to fear love, or the possibilty of being in love, or the possibility of someone loving you
2006-11-04 07:48:19 · 21 answers · asked by Brutal_Yet_Beautiful 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
most of the people i have trusted in my life, since childhood and through my teen years, have let me down, could this have something to do with it
2006-11-04 07:51:25 · update #1
Yes, it is. I fear love in some cases, and it's sometimes hard to trust people, because I've been hurt so much in the past, but you have to move on because there are people that will truly love you for you. So don't be afraid! :) Chin up!
2006-11-04 07:51:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
No, not abnormal, though not seemingly a frequent response to the subject.
The fear could be as a result of 'an answer' being needed by someone: the fear of commitment or the fear of intimacy ~ which brings us back to 'the fear of someone needing an answer' ~ wherein an honesty is being called upon.
There is the additional element of both the fear of Responsibility that Love can create for us, and the fear of upsetting or hurting someone who has revealed their Love, and then possibly losing that persons friendship!
There's no one specific answer to the fear itself, it's often made up of areas of fear/s which create what appears to be The Problem.
Sash.
2006-11-04 13:41:27 · answer #2 · answered by sashtou 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand that. It isn't love you fear - but the pain of rejection. but sometimes it is worth the risk. But the feeling you have that you can never trust anyone again is getting very common and as a society we are getting more isolated, stressed and lonely. this leads to all kinds of problems like alcohol and drug abuse. To sickness and time off work. To increased health care requirements. It costs Industry and commerce billions every year in payments to workers who take a sickie - because of stress. We have a pandemic and the people who can do something about it, governments and large corporations pretend it doesn't exist and even make the problems worse.
2006-11-04 09:19:28 · answer #3 · answered by Mike10613 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think everyone experiences it to this extreme, but we all find love, life and relationships hard, and we all have to juggle our expectations when we make decisions about love. Yes, love is always a risk - but even when the outcome is not as we hoped the short-term lift can be quite a tonic and pleasure. Most people don't know at the start whether they are embarking on a short-term but potentially heart-breaking thrill, or a serious long-term relationship. I think your answer is that you need to accept and explore risk-taking.
2006-11-04 07:57:20 · answer #4 · answered by filmwatcher59 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes, it is 'normal' - your story sounds very familiar to my own, but at some stage you just have to get over it. the only way you'l ever learn to love or visa versa is by taking down those defences you built up over the past few years and just be open. now, im not saying life will be perfect afterwards, that you'l find the perfect partner and have emence feelings of love but all the same ya can't live life through a looking glass. take a chance....
2006-11-04 08:55:47 · answer #5 · answered by m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is normal; it's about self worth, self esteem, not believing you are good enough, or not trusting the person you think you are in love with. I'm living with my boyfriend/fiance(ish) and it's often confusing and painful, just, it's hard to explain, but I'm terrified I'll hurt him, or he'll hurt me. When you love someone they hold so much power, they can make or break you basically. But you have to risk everything because at the end of it there is so much happiness. Just jump, and he'll catch you.
2006-11-04 08:20:37 · answer #6 · answered by floppity 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey dont worry about it hunny i went thorugh the same thing and i still do now. and this is from a guy. most guys just want sex. its totally normal you will prbably feel this way if you have lost those who you loved before. and are worried that it will happen again. its hard to build up trust in people but one day it will come.. till then find strength in something you know will last forever like a per or something hope this helps *hugs*
2006-11-04 07:59:06 · answer #7 · answered by nommie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A friend of mine is pathologically terrified of love so much that she recently married a guy that she considered to be like her brother to her because she didn't have the guts to try to find a healthy and passionate relationship. I feel very sorry for her but hope that she can find happiness with who she has chosen.
2006-11-04 07:52:13 · answer #8 · answered by scared&depressed 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
well it is, but u shouldnt. I bet somethin happen when u were younger.
For me I was in love too young and i caught her cheating on me (in 7th grade) I was afraid and so I avoided women till now. Now I am a sophemore in college but I have a gf now and I am in love. I felt the same way. I didnt want to be in love, but i couldnt help my feelings. Love hurts, and my love is going to hurt me no matter what but love is love. Without love for something how can we continue to live.
2006-11-04 07:53:15 · answer #9 · answered by mierdurez 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yes. same here.this includes family members also. then i meet my husband.he stuck with me help me knock down my walls built up my trust. 14 years on still with him trust him,and totally love him and still fancy him. but i still do not trust my family or any one else. i do not friends as such.but its slowly getting their. i just say I'm very selective with my friendship if people ask.
2006-11-04 07:58:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋