Can anyone come and give me my sponge bath? Mother is too tired tonight and I am starting to smell?

Answer 1

Why is Mother tired, Crispy? Worn her out have you?

Tragically, I cannot make it for the sponge bath. I have decided to hit the local discotheque and find myself a man. Any man. I'm not proud.

Answer 2

obesity for some is a disease, not their diet. some people are born with a fouled system-endocrine disorders are to blame, others may be on medications such as steroids for a condition or another medication that causes weight gain...this is not a laughing matter, nor are sponge baths. infact most obese people can lather themselves and rinse off just like any other person.

now...where did i put that bar of soap so i can kindly rinse your mouth out with it?

Answer 3

I will, let me know where and I'll come and scrub you clean, getting into those mighty folds of yours will be a bit of a challenge but I could do with a good work out, making sure to get all the crumbs and dried up milkshake out of your many chins will be very rewarding for me...

Lets do it...

Answer 4

i cant give you a sponge bath so how do you feel about a jet wash

Answer 5

Sponge no? Try going through the local car wash....

Answer 6

looking at your picture,I dont think that a sponge would be big enough. What about a large piece of the Great Barrier Reef?

Answer 7

Sponge bath?? Looking at the size of you it would have to be a very big sponge, or I could jetwash you.

Answer 8

OK honey I'll just stop at the CO OP first and get some Vim, shall I bring that extra large loo-fer I know that you like ? x

Answer 9

Aww

Answer 10

I'll send my colleague - Jack the Unzipper - over. He's a bit heavy handed, but if you're desperate........