Looking for ideas, my daughter almost 17yrs.old, took my car while I was out of my home. Drove and without a license and crashed. No injures, major damage to vehicle. Any ideas on punishment besides the usual no phone and no computer...
2006-11-06 07:03:00 · 23 answers · asked by jpf 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
What do the phone and computer have to do with driving without a licence and damaging property of others. And she probably didn't have insurance either.
First, never leave your car keys lying around for ttemptation to strike the teens who are home alone. They won't all run off with the car but why put temptation right under their noses.
Second, there is cost to repair the vehicle and if the insurance company finds out, your premiums are going up. Since she decided to take the car and drive it, she has to be responsible for her actions. Yea I know you want to punish but far better to require that she accept full responsiblility for what she did and bear the cost.
Third, no driving anyone's car or truck or any other motorized vehicle until she passes a full driving course (not just some flaky 'get a licence quick' course but a real intensive one. Plus she pays for the course and if and when she gets a licence, she shares the cost of insurance, gas, repairs, etc for your car or she gets one of her own and pays all the bills.
And until she starts paying you back all she is allowed to do, aside from finding and working at a job, it go to school and study. Once she is working and paying, then she can maintain schoolwork and resume whatever social life she had before providing school and paying off her debt are kept up with.
None of it is really punishment; merely requiring that she grow up and be a responsible person.
Oh, and I might suggest she start going to church every siunday and give prayers of thanks that no one was hurt or killed through her actions.
And in case she has some idea you won;t notice if she rep[eats the dumb moves, inform here politely that next time she will deal with the police first on the no licence and no insurance issue then the persons whose property she damages.
2006-11-06 07:18:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She absolutely needs to get a job and pay for the damages. Not just part of it, but the full amount. Don't give her money for ANYTHING until her debt to you is paid off. If she usually buys lunch at school, make her brown bag it. If she crashed the car at a park or something, have her volunteer there for like 6 months. Taking away priveledges is a great form of punishment, but this is too serious for that. She needs to FEEL the consequences of her choice. I don't think it would be a bad idea to call the police, have them talk to her. Don't press charges now, but if it happens again, then I would. I'm glad no one got hurt :) My brother did the same thing to my mom a couple years ago when she was in the hospital recovering from knee surgery.
2006-11-06 15:17:06 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Omg. There are a lot of things you could do depending on your overall situation. Is she still in high school? Is she planning to go to college? Is she working? Were you able to use your insurance to pay for the damages or are you going to cover the cost yourself since she was driving without a license?
No phone and no computer barely scrapes the top of the punishment, in my opinion.
I would make HER pay for the repairs. By whatever means you have available - if she's working, make her give you a certain amount out of each paycheck, if you're supporting her with an allowance, etc., cut it by 75%, if you're paying for her college, make her get a job to reimburse you or use the "college" money for it.
Depending on your history with her, and what types of difficulties she's gotten into in the past, you might want to turn her in for stealing the car. Scared straight, you know?
Good luck to you!
2006-11-06 15:09:00 · answer #3 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that were my car then 1) she'd be getting a job and paying me back IN FULL and 2) she could forget about getting her license at any time before moving out of my home. Then explain that in order to get your trust back from you, she'll need to show you she is planning on being responsible, honest, and not a thief.
2006-11-06 15:18:19 · answer #4 · answered by GirlinNB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YEAH
make her get a job, and you get ALL her money until she pays you back for the damage.
Tell her the next time she steals your car and drives without a LICENSE you will call the COPS and have her arrested. Actually, I would do that to her right now - because that is exactly what she did.
2006-11-06 15:05:35 · answer #5 · answered by KB 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I sure am glad I bought my own car by that age!! My mom would have snatched me bald. I would get articles of kids around her age who have ruined lives by doing things like she did, and make her do household chores to repay the damage, unless she has a job. Then make her give you some money out of each check.By the way, who else was involved? I don't think she took your car to go out to the beach alone........
2006-11-06 15:19:30 · answer #6 · answered by me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make her get a job and pay for the damages(seriously). Teach responsibilty so that when she older she already know the price of being careless with a vehicle. the phone thing want work either, if your not home when shes home.
2006-11-06 15:10:54 · answer #7 · answered by NEVAM8DHONORLL 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was there a Police report,maybe she doesn't need to ever drive.Were you sued ,was there anyone else in the Car.I hope you still trust her after she almost wrecked everything you ever worked for.I hope the punishment ,is not a slap on the wrist.Maybe the juvenile authorities can help you,it sound criminal to me.
2006-11-06 15:12:32 · answer #8 · answered by Rather be dead than red... 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No going out, take everything possible that she likes (her makeup, glam clothes, etc.) just leave her with the basics and make her do some community service for about 6 months.....cleaning up the park, working with the elderly, children, fundraiser.......she may just get more than a punishment out of it.
Hope no one was hurt....good luck!
2006-11-06 15:07:35 · answer #9 · answered by teaspoon520 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she has to pay for the damages, cannot get a license untill she is legally an adult, and must attend drivers ed. Also she needs to write a letter of apology to all those influenced by her actions. In my opinion she's very lucky you didn't bring legal charges against her for autotheft
2006-11-06 15:06:14 · answer #10 · answered by University Girl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋