My friend has stopped eating because she thinks she is fat, but she really isn't! She hasnt eaten anything over the past week, and its really begging to worry me!
She said that she feels faint and tired all the time, and i was just speaking to her and i was telling her what she was doing to her body was wrong and she shouted at me and told me that she hates me and that she hates the fact that I always bug her all the time over the fact that she isnt eating.
She also that i dont need to worry because she will eat again, after she has gone to meet her "love of her life" i.e- see some man preform in a gig
I really worried and i dont want her to get seriously hurt.
What can i say to make her feel better about the way she is. I've tried most things already, but they haven'y worked.
Also she cuts herself and has terrible scars on her arm.....
PLEASE HELP!!!!
2006-11-04 23:39:06 · 12 answers · asked by Wonder Why? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Your friend really needs help, she has extreme low self-esteem and this is making her cut herself and stop eating. She is probably depressed and she is anorexic. Not eating until you meet the love of your life is a non-realistic goal. Not because she will not find this person, but because she states goals outside her grasp of influence. This is very unhealthy.
Helping her is the hardest thing. You've tried and I admire you for that, but she doesn't want to be helped, and this is because she feels attacked everytime you tell her she's doing things wrong. You must expect more hatred from her when you'll continue to help her, but remember that that hatred may be aimed at you, but isn't made by you, it's made from her self hatred, and she doesn't know this, and aims it at anything that's visible for her: you, but also her body.
Your friend really needs professional help. Maybe you can talk to a councellor where you live, or talk to her parents, or someone else who knows her. Tell her that you're worried about her, but don't tell her she does things wrong, because she'll feel worse and will hate herself more. Tell her that you think she could use someone to talk to her, and that you think that she could benefit from professional health. Tell her it's not normal to hunger herself and scar herself, that only people who dislike themselves do that.
I admire you for wanting to help her. Lots of people would have backed away. I wish you lots of strength.
2006-11-04 23:52:12 · answer #1 · answered by Jaco K 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
She just has poor self-image, which may or may not be related to her being fat. If you say she isn't really fat, then it's because of something else that she's insecure about.
Truthfully, something like this you should see a professional about. However, I have a feeling that both you and her are very disinclined to do so. But please, try to seek someone who can talk to her. If you know her parents, and know they are good people, I'd say turn to them.
Quick note: Just so you know, some people do commit suicide by not eating. If she has a plan to commit suicide, then it's bad. You know it's really bad, if she starts setting dates, or general timelines. By then, you really need to contact a health professional. You should start by looking up local organizations. Suicide hotlines are available, as well as depression hotlines and so forth.
2006-11-04 23:45:31 · answer #2 · answered by tracethelostboy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's very nice of you to be concerned for her, but, according to things I've seen about both the cutting and not eating; she needs professional help. QUICK! Tell someone! Tell a councilor at school, tell a minister, tell your parents and hers, tell someone who can point to the right direction to start getting some help for her. It's too big for you to handle.
God bless you and I hope you will get led to the place where someone will intervene and make a difference.
2006-11-05 00:05:31 · answer #3 · answered by JoJoCieCie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend has a very low self esteem. She needs to hear that you love her everyday. How is her family life? Is it normal? Does she have a mother and father who care about her? I lknow someone who has no mother and father to talk to because all they do is scream at her and she does the same things and no one can help her. I was told to show her love and she will come out of it, but it's going to take time.
2006-11-04 23:51:44 · answer #4 · answered by shirlandjerry@yahoo.com 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have got to earn again the believe. First, that DID make you appear dangerous. It used to be particularly imply. You ordinarily will have to express regret, and perhaps inform your instructor that you just did. And express regret to her too. Then juts do as you as a rule do, be "well" in that elegance.
2016-09-01 07:29:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
write her a letter to tell her how much you love, care about and worry about her
try to be kind and mild
sometimes, it's better to write than talk
she might be calmer
2006-11-05 01:25:36 · answer #6 · answered by pandora 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u must talk to her as well as you have to talk to her parents and tell her that the love of her life should love her the way she is not love her bcoz her beauty and body
2006-11-04 23:55:20 · answer #7 · answered by maro 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get her some help and fast! a teacher or a parent, seriously if you dont youll seriously regret it!
2006-11-04 23:42:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bring her to a psychiatrist or psychologist.
2006-11-04 23:42:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you really need to tell someone. don't tell her mom or anyone like that, tell a counsler or something.
2006-11-05 01:00:50 · answer #10 · answered by Look into the Air 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋