What is the chance of a father getting rights or custody?

Question

I I have a son that is going to be 2 in Dec. His father left me when I was approximately 3 months pregnant, because I wouldn't have an abortion. Orighinally, I was going to sign over my rights of my son, but then decided to keep him, because my heart wouldn't allow me to. My son was born in Dec 2004 and Jan of 2005 I sent e-mail to the grandmother that I did keep him. Well my son is almost two now and I know they both know I kept him, but are denying him. SUPPOSEDLY, the father said that if we do a DNA test done and that he is the father, then he's going to go for custody. Does anyone happen to know how long a parent has to go without any contact to the child, before their rights get stripped automatically?

ok, it seems like a majoirty of you think this is about him not paying child support. It's not. It's the fact that he wanted me to have an abortion and I couldn't do it, then he left me when I was approximately 3 months pregnant. I know he knows I kept him, because his mother sent me e-mail approximately a month after he was born and I told her that I did keep him. At this time, she was living here in Salem, the same town I do and never made any more contacts after that.
Now, a few months ago maybe almost a year ago, I found out he's living in Centralia about a half hour from here and there has still been no contact. My son will be 2 Dec 21. It's been a little over 2 years and 5 months since I have last talked to him and then approximately 10 months since his mother and I have said anything to each other.

Answer 1

Paternity has to be established before that time clock even starts.

Answer 2

A parents rights don't just get stripped automatically. U have to have them terminated through court proceedings that can be very slow or fast depending on the docket pending in ur court system. The biological father has as much rights to the child as u do. If he can prove that u maliciously chose to keep the child from his heritage them u might get a judgment against u where u both share equal custody or what is known as joint custody where the child would be half the year with u and half the year with him and unfortunately that is not good for the child it only serves to confuse him and sooner or later rebel for ur mistakes. If the biological father denied him now that he knows the child exists yet wants full custody of the child and u r feeling insecure why did u contact them in the first place u knew he didn't want the child, u brought this action on ur self for whatever reasons in u puny little mind. Protect ur self get his rights terminated before he petitions the court for parental DNA testing and be rid of him once and for all. Let ur child look for him if he wants to when he grows up and mean time u do the best u can for ur child.

Answer 3

Paternity can be established at any time even after child turns 18. Just because paternity is established that does not mean the father will be able to get custody. It would have to be proved to the courts that the mother is unfit to have custody.
Many states still believe that the mother is the parent who should automatically have custody. There is a chance he could get custody but he will need to prove you are unfit as a parent and he is more fit as a parent.
Contact title IVD Family Court for assistance to have paternity established. It is normally administered by the civil division of the county prosecutor's office. They can help you get through the court system and get child support from the father for your son. Ask the courts to have is withdrawn each week from his pay check.
Now the court will also order child visitation rights for the father but since the father has not had contact then the courts may order them to be supervised visits for the first year or two. Even if the father gets behind in support payments you will need to allow dad to have visitation or you will be held in contempt.
I don't know about parental rights be stripped automaticallly. My daughter's dad did not have contact with our daughter for like 6 years and still had his rights. You will need to contact an attorney for that. If money is an issue then check your state's web site for low or no cost legal aid info.
Also beware in some states grandparents can request visitation rights and mights take you to court for visitation.
Best of luck

Answer 4

Abortion is something that both parents decide upon, but it defaults to the mother. Meaning, whatever the mother's choice is. The DNA test just proves if the son is his or not. The only cases that I know of, where the father gets custody is if the mother cannot take care of the child (or is neglected in any way), or if the mother is an alcoholic or under any substance abuse. If neither is the case, you need not worry. The court will decide the frequency of the father's visit to the child. He might even be asked to pay for child alimony. You should also consider seeing a lawyer.

Answer 5

I agree with copycat,you just never know what the judge is going to do.I've seen some unbelievable things happen in child custody cases.Sounds to me like the father is just trying to scare you because he doesn't want to pay child support.Is he listed on the birth certificate as the father?A parents rights don't get stripped automatically,according to most states,every child has to have a father.If you strip the fathers rights,the child is then considered a "bastard",not a nice term but that is what my lawyer told me when I tried to have my sons fathers rights terminated.Personally,I don't think your child needs a father like this in his life.If a parent doesn't care enough to try help support his child,then the child is better off without him.If you can support this child on your own,that might be the best solution.Not fair,I know,but there is nothing worse than a child having to visit someone who really doesn't want them around,or will just use them as a way to get back at you.I've been there myself,I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 6

Father will not get automatic custody just because he steps up for a paternity test. However he may get visitations. He would also have to start paying for back child support and diffinently prove you unfit to take full custody. Since he has not been in your childs life from the beginning the courts will evaluate his situation and certainly make sure his visits are supervised. Once he see's how much of a can of worms he is going to open and how much of a picnic this is not going to be for him financially he might back off. I am certian you will always be the primary custody holder of your child. Another thing if his family was not involved it does not speak for a bonus for him either. A lot on negatives against him. I hope it all works out for you.

Answer 7

I have worked in law enforcement for years, and spent a lot of time in the court room, you can never tell what a judge is going to do. My advice is, if you are making it okay without his help, leave it alone. He apparently is not interested in the child, and if you go to court, you are just bringing a lot of sleepless nights and worry upon yourself. Child custody cases are cruel and vicious, and even if you get full custody, and he is ordered to pay child support, that doesn't mean it is over. The cost can be horrific, and that money could go toward your childs education, instead of in a lawyers pocket. There could be delays, postponements, in court, it could take years to settle. Check out my question about judges being held libel for their decisions.

Answer 8

Parental rights are never stripped "automatically." It is up to a Family Court judge to rule on who has physical custody; and what he visitation rights, if any, of the other parent are. AND to establish fair child support payments.

A parent is legally liable for the support of his/her child. I am inferring that his father has never paid any child support - well, you can sue for past and future child support payments.

I am also inferring that you have not communicated with the father directly. Don't rely on others to accurately let you know what the father thinks or will do.

My strong suggestion is that you go to to court to establish who the father is and to petition for past and future child support payments.

I am a divorced father myself who does not have physical custody. I gladly support my children. What good parent would not?

MORE. . .
I don't know of any state where a parent's custody rights are stripped "automatically." It's up to Family Court to award custody, no matter what has happened or not happened over the years.

Answer 9

If you're a good Mother, with a decent home & a job, you'll probably be ok. But the key to custody is a GOOD lawyer. If the babies' father has a good lawyer & you don't, you may have a problem. Good luck!

Answer 10

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