive because it is not pleasurable to you so WHY even do it.

Answer 3

personally i think his head is in the wrong place for him not able to get an orgasm..maybe try stirring up somethings....have a night out or something he is not expecting....because i dont think it is your problem....he might have a prob. of his own that he cant get out of his or maybe he needs some male enhancements or something....also, there are these exercises called kegels basically all you do is squeeze you muscles down there....and hold for a few seconds and do this when ever you want....you can do it anywhere without anyone knowing....it is reallly works and you can also squeeze when he is inside.....but i would take him out of the norm first and see what happens....cause i think he has a prob not you....and dont do any surgery...you have an exercise to use and try...also, i know where you are coming from to have no sex drive....after i had my last kid it took me a while to get back in the groove of things....trying doing something sexy....the newest thing is pole dancing...in your own house or exercising to stimulate your mind in being sexy and in having a good body or i would try to think about sex and try something that interests you...when is the last time you have done something for you. ...good luck....think outside the box....

Answer 4

You are lacking sex drive because of his constant complaining. He's saying he is not being pleased is affecting you more than he realizes. As far as you not being as tight as you were before the children, try Kegel exercises. If you are not sure about how they are done. Go to a women's sight and look it up. Don't do the surgery thing. If he loved how you felt before considering you bared his kids he should really love you now.

Answer 5

Sometimes when you have children you do have less sensitivity in that area. As far as you being looser then you were? I have never heard of that. As far as surgery, that should be your choice not because your husband says he can't feel you. I would see a doctor (OBGYN) about your ability to have a healthy sex drive as far as the loose part...I would talk to the other kind of doctor like a cosmetic surgeon for that but that is a decision you have to make for yourself not for him. I hope that helps and good luck.

Answer 6

there are other options, such as simply exercising those particular muscles, its called kegal exercises.

Kegel exercises (Kegels) are exercises designed to strengthen the muscles of the lower pelvic girdle, or pelvic floor—the pubococcygeal (PC) muscles. The PC muscles support the bladder, urethra, and urethral sphincter—the muscle group at the neck of the bladder that acts as a spigot for controlling urine flow into the urethra—and the vagina, uterus, and rectum. Anything that puts pressure on the abdomen can weaken or damage these pelvic muscles. Such conditions include pregnancy, childbirth, excess weight, hormonal changes, and aging. Kegel exercises enable the PC muscles to better withstand increases in intra-abdominal pressure (pressure inside the abdomen). They make the bladder, urethra, and vagina more resilient, and improve bladder control and sexual relations.

Practicing Kegels

There are numerous suggestions for practicing Kegels, which include:

* Contracting the PC muscles for three to 10 seconds and relaxing them three to 10 seconds for five to 15 repetitions, three to 12 times per day.
* Contracting the PC muscles strongly for one second, then releasing for one second, 20 times, three times per day, speeding up the contractions until there is a fluttery sensation.
* While emptying the bladder, stopping the urine flow at least three seconds, 10 times during each urination, which provides 60–80 contractions per day

Answer 7

i have seen this on DR Drew show, there are a few simple surgical treatment that can fix the size issue, as far as the drive issue you may need to seek out this with your own Dr. it may be as simply as hormones, or the words of your husband bouncing around in your head every time he asks for your loving. either way he has no size problems of his own? or maybe you need to tell him you'll do a "in-depth" study on this with real subjects, he may change his way of thinking and talking. check out his web site and shoot him an e-mail regarding this matter, hell be the one with the answers you need, or if you live close to an big city you may find a Dr. that does this kind of "work". good luck with what ever you find out.

Answer 8

Try working out that area. If you can stop yourself from peeing you can work out it. It will tone and strengthen it. You will be able to do amazing things with that new muscle drives men insane.
On the other note, you should tell him you wouldn't be soo losse feeling if he wasn't so small.
Sex drive increase, well really you have to feel good about yourself, your relationship and sexually. Perhaps if he tried more things or got you aroused your sex drive wouldn't be so low.

Answer 9

well...there is something called dettol!! its european.. ( i am from european descent) and women use it as a vaginal cleaner instead of soap! it is anesthetic..and is does burn!! so when it burns don't be afraid thats just it working!! and the burn is also the dettol shrinking your vagina in a little..i don't know how much it will shrink in but it does shrink it some!!! you can google the product and find it online! other than that theres always the "virgin again" surgery...they stitch you up down there and make the hole smaller..BUT then your husband still has to wait for sex! until you heal!! well good luck!

Answer 10

Tell him that his penis is too small and that it affects your ability to have an orgasm; tell him to get an operation or something to fix it.

Your husband is a selfish, inconsiderate loser who is more concerned with getting his rocks off than the well-being of his spouse. Deal with him as you wish; as a husband of 17yrs with 3 kids, I'm appalled.