Im dreading having sex with my boyfriend again. Iv never felt such pain. Iv heared horror stories about losing your virginity but I never thought it was actually true. I dnt think Id be able to do it again. Please help.
2006-11-04 09:07:49 · 22 answers · asked by Helen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Doesn't sound like you were ready, it hurts if you are not lubricated or turned on enough, get your boyfriend to concentrate on turning you on more beforehand and perhaps get some KY jelly.
It does get better, just think the Human Race would have died out before now otherwise !
Good Luck
2006-11-04 09:14:12 · answer #1 · answered by flossybean 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear this. Although some people feel some pain the first time they have sex, this is normally not ongoing, and is not normally severe. Sex should be fun and pleasurable for both parties!
Some thoughts:
Ensure that you are really ready, both mentally and physically. Most women take some considerable foreplay to be fully ready for penetration. And if there's anything emotionally making you feel that you're not sure this can make you tense up. Extra lubrication is always helpful.
If the problem continues, you should seek a medical opinion. Dyspareunia (painful sex) is surprisingly common and can be down to a wide range of causes, some physical, some psychological, most of which are very treatable.
In the meantime you really need to talk with your boyfriend and share your fears and concerns so that he knows what you're going through.
2006-11-04 17:15:51 · answer #2 · answered by purplepadma 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you broke your hymen the first time.....you would know that with a little blood......it may not be as bad the next time. If it didn't break you may have a little more.
The most important thing is to have a partner that is very sensitive you to....takes plenty of time.....and lots of lube.
If your boyfriend was not that way then you no doubt did have a lot of pain. Your boyfriend is the key to less pain. You must make him take it slow and easy.
When you are young that is hard for him to do but he must.
Once your hymen is broken and you have enlarged a bit you should not have any more pain.
If the pain continues you need to see a doctor. There may be something that needs to be taken care of. No big deal but it will make your love life a whole lot better.
2006-11-04 17:32:01 · answer #3 · answered by John B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've just looked at your profile. It seems from your other question that your boyfriend is cheating/has cheated and that you have other problems, like your gran, to contend with too. If all this is true, then my advice is to stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Stop having sex with your boyfriend until you are sure that he is faithful and that you want to. You don't have to have penetrative sex at the moment anyway - oral might be better!
When you feel your life is calmer then you will probably adjust to sexual relations better.
And if your boyfriend is cheating then please make sure you use condoms so you dont end up with an std to add to your problems.
Good luck!
2006-11-05 05:39:21 · answer #4 · answered by Caroline 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
next time you make love, use some lube, the first few times can be a little painful...for easy access and less pain, try lubricant, in time you'll actually enjoy sex and wont want it to stop once you got the taste for it....oooh to be a virgin again...
2006-11-04 17:22:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he being rough? if he is, tell him to stop it, you're not a blow up doll for goodness sake! Doesn't usually hurt after the first couple of times. I would tell him to go a bit slower. you are probably very tense as wel so you need to relax. Sex is good, very very good, so try to relax more okay?
2006-11-04 17:17:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the first time will hurt - it does get better, make sure you relax more and that you are not tense this causes you to tighten up, tell him to go gentle on you and only do it when you are ready.
2006-11-04 17:20:32 · answer #7 · answered by hunybuny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Generally speaking, it gets better. The first time can hurt, especially if you're tense and nervous.
2006-11-04 17:12:21 · answer #8 · answered by A 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
praise the lord & he is supposed to be gentle & caring ,if love making was anything else , then find a tender man. We are out there.
2006-11-04 17:29:36 · answer #9 · answered by RickeTy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like you havent done enough foreplay to turn you on.
kiss alot more and touch each other gently
maybe try some lubricants like durex play.
2006-11-04 17:15:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋