please help me, i dont know how to tell my parents?

Question

how can i tell my parents that i want to go out. i know your gonna say that im too young, cause im only 13, but i really like this girl and she already told her parents. the only reason im going out with her is because she is movin in 4 weeks and i want to spend time with her. i asked my mom if she could come over my house and she said yea, but you cnt go into your room. i dont think my parents trust me that much even though they know i wouldnt do nything stupid. how can i tell them that i want to go out with this girl? i'll leave the door open if i have to and they dont know her. i do everything around the house too. i cut the grass, clean up stuff, and do all the other yard work(including dog pickup ). i have 2 brothers who dont do crap, and they are 15 and 16. i also have a sister wo pretends she doesnt remeber what my parents asked her to do so she doesnt do it. my brothers just got a new car and my little sister(8) gets basically w/e she wants. i get no allowance. please help me??

i dont really wanna "date" her, but i want to be able to go places with her without my parents constently watching, i would enjoy some privecy

i am hoping to get a parents opinionon this too

Answer 1

o.k. here's a parent's opinion....

At 13 I don't see anything wrong or unnatural about wanting to spend some time in private with a member of the opposite sex. If you were my son and you offered to leave your bedroom door open I would know that you were really serious and just wanted privacy, not necessarily "alone time". The only thing is, I would not want my son's friend, who is a girl, going home to her parents and telling them she hung out with him in his room. They would probably have a fit! Is there any room in your house where hardly anyone goes, that you could hang out in? Or would your parents be willing to take you and her somewhere (like the movies or a rec center or the mall) and then pick you guys up later? I as a parent would be willing to do that for my 13 year old son. Talk to them and see. I bet they just don't want the girls parents to get mad and they don't of course want to allow you to be in a position where you could lose your head and make a bad choice. Good luck!

Answer 2

Here is one way that you could hang out with this girl, and I'm sure your parents may consider it. Plan a movie night or something... with you, the girl, and some of your mutual friends. I do see where your parents are coming from with the room thing though. I'm sure they trust YOU, but if they have never met this girl they may think in the back of their minds that this she may convince their little boy (because that is how parents see their kids) to do inappropriate things behind closed doors. I wasn't allowed to have my door closed with bays in my room all the way until I moved out of my parents house at 18. One reason your parents may seem a little unreasonable is because you have 2 brothers who are 15 and 16, so your parents have been through this twice. The best advice is to sit down with your parents in private and tell them how you feel. Communication is always the best option.

Answer 3

Well for one being honest with your parents is a great start. I don't see anything wrong with it. I am a mother of 19 year old boy, a 17 year old girl, an 11 year old girl, and two toddler boys. If my 11 year old were to come to me in a couple of years wanting to go out, her dad may flip his lid. Your parents and her parents need to discuss maybe dropping you off at the mall or the movies. If they are moving away in 4 weeks, I don't see the harm. Oh, and when pleading your case to your parents, don't bring up the chore thing and your siblings. Trust me, we don't want to hear all that, we hear it anyway. Stick to your subject and subject alone. Work more on your request. I do agree that you are to young. But we were all young once, and we all did things in our teenage years that we are not proud of. That is what is usually on the minds of parents, not how trustworthy and great you are, but how crazy we were at that age, and what we were capable of back then. Agree to go go to the mall and have your parents stay at the mall, just not on the same level :-). Good Luck.

Answer 4

Dude! I wish I could tell you some great advise, but I can't and I agree with your folks. At 13, why do you need to be alone in your bedroom? Have her over to your house and watch a movie or something. Go out on a group date with other friends and have someone's parents drop off and maybe yours can pick up. Make her a nice dinner yourself and set up a picnic.
Look, I know you wouldn't do anything stupid. You sound like a real nice kid. But NO kid needs that much privacy with a girl at 13 years of age. Besides, if your not doing anything wrong, who cares who sees it?
Its a tough age, man. You know your mature enough to handle it, and your parents aren't ready to let go yet. Just understand that they aren't doing this to piss you off. They think they are protecting you. So whatever you decide to do, when you talk to you folks be respectful and honest. You want them to be able to trust you. Good luck little dude!

Answer 5

That sucks man.... I guess I would just be totally honest with them, and say it's really important for you to spend time with this girl before she moves. Also tell them you've never done anything stupid before, and you deserve a little freedom. Why should you be punished for being a good kid?

I don't know how I would have turned out if my parents were so unfair with me.

I agree with the other guy - be calm about it, and don't try to argue... the more reasonable you look the better.

Answer 6

Actually, everthing you just listed is your best arguement, show your parents, the question & plee for advise you wrote. P.S. to parents of this young man, I think he sounds mature enough to see this girl. I have daughters, when they were in middle school I allowed them to have boys over, in the family room only. And of course only when I was at home.

Answer 7

As to money, see if you can do chorse and rake leaves for the neighbors, who will pay you!

Then, find out what your peers (boys your age) are permitted to do by their parents and tell your parents. You are wise not to really date at your age - perhaps you could just hang out at the mall with your friend or take her to a movie with your leaf-raking money.

Answer 8

I am the same way... I am 13 also but I am a chick!!! well anywayz just tok 2 them...even tho it really doesnt work...srry 2 bring ur spirit down!

Answer 9

I don't think that it is too young, the only thing (i'm 12)
is that my mom told me is that you need to really know yourself before you start dating, because if you don't, then you end up molding yourself around who you are dating, and if you break up, then it is devastating. (i'm dating, and it is working out fine)
but yes, ask them calmly, and ask them when they are in a good mood!

Answer 10

If u like her do it i was young when i dated and my parents did not approve of it and i just did it because i loved him and now i have 2 kids to him and our relationship is still going...