well i will travel for about 5 monthes ...for my studying and i will leave my husband,,,,i ...feel that he will betray me...i dont trust him...well he didnt actually have sex with another lady...we have been married for only 3 monthes...and we only knew each other for 2 monthes before marrage...what r the possibilty that he cheats ...also how can i get that idea out of my head so i can concentrate on my studies...any suggestions...
2006-11-03 03:34:37 · 29 answers · asked by caramella 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Have a friend or a neighbor ride by and do house checks they will let you know if any suspicious vehicles or even if they see a female coming or going.
2006-11-03 03:37:01 · answer #1 · answered by RedRose 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You say he didn't actually have sex with another woman. Well exactly what did he do? Obviously something was done that has caused you to not trust him. Because of only knowing him for 2months that could be the cause of your insecurities. You did not allow your self time to get to know him. You made one of the most important decisions in your life when you decided to get married so quick. What was the hurry? You should have waited then went and did your studies and if he waited for you and still was intested then your mind would be at rest. You have made the decision now so now you have to be mature about it and go and continue your studies. If he is going to cheat he will do it whether you are 5 miles away or 2000 miles away. This is going to be a test of your relationship. Sit down and have a long talk with him about how you feel. Remember many military families go through this everyday. I wish you safe travels and a long marriage.
2006-11-03 03:50:01 · answer #2 · answered by cookie 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
1st of all, you should have prayed and asked guide to direct your path in this matter. How can you love a man and you don't even trust him. Was he a player before you married him? What type of person was he while you dated for those two long months? It takes time to get to know a person and two months really isn't that long of time. If you don't trust him to be alone without you then you should figure out how you can take him with you. You are going to worry yourself silly if he stays and you go and you won't accomplish anything and your trip will have been a waste and for what all because you don't trust your man. What was the purpose of you marrying him then? You have stated that you feel he will betray you. Apparently when you met him he was out there in the world of sin and apparently you feel that he still is or you wouldn't feel this way. We really can't answer this for you just give you our opinion about the matter which still doesn't matter because you have to do what you feel is right. If you feel this strong about it then don't go or get him to go with you either way you aren't going to be happy. God bless you.
2006-11-03 03:45:27 · answer #3 · answered by sharethalove 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want a husband that you cant trust? That is the most important part of a relationship. Is there no other way to complete your studies than leaving for 5 months? Will you be able to fly into see him once in a while or can he go to see you?
It will be difficult for both of you to be in a long distance relationship for so long, especially since your marriage does not have a form foundation of trust, and you haven't been together for very long.
2006-11-03 03:45:12 · answer #4 · answered by brendagho 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you rush to marriage so fast? Sounds like you didn't take it very seriously, so maybe he doesn't either? Sounds like the marriage is in a sad state. Does he know how you feel? Is he open to counseling? You guys really could benefit from it.
But when all ils said and done you can't control him. He'll do what is in his character (or lack of). If you got to know him better before marrying him, you'd know what kind of person he is. If he cheats on you, you'll have to decide how to handle it. Forgive him? Or leave him?
Just set your mind to school and let him do what he does. If it's the wrong thing, dump him and move on. This time, do a better job of choosing a partner/spouse.
2006-11-03 05:19:54 · answer #5 · answered by DivaDynamite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'er not going to be able to concentrate on your studies unless you find out for sure. I don't see anthing wrong with checking up on your man if you feel there's a need for it. Did he do something to make you feel this way? If not, then I wouldn't worry. But if he did, then there are things you could do. First, if you have the money, you could hire a private investigator. If that's out of the question, and you're not going to be too far away, make surprise visits home. Call him when he would least expect it. Have a trusted friend to check up on him. When you do come home, go through everything. Look for any reciepts, scents on his clothes (like perfume) ,etc. Good luck!
2006-11-03 03:46:26 · answer #6 · answered by November 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life is way to short to be wasting if you have to worry about your spouse cheating on you everytime you leave. Why would you want that in your life? You got married way to fast and did not have time to get to know him very well. You just need to learn to trust him and keep your mind on your studies. If he cheats oh well at least you have an education and can get a good job in order to support yourself.
2006-11-03 04:08:35 · answer #7 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you marry him if you can't trust him? Has he done anything to deserve this distrust? Why in the world are you allowing yourself to be separated after being married for only 3 months?! Why can't he come with you? There's a lot of fishy things to your story.
How about you talk to him first, then call him every day.
2006-11-03 05:48:45 · answer #8 · answered by Sean J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
put a hide cam in your room
ask people to stop by your place now and then
ask a neighbor to keep a look out for any different people or cars
always call him to tell him you love him and be happy w/ him
you should not be married to some 1 you dont trust
2006-11-03 04:32:03 · answer #9 · answered by ez-goin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is based on trust. If you don't then it is not much of a marriage (sorry to be so blunt). You might want to get a keylogger program on yoru computer if he is planning hooking up that way or review on line copies of the phone bill/cell phone bills to see who he is talking to. Only other think you can do (for free) is to have a friend (you trust) to watch him. but the question is Que Costodes i Costodates (who guards the guards themselves...)
2006-11-03 03:43:20 · answer #10 · answered by g m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't trust him, then you're in trouble. If he's cheated before, once a cheater always a cheater. Why would you marry someone after only knowing them for a couple of months?
2006-11-03 03:38:02 · answer #11 · answered by imasooite 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋