He doesn't do it all the time but when he crys and I know nothin else is wrong I pick him up and he stops crying. I don't want him to become spoiled or a hold me baby. So how can I nip this in the butt now. So he doesn't become a hold me baby. I'm a stay at home mom and he is my 1st child so I don't want to give him too much attention because I can because I have free time on my hands. Any advise??
2006-11-03 08:00:14 · 25 answers · asked by Sondra 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
well first of all babies cry to communicate, so if you know he's not hungry or tired, or not feeling good etc.. you can't spoil a baby, when they are 2 months and older they catch on to what happens when they cry, so they can do it on just to get your attention, and i agree you should cherish every moment with him, but i also know (a stay at home mom with a 3mo old) and two older kids, but anyways i know you do need time to yourself and time to clean and take care of bills etc. so to break him of the habit of crying just for you to pick him up, you walk over to him and get right down to his eye level and talk to him, and let him know that you know he's there and your not ignoring him but don't pick him up, and it might help if you put him someplace where he can see you for a little bit so he knows your not totaly gone, he'll feel more at ease and just show him again and again that you are there but he's ok if he's not being held
2006-11-03 15:44:26 · answer #1 · answered by babygirlx21 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
at 4 months old he is not crying without a reason. His reason is that he feels the need to be with you. If holding him stops his crying, then hold him. You cannot spoil a 4 month old baby! My daughter was like that too, she was forever in my arms. But she did get over it, and now at 17 months she is so busy she never has time to cuddle. I think if you let him cry it out you will teach him that mom cannot be counted on to meet his needs. He needs your attention right now, and you have the ability to meet his needs.
2006-11-03 08:26:43 · answer #2 · answered by S M 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Just let him cuddle you, he just needs to know that you are there. You don't have to worry about him being spoiled. I held my daughter a lot at that age and she is wonderful and not at all spoiled now that she is 18 months. She is very secure, she can run off and play and know that mommy will be there when she wants to come back. She isn't at all clingy and really is the best little girl that I could hope for.
Just indulge your baby in these first months...it's precious time that you are never going to get back. Do you want to spend it listening to him cry?
2006-11-03 08:25:56 · answer #3 · answered by ♥Pamela♥ 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When he starts to fuss just continue to talk to him, and stay in sight. Let him know that you are there, and he will calm down. You can try to distract him with a toy or new object. And don't take other postings to heart, if you don't feel like you should hold him all the time, then don't do it. What works for another mother, may not work or be the solution for another. You're doing great.
You son will still know you love him if you don't pick him everytime.
2006-11-03 08:34:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-03 06:10:09 · answer #5 · answered by marceau 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I always held my babies when they cried. I do not think you will spoil a 4 month old baby by holding him. Right now if you are a stay at home mom then your job is the baby, and you should hold him. Otherwise all you are teaching him is that he is powerless and alone. Whereas if you pick him up when he cries he will feel secure.
2006-11-03 08:04:13 · answer #6 · answered by WendyD1999 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
apparently, most of the people who posted didn't understand what you are actually asking....
you want to be able to do a few things around the house & want him to be able to be more independant in baby terms. you aren't trying to deprive him of love, but actually just wanting a few minutes to get dinner cooked or some clothes folded.
so, you just have to let him cry sometimes when you know there isn't anything really wrong. there isn't any real easy way around it other than to listen to the cries for a while sometimes. i heard this advice from a very good neighbor of mine who was also a loving mother of 10 wonderful children.
2006-11-03 08:12:15 · answer #7 · answered by christy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is just what babies do. He will not get spoiled, they need lots and lots of love and attention. Just make sure that when he is content and happy doing something by himself, that is when you leave him alone. I made the mistake of thinking I needed to talk to, sing to and interact with my first child at all times. I never, never gave him a chance to just be and play quietly when he was an infant. But don't think that he is getting spoiled. All babies need lots of attention. Give it to him when he needs it.
2006-11-03 08:05:42 · answer #8 · answered by luveeduvee 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is already spoiled. I held mine all the time whether he liked it or not, and he is just fine today. Some kids are just needier than others. My daughter is the whiniest kid in the world and my son is not. They were raised the same.....SORRY!! You could just ignore it for up to 30 minutes at a time. Let your baby know that you are there, but your not gonna pick him up at the first sign of discomfort.
2006-11-03 08:05:00 · answer #9 · answered by clawbeaja 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
theres no such thing as spoiling your baby!! Its ok, lots of moms think the same way. As long as your baby cries, hes gonna wanna be held, and theres nothing saying that if you pick him up every time he cries he'll become spoiled, if actually shows him that he can depend on you for anything, no matter how small, and you'll always be there for him. Dont stop Mommy!!
2006-11-03 08:04:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋