i never see my husbend because of work?

Question

my husband has just started a new job and now because our hours clash i never see him because he works nights and i work through the day.Im pregnant and feel like im on my own with it now i didnt see him at all last week and its going to be the same until he quits which will never happen but i dont want to ask him to change his hours because id just feel bad since this is his dreem job and hes worked so hard to get it.HELP what should i do????

Answer 1

It's hard, I know...

My S.O. works a hard, demanding job with many long hours in the office plus a nearly two-hour commute -- each way.

This week they have many extra responsibilities and duties which require they spend even more time in the office and continue to work after hours over dinners with visiting foreign company workers, and it will be that way through the next two weeks.

More -- my S.O. is on the other side of the world!!! We're on opposite clocks all the time regardless of the work situation!

So, what was already difficult in terms of finding time for each other just got even more difficult. After a 14-16 hour day, there is precious little time left even for rest, let alone spending any real "quality" time together, or any time at all!!!

So, we spend time together when we can (never enough) and are often saddened and even sometimes frustrated when we miss any time we might have had, due to circumstance... usually due to fatigue.

I can only tell you that which you already know .. you love him and you want to be with him always, and you hate being apart. And, so does he.

Make the most of the time you have together, and use the time apart to think of what you will do when you are together.

I hope you two will find your way to a better situation sooner than sooner... and as important as the job is, try to let him know that you are there for him, but also that you need him (which of course, he knows, after all, he loves you just as you love him.)

And remember --

Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

and...

Love is not a matter of counting the moments... but making the moments count...

and...

Your love will only burn all the stronger for the time spent apart ---

"Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and blows up the bonfire."

If one of you is able to move into a different work situation, then more power to you. If not, and I suspect this is the case, then hold on and resolve together to make it your goals to get back on the same schedules as soon as possible.

My heartfelt best wishes to you two!

Answer 2

well I don't know what dream job keeps you from your family

I used to have a high paying tech job that required me to work weekends and nights and be on call all the time but I decided that money wasn't worth everything . . I quit when I had my 1st son and stayed home with my two sons for 10yrs me and my husband were able to spend plenty of time together cause even when he had to work weekends or nights I was home when he was. . .we both work now but when I hired in I explained I could only work 8:30 to 4:00 m-f because I have a family so far my boss has never asked me to work extra cause she knows where my values are.

Answer 3

Angel,
I used to work 16 hour days a few years ago and yes it was tuff on our marriage, but this did change after a few years and things got a lot better. Angel your situation will change also, it may take a while, but things always change in time. The bills have to be paid and this is what he wants to do for a living, so respect his decision and down the road things will get better.
TDCWH

Answer 4

i am married and have been in the same situation. i understand exactly how you feel. things happened in my life that changed everything about me and the way that i think. my husband owned his own business. it was his dream job. i supported him every inch of the way until things got ugly. he did some horrible things that most people could not forgive. i turned to god and he changed me and my life. i know now that it takes two in a marriage not one and there are dreams that i gave up for my family. i realized that i was not put here to do what i wanted to do. i was put here to do what god needed me to do. also, maybe you could both keep little journals and all through out the day whatever is going on no matter what it is you could communicate that way.

Answer 5

I'm going through the same thing with my husband and I'm pregnant with our second. Neither one of us can give up or change the circumstances of our jobs and so I'm in the position of just having to deal with it, even though its a lousy situation. Cooking and taking care of our other child obviously has to be done, so I concentrate on that - cleaning gets done when I can manage and I just don't worry about it. I'm trying to find a "single mothers' "group in my area to contact for support when I need it. Maybe something like this would be helpful to you? Just do the best you can and don't be afraid to ask for help and support from family, friends or whatever group you can find. Its really up to you to help yourself. Good luck.

Answer 6

His dream job is working nights away from you and your baby? That's weird! All I know is that sometimes you have to make sacrfices bigger than yourself and sometimes you have to just turn around and say to him "Honey, I understand that this job is your life but I need more support. I feel alone and I shouldn't feel that way carrying our first baby together. We need to work out a compromise" If he truly loves you, he'll work something out. You'll be ok. You married him for a reason, right?

Answer 7

Love doesn't pay the bills. You've got to get over it. Things will get better with time. You just never want to nag a working man. Be happy that you have a man who will work, there's a lot of sorry bastards out there these days.

Answer 8

my parents are the same thing ! they are always not home !!!!!!!!!!!! you know it is so depresing going home and nobody waits ! i totaly agree that jobs like this sucks ! there is a woman who helped me a lot since then and her email is [e-mail]
she might help you too. she is some sort of internet physiatris or something and helps people for free.
but whatever...i hope your husband will be back to you soon ! good luck !

Answer 9

"Life" comes first which means him being home to be part of a relationship. NO job is worth never seeing each other

Answer 10

use phone text to communicate when ya'll apart or other mobile texting (pic,aud,vid). And SUPPORT his dream and enjoy his focus on life. Get Rich