if you are a pregnant teen under the age of 15 can you...?

Question

im 13 my bf is 14 im pregnant and i was wondering if i could move in with him and his family to raise our child together his mom wants me to but i havent spoke with my mom about it she doesnt even know im pregnant please dont judge me i know im young but i am willing to give my baby the best possible life i can and answers will be appreciated thanks........

i dont want to give it up and my b/f supports me 100% he loves me and his unborn child already some people just have to realize not all guys are the same. and he is excited and so am i about the baby yes i kno how much time and hard work it is going to take but i am willing to do everything in my power to give it a good life. and my mom will be very angry when i tell her because she has already told me that if i get pregnant before im 18 she will make me get an abortion but im not going to because i know that is illegal u cannot "make" someone get an abortion.

btw i have been with my b/f for a year now

i live in tennessee and my boyfriend live an hour and a half away from me so it will be kind of hard for both of us to raise the baby if we dont live together.

Answer 1

if u talk to ur mom and have ur mom and his mom talk and everything is fine, then i say why not, it's good that ur trying to take the responsiblity of taking care of baby. good luck with that sweety

Answer 2

My goodness girl dont listen to these "not so supportive answers" We have already established it was a mistake, I hope, so there is no use telling you over and over. And the boyfriend being abusive is absurd. That would be my last concern. I don not however think that your mother will let you move in with this boy. And I think that would be a wise choice. You should work with your mother on future plans so she can help raise your child. After all you cannot possibly give your child the best life without at least a high school education. And honey I am 21 the first thing I wanted in that delivery room was my mom. You would be surprised how much you need her. Plus I think once you are through playing "house" at your boyfriends you will feel uncomfortable and homesick. Just talk to your mom and stick with her you will need her so much now more than ever trust me. And good luck to you!

Answer 3

If you honestly wanted what was best for your child I think you should reconsider adoption you could even do an open adoption. You say you want your baby to have the best life can you really give that to a baby yourself being 13, you cant even get a job, besides odd jobs babysitting, lawn care etc.

Who knows if this guy will even stay around it could change. In my high school there was a girl who got pregnant in 9th grade she was 14. The father (also 14) of the baby said he was excited about it they both planned to raise the baby together and get married after they graduated. Once the baby was born they both cared for the little girl, things appears to be going fine. Well 9 months later the father disappeared, about 4 months later she found out that he had moved out of state to live with another relation. He just couldn’t take it being a father, it wasn’t that he didn’t like the baby. He just want to be a normal teenager.

Answer 4

Well, I think that your mother will be a very good ally to have while trying to raise a child, finish school and have a teenage life. Personally I would say no. Not because you are so young but rather because he is so young. You are 14. What do you want to do with your life? Do you honestly see this boy in your life 5 or 10 years from now? When you should be graduating college your child will be 10 years old. Now I whole heartedly support raising your child and providing them with the best possible life. But at your age you are going to need some help. And I cannot be sure that this kid is going to provide you with the help and support that you and your child need and deserve. Talk to your mom. They are much more understanding than you think...

Answer 5

yes it is quite possible for you to move in with your boyfriend and his family. get his mom and your boyfriend together to help you talk to your mom. you need to tell her no matter how hard it may be. Believe me you are in for quite a struggle-hopefully you can recieve some financial support from your family. Another thing i recommend is counseling--some community groups/churches may offer it---my boyfriend and i went through both parenting classes and relationship counseling and it has helped us emmensly. I also encourage you to stay in school no matter what-work hard and keep your grades up. There are plenty of scholarships for teen moms so you could possibly go to college and provide for your child. It is VERY hard to support a child on a minimum wage job-even working 40 hours a week and any higher education woulkd help you make a greater salary. If you have thought this through totally----then i say go for it at all costs. But you need to make sure you are 100% certain that you are doing the right thing. I know that it is scary but it will all work out. I am not a pregnant teen under 15--i'm 18---but i am pregnant so if you need anything feel free to contact me and i'll try to help. Good Luck!

Answer 6

Don't know what the law says, but if the law states its OK and YOUR parents agree why not? I cannot believe how tough a life you are getting ready to face being 13 and getting ready to have a baby. You really ought to consider adoption. That way the baby will be taken and loved by mature adults that have the financial resources to give your child a good life. You must realize that this relationship you have going with your b/f is not likely to last due to a multiplicity of factors. You need some SERIOUS objective counseling by people not affected by your pregnancy such as a pastor/priest or mental health professional or social worker. You are going to find this is a BIGGER load than you can even imagine and you need additional help out side of your families.

Answer 7

Sorry this is long. But you asked for questions, so I expect you to read my answer. Please.

Okay, here's a guys point of view on this. Sorry, but I don't care how in love you are. I understand completely how excited you are. I even can understand how excited he is. I even might think you two could actually love each other. But I can guarantee that when you both grow up and out of your "oh my gosh this is like totally cool" part of this whole experience, you are not going to want a baby at this point in your life. I know I sound like I'm thinking for you, and I know I don't know you at all, but I'm totally being serious. I'm not judging you and I don't think you're stupid, I promise. This is a SERIOUS adult situation, and unfortunately you've just lost your childhood no matter what you choose from here on. It's gone. And I think you already understand this to some degree, because you say you're ready to raise a baby and live like an adult (and I honestly think you could do it), but you're not ready, no matter how mature you are. And I do think it's fair to say this, even though I don't know you. I can say this just by the fact that you haven't told your mother yet. In a situation like this, that should be the FIRST thing you do, not plan everything around it. If you can't trust your mother to help you through this, there's NO WAY you can do it. I beg you to think through this like an adult. I believe you can. Don't just blow off adoption just because this baby is a part of you and you should be it's mother. Seriously consider it. Let me just say again, I KNOW its exciting now. It might even still be exciting a long while after you've had the baby, but please just think of what it'll be like when you're alone (I don't mean to be rude, but I honestly think you will be, or at least you won't be with the father - no 14 year old boy is ready to have a baby, no matter who he is. Seriously just think about it. what do you think is going through his mind throughout all of this?). Do you realize this means you'll be a mother for the rest of your life, and you can't change your mind? I know you might think placing a baby for adoption is selfish, but it's SO not. If you were really honestly and whole-heartedly thinking of what's best for your baby, you would seriously consider adoption. Adoption is good for all three of you. You get a LIFE. You can go to college, get a great job, get married to someone you really really really love and have kids with when the time is right. Your baby gets a family that you get to choose. Not many people get to pick whether they're going to be in a good family. Your baby will get the perfect family picked out even before it's born, how lucky is that! And for your boyfriend, I know he doesn't really want to be a father. He gets all the same benefits you do. He gets a life too. And you never know, maybe you two will end up together, but it's definitely not the time for the baby yet. That comes at a right time. There is a time and a season for everything.
I know I've been talking all over the place, but I hope you understand what I'm saying. I'll break it down again: Tell your mother!!! NOW! Don't make any decisions this soon. You have enough time to think it over, so do. Plan on the boyfriend not being involved, cause chances are he won't be. Please Please Please Please Please think seriously about adoption. It is good. You're not bad it you place a baby for adoption.
You are a premature adult now, so grow into it quickly. Think like an adult. Act like an adult (and tell your mother!). I hope and pray desperately that everything works out for you.

DON'T MOVE IN WITH THE BOYFRIEND!!!!!!!PLEASE!!!AND DON'T ABORT!

Please remember this is my opinion. I'm not trying to think for you or be rude or judgemental. I don't think you're a bad person. I think you can be smart with this situation. Please talk to me if you want. You can email me by clicking on my link and what not.

Answer 8

Talk to your mother, and see where she stands on all this, because since you're a minor, she has a legal say in it. I believe she might prefer you stay with her, since you are HER baby after all, but if she agrees to help you raise your child, that would be a good way to go. If she supports your decision to move in with his parents, then you will probably still have a hard time....but you will have all the help you can get to make it easier for you with both your moms involved. One question you need to ask though, is does your boyfriend want the same thing? If not, then going to live with them is not going to make your situation easier - it might make it harder, since a resentful boyfriend can give you lots of heartache. Trust me, with all the deep running emotions your hormones will produce, that's the last thing you'll need.

Answer 9

Please don't move in with him. You are way too young and your mom will be the best person to help you with the baby. She may flip out at first but she will love her grandbaby. If she doesn't get over it then you may have to move in with him. Raising a baby is hard work but you can do it. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't you just have to be strong. Babies are wonderful. Always make sure that your baby is your first pryority. You are so young. You will have to grow up really fast but there is nothing more rewarding than a baby. Good luck. my prayers are with you.

Answer 10

Depending on the state that you live in and the rules--sometimes pregnancy makes a child an adult by emancipation. Call your local court house and they should be able to tell you what your rights are as a young mother.

I would talk to your mother if I were you. There are ways to work it out where the two of you can live apart and still have everything work out. There are other ways to do this and you don't want to ruin your chances with your mother. This could ruin your relationship and if things don't work out with your boyfriend, who will back you up? Your mom probably would but don't you want there to be no resentment?

Answer 11

If you want to give your baby the best possible life than start acting like an adult. Tell your mom the truth and unless she is having problems then listen to her advice. But perhaps the best thing to do would be to give this baby up for adoption to some willing people that are more ready than you can possibly be at 13!