I'm not a shallow person. I know I'm not. But I get the sense that some of my friends think I am. They act as if I come off shallow or aloof. Some have even told me. Maybe "shallow" isn't the right word. I don't know. Maybe "stupid" or "crazy" or "rambling" would be better. I'm 100% positive I'm not shallow. I actually DO think a lot, I just usually keep my deep thoughts to myself and speak my normal thoughts. How do you avoid coming off as shallow or stupid?
2006-11-05 11:41:30 · 5 answers · asked by anonymous 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I have struggled with the same problem for a long time. But I am finally getting to grips with it. What I have found is, it is great to have someone to practice with. Someone who love's you enough to not take it personally when you say the wrong thing, and who can tell you how the things you say come across to them. When you are talking to someone don't be thinking about what you are going to say to them. Listen to them intently and reflect back to them what you think they have said to you. Then say what you think about what they have said no mater how stupid it may seem (it probably isn't that stupid).
The practice, practice practice. you will get better and people will know that you care about what they think and have to say.
My prayers go out to you.
I am still growing in this area myself but I have seen improvement and so have others.
And finally take the test to see how good a person you really are, this helped me as well.
http://www.wayofthemaster.com/goodperson.shtml
2006-11-05 11:56:22 · answer #1 · answered by Heath 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I disagree with the foundation of your announcement that making appears a precedence equals vanity. Here is why: Everyone has demands. Emotional, religious, bodily, sexual, and so forth. For me, the object in a dating that makes me such a lot HAPPY is affection (nonsexual touching and verbal kindness) and having amusing in combination. BUT... the object so they can make me such a lot UNHAPPY is loss of bodily stuff (sexual) or if she "shall we herself cross" and doesnt care approximately her look. (If a lady earnings weight, no longer a deal breaker... if she earnings weight and doesnt care that it impacts me, then its an limitation) Men are taught that basing whether or not or no longer you favor a lady on appears is shallow... however I consider we have to be functional. It is a side of relationships and for a few it's extra principal than others... there is not any proper or improper, we're who we're.
2016-09-01 07:48:48 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're concealing your "deep" thoughts (whatever that means), then you're holding back a part of yourself and it's possible that your friends can sense that. If they suspect -- even subconsciously -- that you're not who you pretend to be, then that will get in the way of a genuine friendship.
You're going to have to trust somebody sometime. You could start with yourself.
Good luck.
2006-11-05 11:51:31 · answer #3 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look like you spend more time developing your mind than picking out your wardrobe.
2006-11-05 11:44:52 · answer #4 · answered by Chris 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
problems like these start from the inside. confirm yourself from the inside out. those who are your friends will figure it out.
2006-11-05 11:45:21 · answer #5 · answered by firechap20 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋