I have a boyfriend ...?

Question

I have a boyfriend who is a heroin addict, it absolute devastates me. We have one child together and one that I had before that who is like his child...8 years jails, detoxes, programs and alot of happiness but alot of sadness. When he's good hes the best, when hes bad he's bad... He has never hit me stolen from me or been mean to the kids its just that emotionally I am exhausted, I understand its a disease, I stopped shooting heroin a year ago, I almost lost my kids and died, reality check, so i know about heroin dependancy, what i dont understand is when is he going to hit bottom and realize how much I love him. I am sorry I just need help, I dont know whether to leave him or not. Im afraid he will kill himself if we are not in his life. Honest answers what can I do.?? See crying now :(

Answer 1

Sorry...Drugs will always win. Some may call it a disease but not getting help is a choice. If he's not in rehab, he's not trying to quit. Physical abuse is not the only reason to leave someone. Mental and emotional abuse is worse because those bruises don't heal as fast...(if ever). You need to do what's best for your kids and move on. Would you approve for your kids to be in your situation? By staying, you are indirectly teaching your kids that this is what a relationship is supposed to be.
Whatever he chooses to do with his life, (even if it's ending it), IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT. It would be HIS choice. It's not fair to put that kind of pressure on you. You have to be able to take care of your kids and you can't do that if he is emotionally draining you.
Be strong, good luck

Answer 2

You know how u said reality check for u, as hard as i may seem if u left maybe it would be his reality check, if he loves u {and only u know that answer} As much as it hurts u it will hurt him. If he sees u and the kids are gone than he might realize how much he is hurting u guys and he might stop {HOPEFULLY} It would be hard to leave him but if it would help him in the long run it would benfit and would do more good than pain. But u have to be strong enough to do it!!! And if it helped u leaving 4 him to clean up then the hurt would be worht it. {Good luck}

Answer 3

You are what's keeping him from hitting bottom so as hard as it may seem, you have to stop enabling.
I don't know how many programs he or you have been to but it can't hurt to try a different one. I've seen them fail and I've seen them work, but it still the best option. The further away from home the better.
Good Luck

Answer 4

It is also worrying for you, however your mother is most effective protective you and does no longer desire something to occur to you. Age change does no longer topic she's going to continuously expect a man is to historical for you for the reason that you're her daughter. And sure your mother can have met your father the identical time you met yours and your mother quite often made a few errors that she simply does no longer desire repeated to you. Just pay attention to her for the reason that eventually if some thing does occur to you, you'll suppose dangerous for no longer listening and you'll remorse the results.

Answer 5

Congratulations of being clean for a year, it is a great accomplishment. Your bf has not yet hit bottom, he still has you and the kids, a place to stay and food for his belly. I imagine you are still seeing your doctor/therapist, talk to them. Your doctor can explain about how you enable him to continue. Sometimes the only way to help someone is to cut them loose and hope they find their way back to you.

Answer 6

Definitely stop enabling him. You can't hit rock bottom if everything's handed to you. It's not easy, but tough love is what he has to get.

Answer 7

you need to do whats best for you and your kids.he's and adult if he wants help he can get it you cant make him it's all on him.i'm sorry you have to go threw this..we as adults are accoutable for our own actions...

Answer 8

dump the loser///