I miss my ex very much. i left him after our baby was born as i was suffering from post partum depression and needed to be with my family for emotional support and he is incapable of this. unfortunately he got more and more upset with my leaving and never apologized for any of his wrong doings to cause my unhappiness. i know it might not work ,but we have a son and i would atleast like to give it one more try. but after being apart for 4 months he has a new girlfriend and does not want to retry. i am frustrated and keep telling myself to move on, but i find it so hard, why? what should i do?? its so hard to be alone with the baby for many reasons including financial. i am attractive and could meet someone else, but its hard to get out and do this.
2006-11-05 15:39:34 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Just STOP. STOP worrying about him, STOP worrying about someone else and START concerning yourself with the BABY and the BABY only.
2006-11-05 15:47:52 · answer #1 · answered by kyle g 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I know this is hard, especially with the new baby. But you truly do not want this man back. Your first sentence says it all. He's incapable of emotional support. Having a family...especially a family that works, loves and lasts, takes alot of emotional support from both parties. You can't carry this on your shoulders alone hon. You are going to be okay. Yes, it hurts now, sure, it's probably all you think about...but you are making the choice to feel that way. Each day when you get up in the morning, start focussing on something else. Poor all that hurt emotion into love for that baby and raising him to be better than his father, to know what love is. To know how to give love and receive love. That is what you need to focus on. And when the time is right, eventually you are going to meet the man of your dreams. The one who will accept you and your son, love you as you deserve to be loved and complete that perfect family you are dreaming of. I just don't believe in my heart of hearts, that your baby's father is the one for you. ...I think he was your stepping stone on your journey to get where you need to be in life.
As far as giving it one more try....that's your emotions playing tricks on you hon. You want the ideal family, you think you can make that happen if you just try harder. But the truth, is that you can't make someone love you. The fact that he's moved on so quickly and has little remorse for his actions, makes it quite clear he doesn't love you, and may never have. You also can't look for others to make you happy. That happiness has to come from within yourself. And if there is nothing else you find happy then it's time to change your way of thinking. You are a beautiful girl, a wonderful mother and someday you are going to meet someone who sees that and appreciates that. A guy that isn't afraid to show it. And when that happens, then you'll know going through a little heartache now has wisened you up for that brighter future.
Good luck honey....my heart goes out to you.
2006-11-05 16:06:34 · answer #2 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is incapable of emotional support, what makes you think he is capable now? Especially, if it took only 4 mo. to find a new replacement. You are more than likely feeling lonely at times and guilty for leaving.....he could feel like you didn't turn to him for the emotional support you needed and instead to your family. He could feel hurt, but if it is true that he wasn't there for you emotionally then it sounds like you need someone who can fulfill that for you. Just spend time with your baby and TRY not to put yourself in a position to constantly feel frustrated. Just ask or tell yourself why is this so easy for him to turn his back on his child. That should make him ask himself how he can so easily do this to his new baby. It is not just about you wanting him back, but him also wanting you back in order for this to work.
2006-11-05 15:59:31 · answer #3 · answered by Geez Louise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hon,
Don't put yourself or your baby through(trying to get back together with him) that, just because he is your son's father!!! He is not the one your suppose to be with and why would you want to be with someone who doesn't, can't and won't be there for you when you need him the most. You can raise your son alone, I raised 2 boys and a girl alone..and if I can do it so can you..smiles. As far as financially file for child support...smiles. Now time to let go of the loser and fine yourself a winner!!!smiles. Take Care and Good Luck
2006-11-05 16:22:09 · answer #4 · answered by Jenah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my. You need to concern yourself with your baby and your own mental wellness right now, so that you will be the best mother you can be. That, after all, should be your prime priority right now. Please seek out counseling and visit a physician who can evaluate your depression, because if you don't get that under control you'll never be a great mother- that's what your baby needs right now. You will have time later on to worry about relationships, but my advice beyond what I've already said is to try to forget about your ex and move on, just you and your baby.
2006-11-05 15:56:16 · answer #5 · answered by true_halcyon 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
move on.
2006-11-05 17:07:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋