Whenever I asked, "How about this wkeend? How about we do this or that? Go here or there?" My bf's typical answer is, "I don't know." OR "I don't know b/c I don't know what's going to happen."
My answer: "Nobody knows what's going to happen. If you want it then you plan for it."
My questions are: 1. Am I right to say that? 2. What does it mean when he never plan time to spend with me.
Background: We've been together for almost 3 yrs. We live half an hour apart. We see each other, at most, twice a week.
2006-11-04 17:52:32 · 8 answers · asked by webmail0806 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
my bf does that. Plan what you want he will follow. They always do, they just don't want to actually think of something to do. Don't tell them what you plan until the day of doing it.
Be sure to be flexable in case they really don't want to do it or actually come up with something better/something you didn't.
He likes to gripe about "chick things" but I find he'll never admit to actually liking it, which he almost always does. Be sure to mix up the she/he activities and enjoy the "stay at home" weekends!!
good luck!
2006-11-04 17:56:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I have been in the same boat.. I feel for you I really do. What my bf and I did was sit down and discuss our problems that we had on hand. Him and I lived 2 hours apart from each other it was hard. now I live around him. I am not saying go live next door to your man but if he truly loves you then he would want to make the effort to spend time with you. You two should at least have date once a week. If he can not give that you then discuss and if he still doesn't want to change then find some one who will want to take the time and be with you like you deserve.
2006-11-05 02:00:57 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your boyfriend reminds me very much of my ex-boyfriend who rarely takes the initiative to plan an outing for both of us- to the extent that it seems like he doesnt care if we even spend time together or not. i guess this answers your second question.
you are right to say that. planning ahead creates that excitement of spending time together. when you plan, you look forward to it taking place, having fun together- even if it is something simple like planning which movie to catch and so on.
3 years has been a long time. and sometimes at this point, a relationship may have fallen into a state of mundane routine. meeting every weekend and so on, doing nothing but the same things. spice up your time together. on your part now, plan exciting outings together. let you take charge for now.
if you want to see if it matters to your boyfriend... after doing this for a while.... dont take the role of the planner or even ask your boyfriend if you want to spend time together that weekend. see if he comes around asking or not.
2006-11-05 02:03:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anna D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people just don't like making plans! I hate planning out my weekend ... usually if I say I am going to do something at noon on Saturday when Saturday morning comes I usually have more reasons why not to do it since I planned it. You see I am probably in bed and I am thinking it is cold and I don't want to get up....
However if you call at say 11:AM on Saturday and say "hey do you want to go to (wherever) at noon" I will probably say yes since I am woken up by your phone call ...
I know it sounds wierd, but I am the same way! I just hate scheduling crap... I already have a work schedule I don't need to have a fun schedule. I like my fun to be spontaneous, when I think of schedules I think of crap I don't want to do ....like work!
He probably feels the same!
2006-11-05 02:15:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most men really don't care what you want to do or where you want to go, they'll just go with you.
Since you're the problem solver then you can always decide what you both should do on the weekends.
2006-11-05 02:20:49 · answer #5 · answered by choosinghappiness 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We plan all of our time together. We don't spend any time apart unless there is no other option.
2006-11-05 01:54:47 · answer #6 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes you are right to say that and he probably is nervous that whatever you're planning he won't have any fun or something.
2006-11-05 01:54:23 · answer #7 · answered by brown eyed gurl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely I would if I had a gf
2006-11-05 01:54:16 · answer #8 · answered by badboy22bs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋