My third baby is not by my husband.?

Question

What do I do?I have a husband and three daughters but my third baby is not his and he thinks it is and he loves our baby so much.It would be the end if he found out.And I really am a nervous reck when he's holding her,knowing that she's not his.I drive myself crazy day after day with my deep secret.Give me some advice about my future,please!!!

Answer 1

you either need to tell him now or never say a thing and live with that .but if you continue to let him build a relationship with the child its wrong to rip her away later ,the child will hate u for that ,but im wondering is what about the child's real father?does he know about the child ?do you think its important for the real father to know his child.?

Answer 2

Well you have put yourself in this situation, I wouldn't expect G-d to forgive you just yet. You must first get the forgiveness of the offended party (your husband in case you are wondering). This is a consequence of your deed and you must pay for it. It is a great shame the children, yes all of them, will have to pay for it and have no doubt you will all pay for it either now or later.
I wish the situation wasn't that harsh and there was something else you could do but you already did it so now its time to fez up.
If you don't tell him I can guarantee you a very unhappy life and due to the great deal of guilt you say you are feeling you will start doing other crap to justify your actions and in the end it will be even worse. Life has a way of dealing with this kinda of situations, it might not be now, it could be in 20 yrs but at some point the truth will come out and you will pay for it anyways and by then with interests.
I am a very conservative man when it comes to family, I was taught that the honor, prestige and reputation of a family depended on the women of this family and defended by the men. It may be old fashion but in my family we live by this.
You are the role model of those babies, is this what you want them to learn? To cover inmoral deeds and deception with more deception?
This is a matter that you need to resolve with yourself, G-d had nothing to do with this, we all have free will and exercise it in every choice we make.

Answer 3

This is a question? Sounds to me like you really know the answer, but you don't like it. If you cheated on him, what the F@$^ are you worried about? The marriage must suck anyway...right? I mean, you had to go outside the marriage to feel wanted, needed, sexy, satisfied...whatever the reason. Instead of repairing your marriage and staying faithful, you took the easy road. I suspect you will take the easy road here and live with your conscience while not telling him. Somehow thinking that you are doing him and your daughter a favor. What is it with people now days...is it so hard to work on a relationship? Are we as a society that lazy? Must be, look at the divorce rate.... You know the "right" answer, I suggest you face the music and follow it through. HTH.

Answer 4

Some day you will tell him the truth,, It's inevitable. Hopefully for you and your family it will be in a time of non-distress, as that will only add to the problem and the complexities of the situation, as this situation it's self will cause some SEVERE DISTRESS!.... If you were my wife, I could not tell you what I would do, I have not been in your husbands shoes , and I prey I will never be, that would be terrible and tear any husband to the core. Tell him the truth and see where the cards land, none the less He deserves the Truth.
Doesn't He??

Just Tell Him

Answer 5

You need to put yourself in his position! Would you want your wife (if you were a man) to have a baby and not tell you that it wasn't yours?? Think about it! Your husband has a right to know, just like your daughter will when she is old enough! People make mistakes all the time! If he loves you enough, he will stay! If not you made your bed, and you can't blame him for whatever mistakes you made! ( if he decides to leave) Good luck on telling him! I hope everything goes the best way possible!

Answer 6

Your other post about your baby didn't mention this fact...
The real issue is communicating with your husband and working on the problems in the marriage that lead to you cheating.... because if those issues aren't resolved you will just cheat again and again.
Both of you check into marriage counselling and be honest with each other --- there's a lot of things that aren't being said

Answer 7

Hmmm you should tell your husband it is only fair to. He has the right to know that the baby is not his. You need to tell the biological father that he has a baby as well. It is not fair to your husband or your daughter. It might result in divorce it may not. You got yourself in this situation now you have to come out and tell everyone.

Answer 8

You played with the bull and you got the horns. You are very selfish to be worrying only about getting found out. What about the baby and the other children? Where's the a**hole who donated his sperm to you ? You were used !!! Your future looks bleak if he [husband] finds out. I'm even, mad at you ! Damn it !!! The children will be the real losers here. Here we go everyone ... another divorce pending - wonderful !!! Hope you had a good screw - because you aren't the only one that's getting screwed.

Answer 9

Then you cheated no if ands or buts,you are a low creature and don't deserve any of your kids,and one day they will find out what kind of mother you are,so will your husband,Your advise for the future is once a cheat always a cheat,and what gos around comes a round,so be ready for your heart to hurt,I have no good feeling for a cheater they are the worst.

Answer 10

if u tell him you won't have a good future, what purpose would it serve to tell him, and hurt him at this point. forgive yourself for it, and go on with life and with your hubby, so u made a mistake, it is not the end of the world. do not hurt your hubby by telling him,he loves the child, and the child loves him, just think of the hurt u will be letting loose so u can cleanse your soul, pray about it. the last thing u would want is for your marriage to end. just do the best u can, be good to your husband, and go on as if everyting were normal. forgive yourself, u made a mistake, why jeprodize your life, and happiness.

Answer 11

Don't tell him now, the child is going to suffer more than you do. You're going to cause her psicological trauma, ask God for forgiveness, only him could help you, by telling him you are not going to feel good, you're going to hurt the child and you other kids too, he's going to hate you and maybe the baby too. I think just God can help you on what you did, nobody can give another chance to regret on what you did, just God. If he finds out, tell him the truth and pray to God he doesn't hate that child as much as he's going to hate you.