i miscarried...?

Question

I am 19 and miscarried at the age of 18 last January... It was rough at first that was pregnant but we were all looking forward to it. it is still so hard to wake up everyday knowing my baby would be here with me if it didn't happen... i no i shouldn't think that way, and I no it could have been worse but its just so hard....What can i do to get my mind away from it? I just can't wait to be a mom....
recently its been real hard.. two of my friends are pregnant and I think why them, why not me? I talk to my fiance about it and he says it will happen when it happens and he looks forward to having one soon... I think i am having a hard time because how I felt when i was pregnant. I try to be patient and stuff but i sometimes get a little impatient, especially because I almost had my chance! I do look at the situation as, well it wasn't my time and there could have been something wrong with the baby.... and everything happens for a reason... I just don't no what to do..

i was attending my second appointment without my fiancee cause i thought everything was fine... but they weren't.. i think it was hard that way too.. i was all alone and i thought everything was fine... all excited to see how big the baby had gotten and to listen to the heartbeat!

Answer 1

I have had four M.C since i was 15 my first was twins then a boy then a girl then another girl and then i finally had a baby boy who lived he was dead when he was born though but he is 14 months now. and i might be having another M.C right now but if i am it is diff then all my others but thats cuz i have an IUD in at the moment. all i can say is i know how much it breaks your heart. But be stong you will have a baby. just have sex everyday for a month well except when your on your rag LOL. do this for how ever long it takes it will double your chances of getting pregnant. it may take a yr or two or more but it will happen and after it does you will be able to get pregnant much easyer. My cusin tryed for 7 yrs and lost several babies and then she finally got pregnant her son is now 2 yrs old and she is pregnant again so it may take time but it will happen good luck and God Bless.

Answer 2

I have had three miscarriages so far and wasn't upset with the first two, even though we had been trying for a year, but my third pregnancy was unplanned and unfortunately I thought about it all the time. I think it was because I didn't know I really wanted another baby until that one came along and it was my last chance. It wasn't, we are pregnant again and it wasn't planned either. Yes we used birth control. My point is it is hard to lose a baby even if it was here only a short time and you should allow yourself to be upset, but don't dwell on it. You are young, you have a fiancee who wants to have children so I'm sure you will be pregnant again and you will savor it even more the next time. Enjoy the time preparing your body for your next pregnancy, eat right, take prenatal vitamins, exercise, etc. Think of it as the pre-first trimester.

Answer 3

You should understand that a very large percentage of all women who have children have some form of miscarriage at some point - sometimes it's just a late, heavy period - and that nature and your body can miscarry for a reason, like the egg and sperm just didn't combine quite right by chance.

Relax and concentrate on being healthy and having resources ready, so that you're ready again when the time comes. You're probably still a little depressed, and if you're in an area where it's becoming winter, that doesn't help matters. Make sure you're taking some B vitamins, get some exercise, and if you're still depressed find a therapist who can help you through it.

Answer 4

Mother nature has a way of eliminating the babies that wouldn't have survived if they had been born....i am really sorry to hear that you miscarried and that it is bothering you but if you truly believe in fate then look at it like this......it is better to have miscarried early in pregnancy than to have carried your baby to term only to have it pass away on you in a couple of days or even hours. I felt the same way as you when i was having a hard time getting pregnant with my son but it will happen when the time is right and you will then have the baby that you are meant to have......good luck and i hope you feel better.

Answer 5

It gets better as time goes by. If I were you i would work on making myself better for my baby. Like you I also had miscarried at the age of 19. I decided to go to back to school to get a better degree. I just turned 24 last week and I am pregnant again and now I have more to offer my baby. Maybe we can now go do the extras that would not have been able to do with my but loved baby.
Good Luck

Answer 6

I miscarried in Jan 08 and it is devastating whilst you desire a youngster such a lot. You truthfully simply need to think that youngster wasn't supposed to be and keep confident you're going to have an extra. Unfortunately there's a one million in four threat whenever you get pregnant that you're going to miscarry so that you so much likley had unhealthy success. Have religion and check out once more whilst equipped. My husband and I made up our minds that it might make us blissful to be pregnant once more and conceived the very subsequent month and went directly to have a healthful lady in November. Good success and simply comprehend it will get bigger.

Answer 7

I think you're doing the right thing by talking about it. The self talk you are using, such as telling yourself it wasn't your time, there could have been something wrong with the baby, etc can help a lot. Whevever you have negative thoughts that will only bring you down, stop them immediately, replace those thoughts with something positive. It's important not to sit and dwell on the past, and on what might have been.

My wife miscarried while I was in jail... (long story! heh) It affected her differently than me, and sent her into a deep depression, and I think a big part of it was that she refused to talk about it. She wanted to just pretend it didnt happen and that she wasn't dissapointed, but deep down it was tearing her apart.

Answer 8

first off i want to say how sorry i am about your situation. secondly, try not to pay any attention to people like jewie. I have a friend who had a miscarriage 3 or 4 years ago. She had a tough time when people around her got pregnant too. i also know that if you miscarry one time, the chance is greater to miscarry a second time. i would wait a few years to get pregnant because of the risk. my friend just had her baby shower. also about 2 years ago my fiance's sister had a miscarriage. she is pregnant and due on her birthday in february. i just believe it's best to wait at leact a couple of years before getting pregnant again. good luck and i hope for the best. as far as how you're feeling, it's perfectly natural to miss a miscarried baby. you're still in the process of grieving for your child. i know my friends were scared to be moms at such young ages, but when they miscarried, their worlds fell apart and they WANTED to be moms so bad. they waited until they weren't grieving anymore and it was best for them to wait for as long as they did. again good luck and i hope for the best.

Answer 9

may i suggest that u need to wait a few years, u are awfully young and its not as easy as some ppl thinks it is. live your life to the fullest first before starting a family, in a couple of years u may want to be going to clubs and stuff with friends and with a baby u can't do that and if u get a sitter every weekend so u can do that ppl will look at u like u are a bad mother. so i would really say the miscarriage could be Gods way of saying that u have so much to live for, live for yourself first then start a family

Answer 10

i know what you mean... i found out i was 4 weeks pregnant Sept 21st... i had my pre-natal checkup Oct. 3rd... my first ultra sonogram Oct. 25Th.... i was so excited i was going to have my first baby's picture.... but... the doctor couldn't find the embryo... we saw the embryo sac... but no embryo inside.... so she told me my pregnancy was not normal...i had a blood test done that same day(wed)... another on Friday... she called me on Saturday to tell me my pregnancy hormone levels were dropping... what it means my pregnancy is not going right on track.... i started spotting on Friday....i had a miscarriage this past Sunday..... its painful... i know what you are going through... but you have done nothing wrong.... sometimes your body knows something is not right with the embryo and decides to throw it away to start all over again...

i don't know how long ago did you miscarried... but if its been over 3 months and you have had 2 normal periods.... you can try to get pregnant and it will be a healthy pregnancy...

sweety.... that kind of thinks unfortunately happens more often that we think.... but you are young don't let what happened affect you so much.... things happen for a reason.... don't live in the past... look to the future and you;ll be a mom soon.