My husband recently admited that he had cheated on me. I told him to either go to couseling or get a divorce. He doesnt want to go to couseling. I told him I was willing to do anything to save our marriage. He said it was too late. I do not want a divorce, but he does. I am shocked because I had no idea the relationship would ever come to this or that he would ever cheat on me. Plus, I never thought he would not be willing to save the marriage. We are planning to get divorced. But, how can I move on ? I am deeply hurt. Please Help
2006-11-05 18:31:45 · 6 answers · asked by Elizabeth W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
u need a friend!
there r sites on the net that may help.
dont try to fight your feelings-let it all out!!
u will be ok :)
2006-11-05 18:34:13 · answer #1 · answered by J M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just watched my best friend in the whole world go through this same thing, he cheated too! He was my best friend to, they were my family so when he did this it killed me as well, when this happened the two were having there best sex life ever, they laughed all the time, getting along great, just took a trip , then bamb she got the phone call from someone at work, here he had been doing this for at least 6 months, well it's been over 1 year now and i have to say I've never seen sue happer than she is now! She lost weight, goes out once in-awhile, she just dates periodically, she's raising her 11 year old and still working, and when this all first happened she was a complete mess, really bad! I guess what I'm trying to say is "It will get easier, and better for you but of course it will take time, and by the way!..The girl he is with now...Ha Ha went out on him now Ha Ha and he is more miserable now than ever. This was the second time he had done this to sue. First time was 17 years ago. I hope this gives you a little bit of relief, I really sorry for You. I'm divorced as well. Take it one day at a time!sunnydays
2006-11-06 02:49:09 · answer #2 · answered by sunnydays 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through a very nasty divorce that was finalized about 8 months ago, trust me I know what you are feeling. I didn't deal with my divorce the way that I should have and I'm very ashamed of the things I did, but I learned through everything that life goes on and that working through the anger and the pain is the first step no matter what your way of doing this is. I completely ruined myself during my divorce. I did drugs and drank constantly because my ex told the lawyers that all I did was party and stay out all night. I slept with countless, faceless guys because he told them I would often go and stay with a different man everynight. My divorce was a very nasty one, and like I said, I didn't deal with it the way I should have. Just do whatever you have to keep your feet on the ground and don't let him try to make you feel as though you'd done something wrong. It takes time to move on, but just keep telling yourself that you are stronger than him and that you can do this. Good Luck, and I'm sorry that you have to go through this.
P.S. Join a recently divorced self help group. I thought it would make me feel like a freak, but it's really good to be able to talk t opeople who have gone, or are going through the same thing you are. Also, I met a very nice man in this group.
2006-11-06 02:44:45 · answer #3 · answered by Pheonix 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may want to join a divorce support group. You will definitely hurt for a time, but know that it will get better. I am experiencing a divorce as well and I have good days as well as bad ones. Remember you are not alone so seek counseling to ease your mind and I hope you have a good network of family and friends to help.
2006-11-06 02:36:40 · answer #4 · answered by mergirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'M NOT A PRO AT THIS I'VE BEEN MARRIED 3 TIMES,AN EACH TIME I SAID I'D NEVER MARRY AGAIN I CRAWLED UNDER A ROCK MY KIDS BROUGHT ME OUT ,I LOOKED AN LOOKED FOR THE RIGHT WOMAN NOT WANTING TO GO THREW THE BIG D AGAIN THEN I JUST GAVE UP MY BROTHER TOLD ME IF ITS MEANT TO HAPPEN IT WILL QUIT LOOKING FOR IT LET IT FIND YOU ,IF THE PERSON COULD BE YOUR BEST FRIEND WERE YOU CAN TELL YOUR DEEPEST SECRETS TO THEM AN NOT BE AFRAID OF WHAT THEY MAY THINK OF YOU ,AN YOU CAN BE YOURSELF NOT HAVE TO CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOU OR THEM THEN YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO WORK WITH,FOR ME MY FIRST LOVE CAME BACK INTO MY LIFE AFTER 20 YEARS NOT SEEING EACH OTHER WE WERE 12YEARS OLD WHEN WE LOST OUR VIRGINITY TO EACH OTHER SHE MOVED BUT WE KEPT TRACK OF EACH OTHER,AND WHEN ME MET UP 9 YEARS AGO IT WAS LIKE THE FEELINGS NEVER STOPPED WE HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR THE PAST 8 YEARS I HOPE YOU CAN FIND YOU A BEST FRIEND THAT CAN ALSO BE YOUR LOVER,GOOD LUCK
2006-11-06 03:25:49 · answer #5 · answered by trouble13d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when there is will there is way so dig it out.
2006-11-06 02:39:56 · answer #6 · answered by hm_pearl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋