hey people am not a bad person so really no bad comments if its ok....erm me and my mate have grew apart over thre last year and it is getting to the point of uncomfortable...how od i kind of move myself away from the picture.she is into diffrent things than me and i feel as though we should not be friends anymore...not in a bad way just let each other be.can you give me advice...:) thanks xx
2006-11-02 23:17:58 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
It makes perfect sense that as people mature and get older, they develop certain aspects of their personalities and maybe some of us are not as compatible with our old friends. Lots of people refer to this as "growing apart."
This isn't bad. Nor does this mean you and your mate can't still be friends. It just means that you and her may develop stronger friendships among other friends with whom you are more compatible.
I wouldn't have a "talk" with your friend and tell her that you two are growing apart. If anything, such a talk may stir up conflict. Just let this maturing process run it's course; it really is a natural and normal thing. Down the road, you and her will refer to each other as once best friends, and now just friends.
2006-11-02 23:24:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately this is what happens, throughout life, not just when you're younger. People drift, get in to different things, get married, stay single, things rarely stay the same. Some friends will last the distance, and others you'll barely remember in 10 years. It's hard to deal with, I understand, but you'll probalby find that you will drift naturally. There doesn't need to be some big show down discussing the fact. As weeks go on it'll just happen. No point in falling out, when there's nothing really wrong. Just make yourself less available if that's how you feel.
2006-11-02 23:22:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
We all change. Friends never stay the same. Its sad, but time to make new friends that you have more in common with.
Friendships should be 90% natural 10% work, if you're putting in more work then neither of you can be very happy. Drift apart now and when you see each other in future you can be friendly. If it goes on too long you might fight and both get hurt.
Start doing things with other people and she should see you're having fun. Dont invite her to everything and stop telling her everything. But stay being nice to her. Incourage her when she does other things and be happy when she does.
Hope you work it out ok.
2006-11-03 00:03:15 · answer #3 · answered by nycgrl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the friendship has reached its natural course you don't need to bluntly end it, just let it peter out, call her less (but do it gradually or she'll think you're upset with her for something. don't fall out, you never know in the future you may decide you were too hasty). However i don't know why you can't just be friends but not close friends, i know lots of people i have little in common with but still meet up with them now and again for a chat, and enjoy myself when i do. Saying 'we're not friends anymore' is a bit childlike as you don't have to live in each others pockets, and sometimes it's good to speak with someone who likes different things to you, makes life more interesting. Your call though, i don't think you're a bad person!
2006-11-02 23:29:52 · answer #4 · answered by Nikita21 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The average time that a typical relationship lasts is 3 years. Sometimes you can stretch it into 5 years but normally somebody the man or woman is in denial. If you no longer wnat to be with somebody the best solution is the plain truth. How do you know that they do not feel the same way..
2006-11-02 23:21:13 · answer #5 · answered by Gaston73 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Friendships grow and change, just like people.
If you value this person's friendship, then talk to them about it. Try to see them a bit more and adapt to the new friendship that you have.
If not, you have to ask yourself, do you still really want this person as your friend? Will you both be happy if you stay as friends?
If the answer is no, then you need to think about where to go from there.
2006-11-02 23:25:21 · answer #6 · answered by dontstickyournoseupatme 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u dont have to be into the same things to enjoy each others company, if its her attitude or some other aspect of her personality that you dont like then thats a different matter.
just coz u like different music, sports, tv proggrammes etc doesnt mean u cant hang out
there must b another reason as to y your not spkin as much anymore, just ask her. communication is everything
2006-11-03 00:08:51 · answer #7 · answered by katie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should just stay friends. If it feels uncomfortable i dont think the relationship should go on but the friendship should. Dump him only if necessary. if relationship are only on the phone it's a bad one so do what you have to do.
Girl you can get through it
2006-11-03 00:18:20 · answer #8 · answered by girly girl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know what sometimes friendships just fizzle out and you'll find this happens alot as you get older, people move away, you loose touch they have kids so therefore there more involved with thee familys and you've just realized that you and your friend are going your seperate ways!
You could meet up in 10 years time an have alot more in commen!
2006-11-02 23:22:39 · answer #9 · answered by Jo. 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well if you have enough patience give him a lil' space to think things through.You can leave a short message to him like a love qoute, message like " i missed our great conversation" stuffs like that.Thoughts are incredible so try giving that to him.Am a man though we differ individually,i love it when my girl do that kind of stuff to me. Best wishes.
2006-11-03 00:12:13 · answer #10 · answered by james ian h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋