I am 18 years old and married now for 4 months to my husband who is 24 yrs old. We dated for 6 months and i felt so in love with him that when my parents told me to never see (white trash)him again that i married him .We met when i was sneaking into a NYC club and he was helping to promote for a record company.The first 2 months of being married were great but i am a freshmen in college now and do not work.He travels a lot to promote and is always at clubs .We live in NYC right now and it was an adjustment for me NJ girl but now he wants to move to Houston for a little while and he did not even consider my opinion.We got into a huge fight because he says he works hard to maintain the standard of living i am used too and that i contribute nothing. He says he has the opportunity to be a producer which will boost him and that i should be supporting him?Do i go with flow?
2006-11-04 03:14:19 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I do love him but feel very stressed with this entire situation. I am taking 16 credits at NYU my parents pay so its not like i am lazy?I also now nothing about his industry which does not help and he gets made when having to explain things.
2006-11-04 03:17:33 · update #1
You entered into marriage. You should support him, and he should support you.
As a married couple you should no longer consider yoursleves as individuals but together as a couple always.
So stop the "he" "me" talk and start "we" talk.
2006-11-04 03:16:43 · answer #1 · answered by rchlbsxy2 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yeah, you should go with the flow but only after you finish this semester. You can always switch colleges, he can't switch employment as easily. When you finish college and you get a career, then this could be a problem, but not now. I'm afraid he is in the right! Never stand in the way of a spouses chance to better the families financial situation. Too many marriages die because of lack of $. Now that you know that his job creates a mobile existence, you may want to switch majors to one that will compliment that. Like ooh nursing. They can get a job anywhere.
2006-11-04 03:26:37 · answer #2 · answered by delux_version 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i might a minimum of ask him. in spite of the undeniable fact that, i does no longer evaluate a guy that would have you ever reside interior the streets and did no longer arise with money that replaced into promised to you, leaving you in debt a "father". perchance biologically, yet this is it. Do you even incredibly need somebody like that AT your wedding ceremony? somebody that hasn't supported your financially or emotionally on your massive day? this is kinda like a grey cloud. If he says "no", i does no longer even invite him and go away him out of your life consistently. you do no longer % unfavourable people on your life. i might additionally enhance the reality which could spend all that money on his spouse's mom and dad, yet he can no longer even placed money into his very own daughter. F*ck that! If he does grant some money, then additionally remind him which you have some bills which you owe and you % the money he promised to get you out of it. sturdy success hon!
2016-11-27 02:45:47 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not give up school. Let me repeat, Do Not Quit School.
Support is one thing following him around while he builds his rep is another. Let him know that you will keep the home fires burning. Ten years from now and times are tough , what are your options without the degree.
This is not just about him. You should not be subservient to his carrer while ignoring your own. This kind of one way thing cannot last.
2006-11-04 03:30:22 · answer #4 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is incorrect. You always have a say about what happens in your marriage. Cash or no cash. He is just being immature, and domineering. Call him on it, but be prepared for the blow up. There is a good chance that this marriage is doomed for failure if he is unwilling to treat you like an equal partner.
2006-11-04 03:28:43 · answer #5 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is really difficult because part of marraige is supporting eachother. You should definately support his career, but he should also have discussed this move with you. It affects your life and your education, so it was something that should have been talked over with you. I think you should consider making the move but make it clear that once you're married, your feelings are just as important, and he needs to talk things over with you first.
2006-11-04 03:23:04 · answer #6 · answered by Miami Lilly 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
For the time being. He is the provider and as such, he needs to go where he can best do his job. In the meantime, find your own niche, your own identity. But don't let him come to the point where he doesn't appreciate you. You are his wife, his companion and his partner. Make sure you live up to all those.
2006-11-04 03:19:16 · answer #7 · answered by Emm 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you see,,if you hadnt rushed into this marriage you would have known this about him ,,,he isnt going to change his mind by the sounds of it so you have to decide,,go with your husband who you dont really know or even trust has your basic needs in mind or go back home to family. consider what you will do if you do leave with him,,will he see it as commitment and belief in him or will he treat you the same as now? you are living this life it is a choice whether or not you actually want it.
2006-11-04 03:18:31 · answer #8 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him that he is the one making a living and you are the one making life worth living. How long does he want to go to Houston for? Maybe you can stay in NY and continue school .
I agree, it was wrong for him not to consider your opinion.
2006-11-04 03:19:38 · answer #9 · answered by Marti M 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
of course you go with the flow......
You can go to school anywhere....
Why would you get your butt in a knot about your husband advancing his career?
YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LUCKY YOU ARE LADY
Support him and do what needs to be done ... pack your stuff and go...
Crap like this is why divorce is so prevelant today...No one wants to do what is best for all... Everyone wants their own way ...
What ever it takes... is the role of a good wife
2006-11-04 03:19:30 · answer #10 · answered by lady_available_4luv 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋