My daughter is almost 10 months, she's been ill for about 2 months with a condition that makes her really uncomfterble sometimes. Now for the past few weeks she crys every time I put her down. I've got 2 other little ones to tend to so I can't hold her all the time. But I do pick her up when ever I can. She immediatly calms down the second I pick her up. Am I spoiling her or just being a good mama?
2006-11-02 16:48:33 · 20 answers · asked by Lesley C 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
No! ur not spoiling her,I'm a mother too.a child who is sick finds comfort in a mother's arms,so there's nothing wrong with that.Your baby needs you,so please,be patient and show her that your arms are the safest place in the world.Good Luck!By the way, I LOVE KIDS who loves to be hug...
2006-11-02 17:37:16 · answer #1 · answered by carmi 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there is such thing as too many cuddles. If a child has gone through any kind of stress (and a medical condition can do it) then they need to feel safe, and reinforcement that everything is ok...so the attention she craves is ok.
The only thing that I want to suggest is to make sure you give all three children equal attention. You don't want the other children to feel unloved, or that you have a favourite. This could cause you to have three very stressed out children, who take it out on each other..because they don't know what else to do. I have two and have always told them that I will hold them both if that is what it took. When they are tired, they will demand hugs if they see the other getting it, but that is the only time.
2006-11-03 01:24:21 · answer #2 · answered by chelles_insanity 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your just being a good mom who is concerned. If you feel that the baby needs you and might be upset or hurting then yes pick her up. Before you know it she will be grown up. But you should be able to tell if you think something is bothering her or not. Make sure shes not hungry,wet and so on and then go from there. My daughter had several cases of ear infections around this age and also colic and let me tell you I would hold her all day long if thats what it took, but its nice to if you have someone with you to give you a break from all this. I think that is very important. Good luck and dont worry about spoiling her thats what God sent them to us for
2006-11-03 00:54:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You could use other comfort measures such as repositioning, pillow on the back for support, a comfortable swing etc.. U do not want to condition ur baby to cry in order to get picked up. U are still being a great mother- it is difficult to ignore the crying; however, u need to also care for the other 2 and ur sleep could also be affected by increase crying for attention.
2006-11-03 01:20:11 · answer #4 · answered by Bellisima 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My son is also 10 months and sometimes late in the day he has a fussy period. I take out my sling and carry him until it passes.
I think you are doing a great job and by picking up your daughter who does not feel good is showing her that you love her and are attending to her needs. You are building trust in her when you pick her up. I do not think that picking up your daughter equates to spoiling.
I feel sorry for babies who are not held enough and are let to fuss and cry for long periods of time. To me that is just cruel.
2006-11-03 15:30:48 · answer #5 · answered by jns 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not think you are spoiling her, you are being a good mother to a sick little girl that just want s the comfort of mommy. I know how tuff it can be, my 19 month old can not talk or communicate well ( we are working on signing) but I also have a 4 year old to nurture. I just play a juggiling act.
2006-11-03 01:09:53 · answer #6 · answered by notAminiVANmama 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter quieting down the minute you pick her up shows that she is only crying for your attention. At 10 months it seems cruel not to respond, but if it keeps on going much longer, then it will just teach her to throw a tantrum when she wants something later on.
You should reinforce her quiet behaviour i.e. give her a cuddle when she is quiet so that she learns that being quiet is better than being screaming for attention. This will be hard because it is difficult to pay attention when your kids are being good.
2006-11-03 00:56:46 · answer #7 · answered by snoomoo 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Both, but there's nothing wrong with that. When babies get sick, they tend to cling onto you more than they usually do. When my baby had a double ear infection, she was like velcro to me.. she got really touchy and she ususally isn't like that. But she'll calm down off of it when she feels better. And besides, you don't have a lifetime to spoil your baby like that. Those moments will come far and few between because they grow so fast.
2006-11-03 00:58:52 · answer #8 · answered by Dr. PHILlis (in training) 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
HI,
Trust me you are spoilong her. Even my 12 month son need someone to carry him. All this started after me hiring a maid, she always carry him.
Let him/her learn to walk. For a day just leave her with her toys. Dont carry her to much, sit and play with your children all together. Make her forget about carrying.
If we can stop them now, then it is easier rather than when their grown up about 3 years old u still see some parent carrying them. Your a very good mom. Just dont be too good coz it can spoil them too.
2006-11-03 01:37:20 · answer #9 · answered by treesha_006 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Other people will tell you that you are spoiling. But I do not believe that to be true. I find it strange that any mother can let her baby cry. So I think you are being a great mama!!!
2006-11-03 00:51:14 · answer #10 · answered by ooopancakeooo 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋