Every time I ask my boyfriend a question he grumbles and sighs (I don't ask a ton of pointless questions). If I ask him a question about money, his friends, or try to tell him how I feel about his best friend not liking me. He gets angry, and he defends his friend!? How can I get him to accept that he isn't eight about everything and give me more respect?
2006-11-04 13:11:04 · 28 answers · asked by simplegrl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
After seeing some of the answers I would like to clarify by saying I am completely supportive of him spending time with his friends (for example he was out last night until 1 am) When I ask about money it is in regards to grocery money he is supposed to give me that he is procrastinating about (I am a stay at home mom with our 11 month old daughter) or bills I need him to pay that are overdue.
2006-11-04 13:46:43 · update #1
if u see these things in him now, it is a preview of what your marriage will be. so before u marry him, take a good look at his behavior now. what u allow him to do now he will continue later, marriage won't make a difference to him. usually when men are dating you they are on their best behavior. he will never show respect to you, he wants to do exacly what he wants to do, without regard for your feelings. the two of you are not alike and there are alot of issues and maybe it would just be easier to move on to someone who shows u the respect you seek.
2006-11-04 13:22:18 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because he is not a man, he's a boy. And he sounds like he isn't mature enough yet to be in a real, serious relationship. If you are wanting to be, I would just honestly look at him, your relationship together, if there is something there you think is special, that he is the one, just a bit rough around the edges still, then have a serious talk about it with him, telling him this. If he still gives you the same responses, he is not ready, part ways, move on. Maybe someday he will be, who knows. If not, there are men out there, and hopefully you'll find one.
2006-11-04 13:24:34 · answer #2 · answered by jph_photographer 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is that he doesn't respect you at all it seems, ever heard that song When a Man Loves a Woman....Well its very true he says in the song "Turn His Back on His Best Friend if He put her Down" those words mean alot and I would say that he has other things he finds more important than you...So you need to let him know to start giving you respect or hit the door you don't need that crap!
2006-11-04 13:14:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I will just like to tell you tat, usually guys don like to be interrupted especially when they are concentrating on certain things, like watching a match, checking emails, etc.
Another thing is never speaks bad of his best friend too much.... you see.... Most guys need to have friends. They cannot survive without any unlike gals.... perhaps, he knows his best friend longer than you. Of course he will defend for his friends, he cant lose them.
Another thing.... when you talk about money, are you complaining that he spends too much, or he doesn't earn as much? Once in awhile, its ok to mention about the issue, but if we are talking about daily, he will thinks that you nag too much....
Now I think that he grumbles and sigh because you keep talking about things he doesn't like.... money, his friends, his best friends etc.... why don you try changing the topic? starts with we he likes....
There is one thing to note.... please be tactful when you make comments.... it is always good to be polite else it will end up a fight again... and we both know problems don solve that why....
I hope this little advice helps. Good luck !!
2006-11-04 13:29:26 · answer #4 · answered by Com Nerd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are better guys out there. My fiancee and I never argue about things like that. I have friends who have men who are the same way...or actually they HAD men who were like yours. My fiancee will stop what ever he is doing (even stop watching football) to listen to me. If he is really busy he will tell me to hold on and then listen. He never complains if I have something on my mind. Your boyfriend sound very insensitive. As far as the contributing part, he sounds like he's trying to procrastinate to get out of it. How often does he go out? Is that his child also? My fiancee and I have children also, we don't usually go out and if we do, it's together. Do the two of you ever get to go out? It's really nice of you to support his going out, does he take you out? Or is it always "boys night out"? Be careful, he may be cheating. I can't tell you to leave him because if you love the man and haven't had enough, you're not going anywhere. Not that that's a bad thing, just a learning experience. My daughter's father was like this and he was abusive. He would leave at night, stay out half the night and I found out he was cheating. I put up with A LOT (even the cheating at first) until I realized I had enough and I was too good to put up with his bs. You need to sit down with your boyfriend and just tell him that he needs to help out fianciallyl and he needs to be more sensitive to your feelings.
2006-11-04 21:59:09 · answer #5 · answered by ladystarrchild107 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mine was doing the same thing as yours. I just asked a question about one gripping all the time, mine was a cheater and I knew it, he just didn't know that I knew he was. So I am going to watch this and see if I can get more info about this problem. I think these good old boys have serious problem..lack of brains and wasn't raised right at home, (you know.... how to treat a woman right).
2006-11-04 13:20:14 · answer #6 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Us guys are jerks most of the time. He might see your questions as being nagging. Try to approach the question in a lighthearted way. Make sure he's not watching the game at the same time you're asking him questions. We can't pay attention to two things at once. That's just how us guys operate.
2006-11-04 13:13:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The questions you ask, are they "loaded" questions? Do you have a point to prove by asking these questions? Are you asking these questions, not to obtain an answer, but to be able to talk about whats on YOUR mind? Carefully consider these points and you may have the answer to your question here. If your questions to your boyfriend are just that, simple questions then maybe he is hiding something, something about his friends or maybe he wishes to keep his friends out of his relationship with you. Think about it.
2006-11-04 13:16:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men don't get angry,your man does.Maybe it's because he doesn't know how to solve the problem(s) between you and his friend and not giving it a rest,(meaning you won't let it go) get him even more frustrated.But it sounds like to me that your trying to control him and his lifestyle.How much respect do you think you need from him? If you don't like what your going through,leave.
2006-11-04 13:22:51 · answer #9 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not have to put up with that. Get some self respect and dump him. My husband would never treat me in such a manner. You're just headed for trouble if you stay with this one.
2006-11-04 13:16:56 · answer #10 · answered by shojo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋