I am pregnant and I don't want a divorce, but I don't know if I could forgive or ever look at him the same. Please give me (good) advice. If you are going to be a smart ***, please don't bother. I really don't need it right now.
2006-11-03 13:02:19 · 26 answers · asked by me_oh_my 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If u really think he cheated then u need to start gathering proof with which u can confront him with. If he is willing to admit it, then u can probably consider counseling for both of u. Keep in mind that it may take a while to regain your trust and u both need to work hard (him especially) in regaining that trust.
2006-11-03 13:10:52 · answer #1 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you know us women, we know if something isn't right, with our husbands or boyfriends, whichever the case may be. You say that you "think" your husband has cheated, unless you're for sure, you really can't say he has. I would straight out ask him and look him directly in the eye's, i'm sure you can tell, when he's lying. When people are lying, it's hard for them to look you directly in the eye's. Being that you're pregnant, you don't need any stress right now, it's very hard on the baby. I understand that you don't want a divorce, if he is cheating, but you can't make somebody stay with you, if they don't want to and I personally wouldn't want a man staying with me, just because a child is involved, he either loves me or he doesn't, there is no in betweens. All I can suggest, is for the two of you to sit down and get everything out in the open, honesty, is the only way to be. You could be getting yourself all in an uproar, over something that may not be true. You can think what you want, but it's the facts, that matter. Have that talk with him and go from there, for your sake and the babie's, I hope he's not cheating, you and the baby, can offer him such a happy life. Good luck.
2006-11-03 21:23:52 · answer #2 · answered by A_WWE_FAN_4LYFE 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having a baby is no reason to stay in a relationship. You may think that you are doing a service to the child, but you are actually hurting the child more in the long run. The child gains a view on the world and how relationships work by the modeling of you and your husband. My advice is if you have a good idea that he cheated you might want to consider moving on. Once a cheat always a cheat. If it's something you aren't sure on, then I would confront him or go to a therapist and talk to them about your feelings.
2006-11-03 21:12:17 · answer #3 · answered by Aubrey's mommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, of all, you said you THINK, that means you are not sure, you don't really know. Since you are pregnant, I suggest you two go to counseling. If you don't go to church, start going SOON! You will need a lot of prayer to get through this situation, if it is true. If he is not willing to go to church and counseling, I softly suggest you consider leaving him. I went though similar situations repeatedly and kept forgiving my husband at the time. I am of the mind set now "once a cheater always a cheater" based on my past experiences. I now wish I had left the first time I found out about his cheating. I waited years and several children later to leave. The cheating was always a problem, you see. He liked variety and got bored easily. I wish you luck and I hope you husband is NOT like my ex-husband. Not all men are bad, I now have a wonderful husband who would never cheat on me. God loves you and you are a valuable human being who deserves someone who will love you and cherish you.
2006-11-03 21:20:15 · answer #4 · answered by ruthie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Signs of cheating are always there for us to see. The question is do we want to see. If you found out for sure what would do? If your not ready for a divorce or have a plan then look the other way and stay focused on making the marriage better. Keep thought of the negative out of your mind only thinking positive. Know that eventually you Will have to deal with this issue, but only when you are ready .It is wise not tell your friends or family what you suspect they will not be able to look the other way and will cause you stress you do not need.
2006-11-03 21:30:41 · answer #5 · answered by dettie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your husband did cheat on you, it's true you will never look at him the same. But you can forgive him, if he really feels bad about it and understands it was a huge mistake, and is going to take steps to regaining your trust. Understand that no human is perfect. But if he is going to lie and deny it (and you know for a fact he did it). Then, for me it wouldn't be worth going through life with him. But it's your decision, you're pregnant, and I don't know what you and your childs situation would be without your husband. You have a lot to talk about with your husband, and a lot of thinking to do. Good Luck.
2006-11-03 21:14:00 · answer #6 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit him down and talk with him. Ask him what is going on with him. Ask if he is cheating and tell him you want the truth because you will find out anyways. If he is or has and you don't want a divorce and he has stopped then next you both need to go to marriage counseling. That may help you to forgive him, you will never forget though. It's almost impossible to forget. Good luck and God Bless
2006-11-03 21:43:06 · answer #7 · answered by Sexy-n-Hot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you think he cheated, you don't know? I am not sure if divorce can be considered if you: a) have no proof and b) don't want one. However, if he did, there are so many things you have to think about, on top of the fact that you may not be able to trust him for a long time, if ever. That will be the very difficult part of sticking it out. I believe you really need to talk to him. Be prepared for him to accuse you of being paranoid due to hormones. You're not, are you?
2006-11-03 21:09:33 · answer #8 · answered by Chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Key word Lul Mama To Be...............you THINK he cheated. This presumption needs to be proven before you can talk about forgiving, divorcing, etc. You have to confront your husband about your suspicions. You can't go all off the handle on a suspicion, and let me tell you from experience pregnancy will have you thinking there are aliens in your frig.........talk to your husband, you could very well be over reacting to something. I been married since 01, my husband and I have 3 kids, and I remember having a crazy spell w/all 3 kids!!
Talk to your Hubby Girl, get the facts first.
2006-11-03 21:12:09 · answer #9 · answered by NURSING FOR LIFE!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to do this but lets answer a question with a question...... WHY DO YOU THINK HE CHEATED ON YOU? start from there. Are these insecurities from being pregnant or do you have a legitimate concern. adfter answering this, then we would have a better chance to assist you with what you are going through..... For your sake I hope that he has not. If he has, you will need to decide what to do....forgive him, let it go., or decide to allow it to happen and ignore the problem, or participate and have threesomes....all these are not the only options of course........ I hope that for you and your babies sake, he is not.
2006-11-03 21:15:24 · answer #10 · answered by R O 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋