Is 5 years too long, especially since we are saving sex for marriage? We're both 19 and have dated for more than a year, and got engaged recently... We talked about waiting until a year after we graduate to get married... Please give me how long it was for you, and what you think of our plan. Thanks!
2006-11-06 10:30:39 · 26 answers · asked by reba 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your plan is very good. I wished more people thought on those lines. Since you are have accepted the engagement. There is 6 months of counseling with your minister. Or a minister that you are very confident that he or she will lead you (both) into a relationship with your creator (God) first. After the six months you will know if the both of you are ready for each other. Marriage is a covenant between the both of you and God. It is a promise. It is commitment. God Bless You two
2006-11-06 10:37:49 · answer #1 · answered by Ucan2 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My two cents...wait until you graduate. It will be hard enough to be in a marriage, much less be in school as well. Too be honest, a year is too soon to get married. Usually, people do not get to know each other completely until 2-3 years. By then, you have both shared some relationship challenges together. Right now you both could be still in the "honeymoon" stage. Plus, you are both really young so why rush? If you love each other, how could waiting hurt, but only make it more worth it and special? Ultimately, you have to go with what you feel is right for you. I hope whatever you choose, you are both happy! Cheers and Congrats!
2006-11-06 10:42:41 · answer #2 · answered by sunflwr528ia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I was 19 I dated a guy for a year before getting engaged and another year before we were married. That lasted 20 years until we divorced.
Currently my man and I dated two weeks before getting engaged and a total of 3 months before getting married. Things went a little faster since we have both been married before and knew what we were looking for in a mate.
2006-11-06 10:34:29 · answer #3 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I was 18 when I started dating my now husband, we got engaged after only 3 weeks and married 4 months later. Proud to say we've been married 2 years now. I would wait until after you graduate, it'll make life much easier for the both of you.
2006-11-06 10:36:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
waiting is really good. my love and I were friends a year before we started dating, then he proposed about a year in a half later. we have been engaged for 2 years. kinda long, but we want a nice wedding, so were saving lots of money for that. so wev'e been together about 4 years. Why would 5 years be too long? If you can't be together without being married, maybe you shouldn't. My love and I may not be legally married, but mentally and physicly we are.
2006-11-06 10:38:27 · answer #5 · answered by mistalina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I dated 4 months before getting engaged but waited 2 years for the wedding. I wanted to finish my bachelors degree before I got marred, and then i still waited a year. We have been married 2 years now.. I would say wait till you finish school.
2006-11-06 10:40:16 · answer #6 · answered by chellie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, whatever we say here shouldn't matter. It's when you guys are ready! My hubby and I dated 7 months and got engaged. From there, we got married 18 months later. However, I was a single mom when we met and at the wedding we were 25 and 29, have our degrees BS/Masters, had a home, savings, minimal debt.....
Those are ALL things you have to think about!!!!!! And there is no "time" limit on when it's right for the two of you.
2006-11-06 10:34:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No. My ex & I were together for five years before we got married. We were married 7 months. Then BAM, the day after Christmas he left me. No explaination, no NOTHING!! I think your plan is a good one. Gives you both a chance to grow up a little. You should experience life a little more though. But just go with what feels right to YOU, not whats right for the other person. YOU!
2006-11-06 11:02:50 · answer #8 · answered by Kathi E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First marriage:
Got engaged 2 mos after beginning dating...got married 1 yr after beginning dating.
Second marriage:
Got engaged nearly 2 yrs after beginning (dating) I think...got married a few mos later.
What y'all decide is up to you...if you want to wait until after college that's great because you'll both go through a lot of changes during that time, and there's even the chance that you'll find you aren't the good match that you were prior to college.
Don't do it until you are ready...no matter how long it takes...it's your life/lives...not anyone elses...
2006-11-06 10:35:38 · answer #9 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I started dating in Jan. of last year, moved in together that May, got engaged a year later (May of this year), and got married in Sepember. We're in our 30s, and I'd been married before.
I would say, five years of "dating" at such young age without bringing sex into the picture is probably unrealistic. IMHO, it would be an idealistic mistake to think that a mature adult relationship between a man and a woman could grow and develop for such a long period of time without a crucial ingredient missing. Sex is by far NOT the *main* part of a serious relationship. But is *is* an important part, there's no getting away from it. In an ideal relationship, sexual and emotional closeness develop in tandem, and are inseparable. There's nothing wrong with "waiting until marriage" if this is what your beliefs are; I just think that waiting five years would be way too long, and it may bring down what otherwise would have been a good relationship.
2006-11-06 10:58:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋