So i am dating a guy, 25 years old currently holding a work permit, for the second time today. Still, we don't have so much in common and we stayed quiet for some of the time. So i thought may be we are not very suitable for each other and he is, too, not that into me. But in the second date, he played with my hands, placed his hands on mine, put my hand on his lap and held my hands (ocassionally). I don't know what that means? He also talks about how he wants to get into serious dating and get married. I was a bit scared cus i thought it is a bit early to talk about this. So, i built a wall between us and don't have a lot of trust in him. At the same time, i still have feelings for him. He did point out one thing: he feels that i don't like to share my feelings with him and i don't like to express myself.
I feel very frustrated and afraid to get cheated on (for using me to get citizenship).
2006-11-04 15:55:19 · 17 answers · asked by polinatora 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Put citizenship aside & ask yourself if this is a man you could spend the rest of your life with.
Probably not so early in the relationship.
If he keeps talking about marriage before you've had a chance to really get to know each other then you'll know he's only after citizenship.
Be careful because you don't want to marry a man who is only using you.
2006-11-04 15:59:31 · answer #1 · answered by Michelle *The Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are right to be suspicious and uncomfortable with this guy. talking marriage after only 2 days is very strange. Either he wants to use you for citizenship, or he's a loser who has never been in love, and thinks after two dates he's ready to get married, cause he's never even had two dates with the same girl before, so to him that's a serious relationship. Maybe in time he'll turn out to be a great match for you, but I would simply tell him that talk of marriage is making you uncomfortable and that you would not consider marriage to someone unless you'd been dating for atleast a year.
2006-11-04 16:02:24 · answer #2 · answered by FrederickS 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make it clear to him that you don't intend to marry anyone unless you have been with him for a certain period of time (months, years, whatever). If you've only been out with him twice, I'd say that it's too early to even know if you have feelings for him, much less the other way around. Tell him you want to wait at least 2 years before you marry someone and see what he does...if he leaves, he was probably just after citizenship. If he sticks around he might actually be into you.
2006-11-04 16:01:48 · answer #3 · answered by rdnck_grl_ms_007 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to tell him how you feel. You don't necessarily need to tell him that your think he's using you, but tell him that you just aren't ready to be talking about marriage. You want to ENJOY life, not throw it away for marriage.
If gets upset with that, then you know the truth.
I dated a guy once who was using me to get citizenship. He was great until I told him that I didn't want to get married for 5 years. Yeah, that set him off. He started asking why, why, why? I told him that I was too young to start even thinking about marriage, kids, life, etc. I was 18! He said that my clock is ticking and I better use it now. AND BECAUSE I WAS SO FAT AND UGLY, THAT I SHOULD MARRY HIM. Let's just say that I ended that without a second though.
2006-11-04 15:57:47 · answer #4 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The shape forbids 'ex post facto' rules, so every person who's a citizen on the instant must be same. i do no longer think of we ought to consistently toss the belief of babies born interior the U. S. being voters. i'm fantastically cynical, yet even i think it would be trampling the ideals of the founding fathers. nonetheless, illegals intentionally having 'anchor babies' is a troubling phenomenon, and doing something approximately it would make experience. perchance newly-born citizen-babies of unlawful extraterrestrial beings must be sepparated from thier regulation-breaking mom and dad for thier very own sturdy - until the mummy and dad conform to return to thier native land, and/or repudiate the youngster's US citizenship, in prefer of thier very own. Or something alongside those lines, yet ideally extra humane.
2016-11-27 19:40:56 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Run don't walk - there are red flags showing up. Maybe you should read the statistics and what happens to marriages where a citizenship is involved. I think you first instinct was right - nothing in common.
2006-11-04 16:01:28 · answer #6 · answered by junebug 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well maybe he really likes you. Just give the guy a chance and try to get to know him better. If after a hile, you still feel like you cant trust him, then let him go :-)
2006-11-04 16:00:21 · answer #7 · answered by wittlewabbit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be honest and upfront.. Tell him you are holding back, cause you dont want a relationship just to be a green card ticket (or whatever).. see what his reaction is, once you let him know you are aware.. If his intentions are honerable, he wont press that issue or seek it out..
2006-11-04 15:59:07 · answer #8 · answered by Mintee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he sounds somewhat desperate, and wanting too much too soon, just be careful,you hardly know him, and it is too soon to even think of marriage.he has told u what he wants, serious dating and marriage, so i would say he has ulterior motives, and he has designes on your citizenship.
2006-11-04 16:20:15 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ummm I doubt he is interested in anything from you other than citizenship.
2006-11-04 16:58:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋