This question is a little open so let me explain. I am 22 and in college my boyfriend is 25 and works a decent job. He and i plan on marrying someday but we don't want to rush into it. I recently got off the pill and hope to be pregnant soon. My boyfriend thinks we shouldn't tell anyone that though, he thinks that if i get pregnant it would be more appropriate to tell everyone it was an accident. I find this odd, but true. That if you tell people, that you are young, unmarried, and yes poor and are planning to have a child they think your foolish. Yet if you have one accidentaly that is okay because you are young and poor and according to most probably not too bright. To me if i have thought about the consequences and the hardships of having a child, and plan to work hard and raise it to the best of my ability that is what should matter. Yet society frowns upon this. Should only middle class, and married people have children? Why are accidents considered more acceptable?
2006-11-06 06:02:19 · 5 answers · asked by TR 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I don;t understand people in day and age, where they still believe that you MUST be married in order to have children. If you are responsible and you have thought everything through, it should be your choice if its acceptable or not to have a child. If you are already strapped for cash though, I would wait a little. At least until you are financially stable - at least a little more than you are now. I wouldn't tell people it was an accident. It's your choice. It's an important choice and why not share with everybody, the joys of trying to have a child. Who cares if they say that it's foolish. Only one knows what is right for them. But, think long and hard about what kind of life you will be giving that child. A marriage certificate will not make it easier or harder for that matter in raising a child. Follow your heart. Think about the responsibilities - both physically - mentally- emotionally and FINANCially. You don't have to be rich to have a child, however, yif you barely get by on your own, how can you provide the bare necessities for a new born child.
Go with what you think is best and never mind the rest
2006-11-06 06:11:11 · answer #1 · answered by MomOf2Girls 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your only 22, still in school and your bf is only 25 and still just your bf. Rich or poor what sense would it make to have a kid right now ?? Who will take care of it when your in school ?? Who will pay for the kid if he decides to leave ? Saying its an accident or you did it on purpose still comes out with the same outcome. Your 22, in school and not married.
2006-11-06 06:14:20 · answer #2 · answered by JustMe 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Because the RESPONSIBLE thing to do is get married - but not because you had a baby, because you truly love someone.
You're only 22 - you have a lot of growing up to do.
2006-11-06 07:57:59 · answer #3 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
only you know your situation, but keep in mind that it might be better for the child if he/she is brought into your family when things like money, where you're living, etc are a little more stable.
2006-11-06 06:05:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself this. Why am I ready and willing to be a mother and I don't want to rush being a wife?
2006-11-06 06:06:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋