I have met and fallen for a man online and he is 13 years my junior. My daughter is finding it very hard accepting that I would like to keep talking to him and eventually meet him (she's 13) She says she thinks I'm cradle snatching but I think there's a lot more to it than that. I'm really worried about this because I believe I've found my soul-mate. Please give me some good advice, I don't know what to do.
2006-11-04 07:40:02 · 8 answers · asked by kiwi_mum1966 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i think 13 years younger is a bit young
if you are 40 he is 27 & yeah he is far to young
you don't know what he is like !
& if your daughter is upset it is not worth it
she is more important
wait until your daughter has grown up before you go out with men
just put your energy into raising your child
2006-11-04 08:19:03 · answer #1 · answered by ausblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your daughter just has her own issues regardless of his age she would of just had some other issue to deal with. Very common for children to point out what ever they can to waver your opinion. You have to accept the fact that she may never be ok with this after all, all children have the fantasy that their real father will be back in the picture. Even if its never a possibility and every perspective step-parent is not good enough in their eyes. Your going to just have to take it slow and let her get to know him and over time and patience she may change her mind. Better not to expect much at first and then you won't be let down later. Most kids are not too happy when their mother first dates or has decided to move on into a relationship with out their father. Its only natural on her part but just don't let that stop you from doing what is best for you. After all she will grow up one day and find true love herself and your mate and you will be left together. Your children find that hard to fathom and with time and patience they learn. Our children asume that they will always be here but they don't realize when they grow up and leave the nest the mother still needs companionship. I say Go for it if it feels right in your heart.
2006-11-04 15:47:18 · answer #2 · answered by Mrs.Walker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! 13 years! That is a lot, but not as much as your daughter thinks it is. After all, it's her entire life! I say go for it and maybe once she meets him she'll come around. Of course if she doesn't you'll have to do something different because the kids come first, but chances are that she will if he's all you've ever dreamed of. Does your daughter have a "boyfriend"? Did she clear him with you first? Even if she did, you are the grown-up here and you have every right to be happy as long as it doesn't drive your child into a depression or something.
On a personal note, I dated someone 13 years younger than I once. At first it was awesome but as time went on I started seeing all the little things that made our age difference abundantly clear. Sure we had fun, but when it came to real life, he had a different work ethic than I, he had completely different ideas of priorities, and the kicker was that he was much more into going out "with his friends" than I was. Check those things out with him before you jump!! Good Luck to ya!
2006-11-04 15:50:53 · answer #3 · answered by rowdiegurl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough one love.
I've always preferred women in the 35-50 age range.
Now and when I was 18... (46 now)
It can happen that a match is good.
I had roughly the same problem with a 12 yr old daughter.
Funny though. She liked me. Thought I was the nicest guy her mom ever knew. But she just couldn't handle it for some reason.
She was very angry with her mother.
We could not work it out. Sad she was a very nice woman.
But to continue would not be fair to the daughter. We tried for a while. She just got stranger and stranger. Had to stop.
Right decision but very sad.
2006-11-04 15:46:51 · answer #4 · answered by Kaustaub 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations to you on finding a nice man. I don't care how old he is. Good men are hard to find.
And if you don't cater to your daughter's whims about his age, and put a stop to her nonsense immediately, she will continue to ride roughshod over your happiness. Put a cork in it and tell her to do the same.
On the other hand, have you met this guy yet? Have you actually dated in person? I have fallen for guys online who repulsed me in real life. Don't count your chickens before they're hatched.
2006-11-04 15:52:48 · answer #5 · answered by Ade 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think before you get to involved that you need to see him in person for a few dates and go from there. I believe that love is blind, shoot i fell in love and thought a 31 year old was my soul mate when i was 18..,but dont leave your daughter high and try keep her involved in it all, but meet the guy first before you jump to far and to fast.
2006-11-04 15:49:46 · answer #6 · answered by hermiasdeath 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
online relationship ...i don't know eighter. i have never met anyone online who is who they say thay are! i would be very cautious about him an especially if you have a teenage daughter. you think you know him but really don't know who you have fallen for. be carefull !
2006-11-04 15:45:43 · answer #7 · answered by ~just_jd~ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
go on a date and c what hes like.if u dont like him and feel wrong, then hes not the 1.
2006-11-04 15:43:54 · answer #8 · answered by Jennifer T 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋