Is marriage pointless in modern society?

Question

It seems that nobody knows how to stay commited to a realtionship anymore.
Divorce is higher than ever. "Married people are now in the minority in the US." (Associated Press)

Several people on here ask "Is it wrong to be in love with someone else when i'm married?"....

What's the point anymore? Why get married? It's simpler to just break up than divorce.

Someone, PLEASE enlighten me here...

Answer 1

Marriage is not pointless, but it has changed a lot over the years. Sure, the divorce rate is much higher, but I'm not convinced that's an entirely bad thing.

In the "old" days, people stayed in horrible, abusive, loveless marriages because they didn't want to deal with the embarrasment of divorce. Were they really so superior? I have my doubts....

Answer 2

Seiously. Marriage is what you make of it. Its what you put into it. Nothing is easy, if you have to work at marriage, and if you dont that it will fail. Anything that comes too easy has some kind of catch. Yes divorce rate is high, spouses cheat. Maybe the question should be how we are raising our children. The point....umm.. maybe people should think a little harder with their brains then their genitals. Marriage is a beautiful, commited thing. Wish everyone could have it. Those feeling of getting old and knowing the person beside you knows everything, loves you no matter what, seen you thru thick and thin. I think thats enough to make me happy.

Answer 3

There is a point where the couples do feel like they're going to be together forever and want so show that to one another so they get married...

Another thing is that they move in together, have a kid or buy a house or something like so that they feel like it's the next step so they feel they're obligated to get married...

There are tax benefits and if one spouse were to die their assets would go to their significant other or if one spouse were to be put on life support of some reason the other spouse would have some say in what to do...

Yes, the divorce rate in our country is absolutely horrible, but how days it's more acceptable so less people aren't afraid of what others are going to think of them if they divorce. It's more socially acceptable...

The divorce rate is slowly declining from past years...

Answer 4

Well pretty much it seems that way.. But marriage ought to be important and sacred. For all the reasons for divorce is usually because there is no religious foundation. If the same person does not believe in the same core values you have of course it will not work. Sex and all that will slowly go away. Moder pressure and the daily grind will consume your thoughts and you will pay less attention to your mate. that usually results in looking at other and then pondering bad thoughts.

Marriage was ment to be wonderful,, but if you dont follow the instruction manul it wont work. Just like anything eles.

Answer 5

I hope it's not pointless, I think that should still be the main goal in a serious relationship. If a couple doesn't marry, it's just an easy way out. With marriage, it's a lot harder, therefore I would think they would try harder to fix the problems. There are problems in every relationship. People just don't know how to deal with them. I am not saying I do know how either. I am living with my boyfriend, we have been together for 1.5 years and we moved in after only being together for a summer. We have had ups and downs, but no real threats to move out. I only think it, but wouldn't dare doing it. Talking and comprimise must happen.

Answer 6

I think the problem is people rush into marriage. Everybody thinks they've got to get married to ease their guilty feelings they have due to lust and pre-marital sex...

I think if you have found the right person and really work at it marriage can be a beautiful thing. People are lazy when it comes to relationships these days. Nobody wants to work on it. If you find the right one you will find someone whose views are the same as yours...you know, you both have the same goals and you don't become "quitters"...I'm happily married but I can tell you we have our disagreements and arguments and feel like we could just walk out but the key is to just hang in there if you want a lasting relationship and someone to grow old with. You must be "in love" and not in lust with someone. There's sex with anybody out there but there are only special relationships where love plays the key role. Sometimes it's,(love) hard to find but patience pays off in the long run. Eventually that special someone comes along and you know you are both traveling the same road with the same goal in sight. Marriage makes that relationship stronger and more beautiful than you could ever imagine.

When you get married, don't think about when are we going to break up or divorce...think about when we're going to be sitting in our rocking chairs talking about the "good ole days". Don't go into a marrage thinking it will end....think forever and make it happen. "If it is to be, it's up to me"! That's the attitude you both need.

Answer 7

Society in general wants things yesterday... when did everyone become so impatient.

Divorce is too easy and seems to be a quick fix for most who should have never married to begin with.... our heads are pumped daily with what we should want, look like, eat, drink... too many become consumed with a wedding, house, etc. and true love is forgotten.

My husband and I struggled long and hard to be together for many years and it's working through the tuff times that keeps us strong. We've been together 11 years but only married for 3. It's not all roses but I love him and he loves me and we work at it everyday!

Don't give up... you are man enough to see that there are concerns with marriage, hopefully you will find a mate that shares your beliefs and will be committed to you and your relationship for the right reasons.

Answer 8

It's pointless for those who don't believe in themselves individually and as a couple.

It starts with the individual learning to value and love themself as a person...many people haven't learned to love themselves. Not getting past that first step is what makes marriage difficult for many.

Unconditional love must be mutual.
You must love yourself unconditionally. Value and respect yourself unconditionally.
Your partner must feel the same about him/herself.
Together the two of you must share that same love for one another and you must continue to renew your commitment to one another daily...

Our society is so self-centered.
Many of us do not truly love ourself.
We expect quick fixes and easy answers and run when things get hard, boring, or difficult.

Marriage isn't about 'self.' It's much larger than that.
Marriage can't stand if the foundation is cracked.
Marriage isn't about quick fixes but long term solutions and hard work...

It's just an individual thing that transpires into a couple thing.
Marriage truly starts at home.

Answer 9

I've never met anyone I couldn't live without. People are not what we were told they were 30 years ago. Someone said to me today that kids don't act like they used to. They will be surprised when no one wants to be around thier snotty attitude self and they spend more time alone than they ever thought they would!
Men don't love women as much as they love themselves and can't commit to anyone anymore! I'm better off by my self and hiring people to cut my grass or paint my house or move a 2 ton couch for me!!!

Answer 10

Marriage is not pointless in any society. The institution of marriage is not the issue, lack of morals, ethics and commitment are. If you are of good character and are blessed with a partner who is the same, marriage can be what it is supposed to be. When it is right, it is wonderful.