At my age should I be doing this/?

Question

Im 16 my boyfriend is 19 and we've been daiting for awhile. We've been kind of planning our future together. Like getting a place and getting married. Not anytime soon. But in like a few years. We dont mind waiting because we're both in school and getting jobs, and know we're too your right now. So should we still be talking about all this?

Answer 1

At your ages talking about is not that unusual.............whether it actually is more than youthful pipe dreams is another matter...and only time will tell.

Answer 2

I don't think there is anything wrong with having these conversations with your boyfriend ... I did when I was your age .... but keep these conversations in perspective and in their place: they are for a time in the future - say 10years (that only makes you 26 and him 29) - might sound like a lifetime but in reality it's not ..... it is however plenty of time for you both to look at and get involved in developing future employment prospects, a career, qualifications that will give you these opportunities - it will also give you the time and the opportunity to experience real life and the rest of the world .... travel, working in other countries, developing wider friendships ..... I know you've probably heard it all before and... it might be boring .... but it's true .....
I was the same age as yourself and my boyfriend was the same age as yours - we married when I was 18 and divorced when I was 23 ..... I had been nowhere and done nothing of any value .... I thought I knew it all, at least all I needed to know and had experienced everything I wanted to ..... after 23 I found out how little I really did know, how inexperienced I was and how much the rest of the world and society had to offer that I didn't even know existed ..... at 49 I've managed to catch up with myself to some fair extent, but there are still many things I haven't done, probably won't do now that I wished I had done when I'd had the time and age on my side .... instead of being totally besotted and focussed on one person and all their wants and needs ......
Take life by the throat and live it - today is the tomorrow you might be worrying about.... but I promise it will be worth it .... when you're old and grey you will have a lifetime of experiences and memories that no one person alone can ever give you .... and you will be content with the life you end up with because of it .....

Answer 3

Defiantly not, you should be planning next weeks party or outing, you should concentrate on what clothes are in fashion and when you can go shopping next, go phone a girlfriend right now and arrange to meet later have a great time. When you have done this have another chat with your boyfriend about cooling things and just being good friends for couple of years, then see how you feel. Good luck enjoy your teens. (one of my granddaughters id 19yrs and at the present time is in Australia as part of a world trip which will last for a year) I hope this has given you something to think about.

Answer 4

You are still immature to be talking about this instead you should be talking about how to improve your lives professionally, and how you can concentrate on your academic studies.
If you look at it maturely,you should keep focused to your school work, talk about aquiring a degree and later a well paying job. Sometimes such relationships don't last that long and you may end up with a baby whilst your boyfriend continues upgrading himself.
I would advise you to wait until you both finish your studies and cement the relationship once you begin working, then you may begin talking about it.

Answer 5

It's only normal talking about these things now, just don't be putting anything down in concrete, a lot can happen between now and then.

It's good that you are both looking to the future and you seem to be planning everything out perfectly but unfortunately there will be a lot of unseen hurdles that will come up....just take things one step at a time.

I hope everything works out for both of you.

Answer 6

It's okay to plan and think ahead, but you are still very young. Can you really see yourself being with this man for the foreseeable future? Don't be in to much of a rush to settle down, live a little first and have some fun.

Answer 7

I think at 16 your getting ahead of your self, but there again it might just work, who knows?? Take your time Live a little first, enjoy your teens,see a bit of life, have a good time, then in your mid 20s think about it again. Best of luck ( hope it does work for you.

Answer 8

Talking about it and doing it are two different things. There's no harm in discussing it, but as don't do anything at the moment get out there and and have fun. You've got plenty of time ahead of you

Answer 9

with all due respect's to you both , but will you get out there and enjoy your youth while you are still young , you have all the time in the world to talk about those thing's . enjoy other people's company before you commit your self to any one person, while you seem to be sensible about it , you are running ahead of yourself to fast and so is your boyfriend .

Answer 10

It's fun to talk about it and dream. But don't get married til you're at least 30.

Answer 11

to be honest hun, we have all been there and done that, just be careful not to raise your hopes too high because there is a possibility it may go wrong, what i would advise you, as i learned from my mistakes is to remain as positive as you can at all times and believe in your relationship to minimise any unwanted chances.