Why do people think teenage mothers aren't as.. good as adult parents?

Question

I'm 14, and i have a baby. I'm completely enjoying raising my son. And i think i can do it as well as any other person in the world. I'm just as capable to do it as anyone else. And lots of people are. most people i hear from say that kids raised from teenage mothers will be neglected and bad when they get older.

Why exactly is that, do people think that since we're young we dont care as much for babies as adults do..?

Answer 1

Honey, screw them all!!!! I was 16 when I had my daughter (her name is Alyssa too ;-) ) I am now 24 and I tell ya what, I am a better mother then most of the moms of the kids in her class. I am also a better mother then most mothers in my neighborhood! i think being a "young" mother makes you a lil more protective sometimes, because you get treated so different because you are young and you want to protect your child from that!

Answer 2

It's all based on monetary statistics, not actual emotional capabilities on raising a child.

Young mothers usually cannot support themselves (i.e. - they still live with their parents)
Young mothers are usually not at an age where they have the possibility of getting a job that can even come close to providing for themselves let alone a baby
Young mothers are far more likely to be on government assistance like welfare, etc. than older mothers

I don't feel that young mother's do not care or do not have as much love to give, but from a financial standpoint - most teenage mothers do not have the capability to raise a child - they just don't have the life experience, age, or education to make the money that is necessary to independently care for a baby. It is nothing personal, and I obviously don't hold it against anyone, government assistance is there to be used by those who need it, I just think that it is far more ideal to have a baby once you are at least legally an adult. Doesn't mean that it can't be done.

Answer 3

The problem is that most younger than 17 mothers can't mentally support and raise their own children. Alot of mothers that are 14, 15, 16, and even 17 and 18 don't want to stop playing and be mothers. Its not that you are not capable but the majority don't want to take care of their responsibility to their children. The majority of kids your age having kids do neglect their kids and grandma ends up doing the majority of the raising. If you are giving 100% to your son keep doing it and prove to every one that you are not a statistical pre-adult mother. Prove that you are just as good as an adult mom and that you are capable of raising a heathy child. This also means that you need to get educated, get your license when you can and support your child financially and emotionally. You're only 14 and you will have to find creative ways to make money, and you will have to get help from family. Don't go play all the time while your baby stays with family. Every mom needs some down time but don't take advantage of your family. You had the baby now its time to grow up. Prove your point and be a great mother!

Answer 4

Hey, I'm impressed! You've already showed the ability to be responsible for your actions, which will bode well for you as an adult. Many people buy into the stereotype that older parents always equal better, and this just isn't so. A few generations back there was something "wrong" with a woman if she wasn't married or betrothed by the time her teen years ended; now there's something wrong with her if she chooses to marry or have a baby before she's old. This is completely ridiculous, and sad. Personally, I'm just as offended when I see people my grandparents' age with ten year olds.

While 14 seems terribly young to the ear and eye, the fact that you recognize that there is this stereotype and that you enjoy your new family means you're working to prove it wrong. I'm sure you are doing the very best for your baby and good thoughts to you!

Answer 5

Hey, I think you are doing a great job by the sounds of things. Most people think someone as young as you haven't got enough life experience to assist you to do the best job. I personally think if you are a girl who comes from a big family and you have been around younger children then you might be more capable of looking after a baby compared to an older woman who has never been involved with children.

I don't think being older makes a female any more loving or interested in babies.

There are many good points about being a young mum. You have loads of energy, you want to have fun like playing games and going to the beach or to the park with your child.

There are some bad points, like you need your freedom to go out with friends. Getting an education, part-time job and juggling a baby must be difficult unless you have good support from your parents, the babies father and his family.

Any way good on you for giving motherhood the thumbs up. Too many older women are going to miss out on being mothers because they are putting of having babies (too busy being selfish) making money.

Answer 6

Your brain is growing more now than it has since you were a baby. You have so much still to discover and learn. This does not mean that you will be a bad parent. But most adults look back on their own teen years and think, "there is no way that I could have done that". We draw on our own experiences in life. I was a responsible teen, and loved kids, but I do not think that I would have handled motherhood well at a young age. I have friends the same age as me (early 30's) with teens themselves and they always say that they hope their child will not be the same as them and have children young. I hope everything works out for you, stay strong.

Answer 7

Welll
Whereas it is a difficult situation to become a mother so young...unfortuneatly---it can be a "stereo-type"
Kinda like :
"blondes?, Oh, they're all dumb"
"women? Oh, they're all bad drivers"
"men? Oh, they're all dogs"
"white guy? Oh, so you can't dance"
"black guy? Oh, so you must be really good at basketball"
"jewish? Oh, you must want to be an attorney"
"young? Oh, you can't be a good mother"
---*catch my drift....?*---
Yeah, there are SOME dumb blondes (as well as brunettes, redheads...) out there, and yeah some women who shouldn't have their license. And we all know there ARE some doggy men out there! We've all seen the white guy on the dance floor that looks like he's having a seizure...and basketball>>>Shaq, Michael Jordan, Magic-need I say more? And hey...attournies make good money, I'd do it if I could!
There's always some stereo-type established by those who gave others of their race, creed, color, gender a bad name....but it's not always true.

Point is-BREAK THE STEREO-TYPE!

It's not just how much you love him, or enjoy being with him but also by doing RIGHT by him. You're gonna have a LOT of times where you're gonna wish you could hang out w/your friends, go to parties and other social scenes..but you now have a BIG responsibility that is SO much more important than those things. I'm sure your mother will help you in any way she can so that you can continue your education, but just don't forget that YOU are HIS mother. Even at my age (and I'm old enough to be YOUR mother!) I need a sitter sometimes, but just don't put the responsiblity of RAISING him on her.
....continue loving your son. Enjoy playing with him--helping him learn and grow--keep him happy and healthy...he is such a precious gift
Prove them all wrong and put being mom first

Answer 8

i think that the reason is because they see teenage mothers very irresponsible because they got pregnant when they we're raise after they we're older and wiser and adult mothers think they know best because they we're ready to have children when a teenage girl is just bucking around and accidently got pregnant and no plans of having a child at such a young age and teenage girls like to party and still experiment but i think any young or adult mother can be a good mother as long as they take care of the baby feed him and shelter him and raise him the proper way and shows love its a good mother:0

Answer 9

Well first off, adult parents have way more experience than teenage mothers. Adults have time to raise their children because they don't have to worry about school and graduating. Once you're a mother all your free time with friends is gone and all you have is your baby, which is not a bad thing.

Answer 10

Hi! i think that people have that perception on teenage mothers because they are still in their developing years, your teenage years are suppose to be that part of life where on elearns & grows and experiences alot of different emotions and changes, they mature and develop into trustable & responsible adults. when a teenager becomes a parent she loses out on the experience of being a teenager, when she's suppose to be going out with her friends, she's sitting at home taking care of her baby, at this point this may seem irrelevent to you but later on in life you will understand my point here, that you are missing out on an imperitive part of experiencing life, as time progresses you will want to experience these times that you have lost as a young parent which will be detrimental to the type of example that you are setting for your child at that stage who will be about 10-14 years at that stage, life isn't easy and without a sound education and a qualification to fall back on in the future will you only realise that "those" people know what they are talking about. Goodluck, please note that i'm not judging you, i just wanted you to see things through my eyes, take care.

Answer 11

Well children born of teen mother are at higher risk for growing up poor and having learning disabilities as well as speech problems. Plus most teenagers are too immature to raise and have babies so they go and get abortions so they don't get stuck taking care of a kid for 18 years.