I'm having an affair. Please help!?

Question

I'm 15, female and I'm having an affair with boy aged 17 who's engaged to a girl 1 and 1/2 years younger than me.

This boy is my ex. and we went out for 6 months. Now he's been have feelings for me, and we've started having an affair behind his fiancée's back. But everytime I meet him I feel awkward, and make up an excuse. But deep inside I have strong feelings for him. I'm not sure what to do.

He's sworn me to secrecy, but accidentally my best mate found out, I trust her to keep the secret, she knows we've both had feelings for each other, because she’s sits near him on the school bus (I walk home) and she know that it's gotten so serious, I’m only 15 and this relationship is meant to be truly physical but I can't help falling in love.

Please someone help me, I don't know who to talk to, except form him and my mate, and what to do with my emotions.

They ain't really engaged, just planning to get married in the future. And by the way i'm 16 inthree months and the other girl is 14!

Please serious answers only!

Answer 1

RIDICULOUS!!

Answer 2

omg he is 17 engaged to a 13 year old. I wonder where the parents are that are letting the two of them get this serious at such a young age. As for you your 15 I thought I had found the one at 15 and miss out of many chances to have a most enjoyable time in highschool. You need to stop seeing him cause he is a player and prolly will always be one there is plenty of time to find the one. But you wont till you know who you are and what you want to do with your life.

Answer 3

HELP!?? Yeah, that really is what you need. Need to list some options. Things to do or not to do.
Have a heart to heart talk to a counselor, adult or parent!!!!!
I feel that 14-15 year old's do not need to have the word "affair" in their daily vocabulary. No one is married here. Enjoy your prom and music. Enjoy fun things, you will certainly have enough garbage to deal with when you reach the proper age.
I can understand that you may have strong feeling for each other, but part of being a teenager is growing mature to handle stressful situations as well as many of life's "temptations".

How would you feel if you bf did that to you?? nice guy right?
The boy in this situation needs to make some type of decision here. You are not having an affair. He is cheating on his young gf.

Answer 4

wow, 15 , 17, and 13 seriously. First of all when he turns 18 in another year or so it will be looked at as statutory rape. regardless of how "in love they are" Secondly you guys are all too young to be engaged and "having affairs" which is usually when one is married but anyway, this is puppy love and cheating is what it is. If he really cared about either of you he would let one or both of you go sounds like he wants his cake and eat it too, move on or tell him to get rid of her..but this isnt healthy for anybody involved. and remember Karma- what goes around comes around , later when you are all grown up and this guy doesnt even matter anymore because you three have all gone your separate ways and you find that one guy you think is the one and something happens like this and you are the fiance you just remember this little piece of your life.

Answer 5

You are wayyyyyy too young to be having these problems. First off he is engaged to a 13/14 year old!? That blows me away...you need to walk away from this situation pronto hon and concentrate on your education...you have plenty of time to find the person you are meant to be with...this guy is clearly a player and who is to say that even if you was with him in say 5 or 10 years that he would not go after another 14 or 15 year old? I say get while the getting is good especially before you get pregnant and you have no choice but to be linked to this person for the rest of your life...wake up honey and get to stepin!

Answer 6

woooowwwwwww.....stop! Too young, too many secrets, it all sounds really odd! and please don't use terms like 'affair', this is something that happens to people that are in a long term, committed relationship or marriage, you've got years ahead of you before you need to find out how it really feels to cheat, be cheated on, have affairs etc!!!! Walk away from this before it gets even more complicated. At 17 and still on school bus, what is he in 6th form!? So you are a 4th year, she is in 1st year senior school....This just sounds really wrong, do you have an adult you can speak to about this? Just have fun, age appropriate fun!

Answer 7

if he really had feelings for you wouldnt he have broken off his engagement. and getting married young doesn't usually work out. The girl is 13 or 14?? you don't know what's out there. this guy seems like a jerk if hes cheating on his Fiance why wouldn't he cheat on You? tell him to make a decision if he refuses end it. it seems like he is just using you and you should end it because you've already hurt his fiance and are enabling him to cheat on someone he "loves" tell him to break off the engagement until there a bit older. and i would stay away from this guy. what your looking for in a relationship changes as you mature. don't get tied down so young!

Answer 8

Listen to me, you need to leave him alone, doesn't it mean anything to you, that he's engaged to another person? Don't you know, if he's cheating on her, he'll cheat on you as well? This guy is just using you, he's telling you things, just to get whatever he can, out of you. There is absolutely nothing he can do for you, but leave you with a broken heart and empty promises, don't you think you deserve so much more, I think you do. You're only 15 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you, you may think he's the one, but he's not, if he was the one for you, he wouldn't be involved, with another female. Chaos is going to break out, if his fiancee finds out about you and you know, he's not going to leave her, for you. You say he's sworn you to secrecy, of course he's going to do that, he doesn't want his fiancee finding out about you. You say your best mate accidently found out and you trust her, to keep a secret, I wouldn't be so sure, even best friends, run off at the mouth and blurt out things, they shouldn't. She could easily tell someone and make them promise not to say anything and before you know it, the secrets out. I know you think you may love him, but you don't. I question why he's engaged to a 13 and a half year old, in the first place, doesn't he know that called "statuatory rape" and he can go to prison for that, you being 15, could land him in prison as well. I'm not trying to be hard on you or mean, but i'm always going to give my honest opinion, when answering questions like yours. My advice to you is to leave him alone and enjoy your life, as a teenager. Take your time and stop looking for a soul mate, you have your whole life in front of you. Concentrate on school and the things you'd like to accomplish, when you graduate. Your education comes first, there is plenty of time for boys. When the time is right, that special guy, will come into your life and he won't hide you, like some dirty secret, that this other guy is making you seem like. Leave him alone, you deserve so much more.

Answer 9

You are all far too young to be getting so emotionally involved, you should be out enjoying yourselves. Why should it be a secret do not let yourself be hidden away at 15 years of age. If this is your first love fancy picking a liar and a cheat if he is lying to her he is to you as well, plus if you are having sex with him that is why he wants it to be a secret so he can have you both on a piece of string. You will regret all this in later life you need a boyfriend who is proud to take you out and show you off in front of his mates.

Answer 10

I hope you're kidding. A boy engaged to a 13 year old? This sounds really fishy. For the sake of argument, just stay away from him. Find other interests. The other two need to separate as well. He's way too old for her. Do their parents know they're engaged?

Answer 11

Hes engaged to someone else and if he hasnt lkeft her by now, then he wont. He is using you for sex.
You are too young to be worrying about this, go out with your friends and have fun and forget about him. You will look back in a year or two and realise what a **** he is. More fool his poor girlfriend for getting engaged to him. Its her I feel sorry for.