Am i right in getting angry with my husband for going out with his friends every week?

Question

he almost never takes me along with him...its just been 8 months since our marriage and we hardly get ne time alone. we stay wit his family and he has soo many frends...i m sitting here at 10:30 at nite on a sunday waiting for him to go home, havent had dinner coz we always eat together...wot shud i do?

Answer 1

First of you should have a date at lease as many times as he goes out with the guys. I would also say as many hours on your date as he goes with his friends too. He should spend as much money on you as his friends. I set no limits on the time he spends with his friends knock your self out I tell him but I am expecting minute for minute and cent for cent for me. Second dinner is non negotiable that is at home 6 days a week and only once every 5 weeks you can give him a second dinner with the boys but remember he has to take you out for dinner every time he takes the boys out.

If he does not agree to this wow something wrong at home. I hope this works because if it does not it gets considerably more challenging. Try this first.

Answer 2

A few things:
1- You should tell him how you feel, but be sure to respect the fact he has friends and hobbies and deserves time with them too.
2- I would ask if his friends have girlfriends/wives you can all go out together- or YOU plan something fun and tell him to invite his buddies and their significant others to come.
3- THE HARD PART! I can relate, as I have moved around and end up living where my hubby or previous boyfriends are from... You become dependent on their social circle-- not fun! You need to do some soul searching for hobbies/interests for you and make your own plans.. That will probably make your man a little more appreciative of the time he spends with you--instead of having that security-- you are waiting at home for him all the time.. You both need your own interests outside of your relationship-- and it is great when you can bring/join the two together on occassion... P.S. How old are you and where are from? I would look for some groups/clubs/ class etc...

Answer 3

Well...

Maybe you two should sit down and negotiate a time that he can hang with the boys, like lets say every Friday night he can hang with his pals, and maybe you can make Friday your night to hang with the girls or use it as a night for you to watch a movie that he wouldn't enjoy or do a hobby.

Let Saturday be a day where you spend the evening together but let the day time be negotiable depending on what's going on with both of your groups of friends.

Sunday evening is not a day to be out. I think Sunday evening is usually unwind time before the work week and most people I know spend it together at home, relaxing together.

Answer 4

Well sounds as though you married someone that was not ready to get married. You have every right to be upset. It is one thing if it was once a month and you knew exactly what he was doing. If he wants to be with his buddies why cant he invite them over and have a few drinks there instead of going out tell him he can throw a party there or have a guys night at home playing poker. If he is out with his buddies things can happen.

Answer 5

Tell him to grow up, he's a married man now. His responsibilities have changed. If he wanted to party with his friends all the time he should have stayed single. If he's unwilling to change his habits, make plans to go out with your friends whenever he goes with his. He'll either stop or at least you can have some fun also. I wouldn't wait for him to eat my dinner, as a matter of fact I wouldn't cook his. Hopefully you can talk to him and make him understand that this upsets you, If he's going to go out he should be taking you with him.

Answer 6

Your new husband hasn't learned any responsibility yet!! This answer is coming from a 60 year old man, and I hope I don't bore you.
I too married, and lived with my mother early on in my marriage. I didn't want to settle down, but one day woke up, and realized what all of this was doing to my marriage. Yes, my wife gave me an alternative, her, or my mother, and my life style.
I chose her, and never regretted it!!

Answer 7

You shouldn't have to put up with your husband putting you on the backburner. There is nothing wrong with having friends...but there is a line you shouldn't cross and it seems like your husband is crossing it. Not only should you eat without your husband, you need to think about where your relationship is going if he continues to put your relationship last. You need to sit down and have a conversation with your husband about this...if he doesn't respect what you have to say, your marriage may be over.

Answer 8

only 8 months into the marriage??????

first you need to get your own place asap!!!, it sounds like he still thinks he is single and staying home with his parents only makes it worsts,,you sound like you're a young couple, how long did you guys know eachother before u got married? this is something that a lot of couples go through, feeling like they're still single, sit down with him and talk, get your and his priorities straight, one thing to think about is : "lost of friends" will never get you a house, a job, a car or a marriage,,,

good luck

Answer 9

You have the right to get angry with your husband. A married man should not go out with friends every week. You have to talk with him and explain how you feel about the situation.

Answer 10

I dont think u shood get angry Just tell him ur feeling left out. Ask for a few times a week alone with him. I'm sure he'll understand and b ok w/ tht. But u cant sit around & wait for him to read ur mind. Dont get mad, fiz it.