My best friend told me last week that she was in love with a distant cousin brother of hers, I told her to get over it but she didn't. Then she had sex and now she is having his baby and she is only 14 and a half, I am worried about her.
2006-11-04 17:07:32 · 23 answers · asked by ilovesnow 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
A distant cousin brother as in, her grand mother's, cousin sister's daughter's son.
2006-11-04 17:15:27 · update #1
Dear I love snow,
Look I don't know how old the other people who answered this question but I am over thirty and I do have a few things I want you to know.
1) Be careful that you really want to be in the middle of this. You need to do something but if you tell her parents she's going to be angry at you, and they may ask you questions you don't feel right in answering. Your friend's anger might subside but it might not and you may loose her as a friend.
2) A fourteen year girl can give birth but she needs to be monitored all during the pregnancy.
3) She needs to see an OBGYN!!! Either she can go to a clinic and keep the pregnancy secret for a short while (these things do show and quickly with young mothers!) Or she can talk to her parent (mother) or guardian or aunt about it. Usually females are better about this. I don't expect her family is going to be at all pleased but before the first semester is over she really needs to tell them and get looked at!
You can tell your friend that you want to help her, but as scared and nervous and possibly mixed up emotionally as she is. She has to make a few adult decisions.
first- she needs to talk to her parents. She has to decide this. Or you can tell her that you really want to keep quiet about it but you're worried for her and the baby .Tell her that you're here to support her, but her parents need to know about this so that they can help her and the baby. She's probably going to cry and possibly yell at you. She's pregnant and pregnant women have tons of hormones running though their system and it's difficult for them to control themselves and add onto those hormones she's a teenager and her hormones are going wild anyway so this is twice as difficult for you in being able to help her and keep the friendship! If after a few weeks she won't tell her parents than you have to decide if keeping a secret and a friend is more important than helping her out. The thing is that when and if you have to tell the parents they may react badly about it to you. This is called killing the messenger. It happens a lot when friends and family try to help each other out.
Now as for the relationship between this girl and the baby's father? I'm just as confused as anyone else but if they are blood related than there definitely will be defects
Look you're already in a tough position. I've been there but not the same case. what happened to me was one friend got the other pregnant and than said it wasn't hers and than wackiness happened and I had to get new friends.
All I can say to make you feel better about all of this is no matter what happens you know you did the best for your friend and her baby. And that life is a roller coaster! It sounds stupid but one day you're in that coaster car and you're at the apex and you're loving the view and the air feels nice on your face and everything is going good! Than the next day you can be in your coaster car and you're going down, down down soo fast you can't think. Just remember that whatever happens you'll be back up at the apex watching the view and feeling great!
Good luck Iluvsnow! And if you need to talk (type) More about it my Email is Mistyfan69@yahoo.com. Good luck and I hope it all works out!
Some key words if you want to look up about the birth defects to tel your friend:
consanguinity
Cousin marriages
In breading and defects.
2006-11-07 12:12:40 · answer #1 · answered by mistyfan69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, is it a cousin or a brother? Something in the question doesn't make sense. The baby will be normal by miracle only if it is a brother. If it is first cousin, slim chance of being normal and both have high chance of having mental and physical deformaties. i know a family , first cousins. something is wrong with all 4 kids, blindness, deformatied, dwarfism, mental disorders and that's just to name a few. Not good!!! Her mamma needs to be told and an abortion should take place ASAP. Who is going to tale care of a child born of a child that has so many problems? She needs to be locked up for about 3yrs. Then monitored.
2006-11-04 17:15:18 · answer #2 · answered by MISS-MARY 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, there is no such thing as a distant cousin brother?
Second, she is to young to be having a baby!
Third, when people of the same family linage have children together it increases the chance's of abnormal traits being passed on to the child, and it don't matter if its brother,sister,cousin, mother, son, father, daughter ect. ect ect.
It seems that this is a very distant brother-cousin?
If I have this stait, it would be her great-aunts cousin's son?
They may not even be related by blood? Unless this cousin is cousin to her Grandmother as well as her Grandmother's sister?
Dose her grandmother and great-aunt have the same parents?
If so then it would be her Grandmother's cousin too.......making them blood related, making her Mother and one of the parents to this boy, second cousins, making her and this boy third cousins.
If the family has traits for certain abnormalities it could be passed on to the child, they most likely have the same chances of having a child with abnormal traits as anyone.
If the family has no abnormal traits.........it won't matter if its her brother,first, second or thrid cousin.
Her age is the biggest factor!
2006-11-04 17:51:16 · answer #3 · answered by pirate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-21 07:09:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's a distant cousin brother?
2006-11-04 17:11:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, If she really is having a baby-whether or not it is her cousin or brothers-she should be aware of all the responsiblities having a baby will take.
2006-11-04 17:09:48 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Day 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to be worry about her. Do her parents know? If not, they need to know, sooner than later. Is see getting prenatal care? She needs to be visiting a doctor regularly. As friend, all you can really do is be there for her and try to help her. Can you talk to your mom about this? I'm sure that she would be a wealth of information for you. Best wishes.
2006-11-04 17:14:51 · answer #7 · answered by raintigar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess that would be her grandmothers cousins grandson. Luckily for her that the chain is of DNA is pretty far and between. But unluckily for her she has pretty much ruined her life
2006-11-04 17:40:10 · answer #8 · answered by Oops! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her about the resposonbilitys of having a baby
2006-11-04 18:18:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what exactly is a distant cousin brother??
2006-11-04 17:10:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋